7. Mattea
Chapter Seven
MATTEA
“Mattea! Mattea! Open up this got damn door!”
I woke up on my living room sofa from a deep drunk slumber and could feel the center of my forehead pounding. My head was pounding and the light peeking in from the window was making matters worse.
“Mattea! I swear I’ll kick this bitch in!” I could hear Solace yelling on the other side of my door and instantly became annoyed.
You need to kill this nigga!
That crazy ass voice roared in my head, and I tried to shake it off.
I hated talking back to myself like my father.
I saw how crazy that made him look and didn’t want the same for myself.
That same voice was a part of me. I could remember it since I was a little kid.