11. Erik
ERIK
Erik headed for the SUV with Jenny’s hand still in his. It was a cold, bright morning—his favorite kind—and he was with his two favorite people.
He was going to have to be very, very careful today.
I can do this, he told himself. I can go look at houses with my pretend fiancée and my pretend son-to-be and not lose myself…
“The sky is so big here,” Gael remarked, looking up at the swirl of gray overhead.
“That’s because there aren’t any tall buildings,” Jenny told him. “Usually, those block our view, don’t they?”
“Looks like more snow today,” Erik remarked.
“Are you okay to drive in it?” Jenny asked worriedly.
“Definitely,” he told her. “You know how it is. We have to get used to that around here, though normally not much until January. But we’ve had a couple of years in a row with early snow.”
“It’s nice to have snow for Christmas,” Gael said.
“I agree,” Erik told him.
He walked Jenny to the passenger side, his hand feeling empty as soon as he let go of hers.
When they had all piled into the SUV and buckled in, Erik started the engine.
Anticipating Gael’s request, he turned on the radio. Elvis Presley was in the middle of crooning “Blue Christmas” and Gael started singing along right away. It was so cute that it was hard for Erik not to chuckle, but he didn’t want the boy feeling self-conscious.
“The first one is out here in the countryside,” Erik told them. “We’re meeting the agent there.”
“Is that what you’re hoping for?” Jenny asked him. “A big country house?”
“I’m not really sure,” he admitted. “I asked Sloane to set up a range of houses, so we could get a sense of what was available. Lydia and I had never really discussed a house, so I thought it would be good to see different kinds of things.”
“Oh,” Jenny said, seeming surprised.
Thinking about it, he realized it was kind of odd that he and Lydia hadn’t dreamed about houses. They hadn’t really talked about kids either.
Maybe we both knew that what we had wasn’t the real thing…
He’d been far from home and lonely, clinging to the idea of love, marriage, and a place to call their own. All of that had blinded him to the fact that he was rushing into something with someone he respected but didn’t really love like that.
“Is that it?” Jenny asked, rousing him from his worries as she pointed to a green For Sale sign.
“Sure is,” he said, signaling and pulling down the drive.
“Where’s the house?” Gael piped up from the back seat.
It was a fair question, the further down the bumpy gravel driveway they went, the more they could see ahead of them, yet there was still no house. And the long drive was pocked with holes and places where the gravel had washed away.
Eventually, they passed a big barn, then rounded one final curve and an enormous house appeared.
“Wow,” Jenny said.
“That belongs to one person?” Gael asked.
“I guess so,” Erik said.
He parked next to a silver Volvo station wagon that looked like it might be older than its young owner, a woman with long brown hair who stood beside it, waving to them.
“That’s Sloane Greenfield,” he told Jenny and Gael. “She’s my agent.”
They all piled out and Gael ran up to Sloane.
“I’m Gael,” he said, sticking out his hand.
“I’m Sloane,” she replied with a big smile, shaking his hand. “It’s so nice to meet you, Gael. Are you excited to see this house?”
“Yes,” he replied in a tone that made it pretty clear that he was.
“Hi there,” Sloane said, turning to Jenny. “You must be Goldilocks.”
“You can call me Jenny,” she offered. “It’s great to meet you.”
“Well, the owners are here today,” Sloane told them. “They’re older, so it’s hard for them to clear out for showings. We’ll just be sure to be polite and positive while we’re inside. If there’s something we don’t like, we can talk about it when we get back outside, okay?”
“Okay,” Gael said, nodding his head. “We’ll be very nice.”
Erik smiled, knowing that the boy didn’t need the instruction to be nice.
They headed up the front porch steps, which Erik couldn’t help noticing were in need of a coat of paint.
Sloane knocked on the door, and a moment later an older lady opened it for them.
“Hi there, sweetheart,” she said to Sloane. “Is this the family that wants to see the house?”
“It sure is,” Sloane said, introducing them all around.
The lady’s husband had followed her to the door, so they made introductions again, and then he invited them inside.
Erik already had the feeling that this place was a bit too much for him. There was more land than he would know what to do with. Even leveling and putting fresh gravel on that mile of bumpy driveway would cost a lot, take a ton of his own time, or both.
And he certainly didn’t need a seven-bedroom house if he was living here as a single guy.
But he took the tour and paid attention. When the owners headed off to take a call from one of their many kids, he found himself turning to Jenny.
“What do you think?” he asked her in a whisper.
“It’s wonderful,” she murmured back. “So much space. But it seems like a lot to take care of.”
“Agreed,” he said, feeling happy that they shared the same opinion.
When the older couple returned, he enjoyed hearing them talk about all the improvements they had made over the years as they finished their tour.
By the time the visit was done, they were all laughing like old friends.
“Level with me, son,” the husband said as he walked them to the door. “Is this the kind of house you’d like to buy? My price isn’t firm. I want the place to go to someone who loves it.”
Erik looked to Sloane, but she nodded to him.
“You have a real treasure here, sir,” Erik told him. “Lots of land and plenty of space for a growing family. But I think it might be a bit too much for me. I stay busy with my work and I’m afraid I couldn’t do it justice. But whoever does buy it will be very, very lucky.”
“That’s fair enough,” the owner said, looking disappointed, but nodding. “Thanks for your honesty.”
“I hope to see you both around town,” Erik told them.
They headed back out to the cars with the couple waving cheerfully to them from the porch.
“I hope that was okay to say,” he said quietly to Sloane.
“It was perfect,” she said. “The man asked your opinion, and you were polite, but honest. That’s the best feedback you can get as a seller, even if it’s not what you were hoping to hear.”
“Good,” Erik said. “What’s next?”
“A house right in town,” she told him. “This one is smaller and newer, with nice finishes.”
“Okay,” he said. “Definitely something different then. We’ll follow you.”
They all piled back into the SUV and Erik followed Sloane’s station wagon back down the gravel drive to the street.
“That was a big house,” Gael said.
“Did you like it?” Jenny asked him.
Erik glanced in the rearview mirror, curious what the boy thought.
“Too big for us,” he said, shaking his head.
Erik smiled. He agreed with Gael, even though of course none of them were supposed to be thinking of it as for us.
“Agreed,” Jenny said. “Erik doesn’t need to take care of such a big house. That place was basically a farm.”
When they arrived in town, Sloane led them through the village and down Columbia Avenue, parking in front of a set of newer townhouses that looked almost out of place in the old town.
“Well, this would definitely be convenient to the Center,” Jenny remarked.
She was right—it was only two blocks away. He wouldn’t even need to drive.
They all got out and Sloane fiddled with a box that hung from the front door. A moment later, she was opening it up and popping inside.
“Okay,” she said, sticking her head back out. “Come on in. I’m just going to turn on a few more lights. Make yourselves at home.”
There certainly were a lot of lights to turn on. The house had ceiling lights, accent lamps, and even special lights over the paintings that hung from the living room walls.
“This is fancy,” Gael whispered.
“Yes,” Jenny said a little worriedly. “We’d better not touch anything.”
Erik knew she was saying that for Gael’s benefit, but it sounded like she was warning herself just as much.
They walked past white leather couches and a massive television hanging on the wall and into the dining room, which had a glass table with a modern-looking chandelier hanging over it.
The kitchen was all stainless steel and marble. A door in the back opened out to a slate patio and a square of pristine grass with a painted slat fence behind it.
“It’s close to work for you,” Sloane said as she came down the stairs. “And it’s in good condition. But there’s not a lot of outdoor space.”
“It’s the opposite of the other one,” Gael pointed out.
“Yes,” Sloane said, smiling. “Erik wanted you to see different kinds of houses today, so you’re getting lots of variety just so we can get an idea of what’s important to you.
Once you three decide what kind of house feels most like home for your family, we’ll know just what to look at the next time. ”
Sloan treating them like a real family somehow felt like the most natural thing in the world to Erik, and also one of the most painful things he could imagine.
“What do you think of this, Erik?” Jenny asked him.
“It’s not me,” he said automatically, shaking his head. “You?”
“No,” she agreed, looking relieved. “It’s way too fancy. Too bad, since it’s so close to your work.”
“This is very, very pretty,” Gael told Sloane earnestly. “But we need a yard for a dog. And the house shouldn’t be too fancy because I’m a kid and I might mess it up.”
Erik couldn’t help smiling at the idea of a dog. He’d always wanted one.
“That’s really great feedback, Gael,” Sloane said, clearly charmed by the little boy. “I think maybe the next one will be a good house for your family to see. Do you want to see the upstairs here first? Or should we keep going?”
Gael looked to Erik.
“Let’s just keep moving,” Erik said. “This definitely isn’t the right house.”
“Okay,” Sloane said. “We’re heading to the edge of town next.”
They waited for her outside while she turned off the lights and locked the doors, then piled into the SUV.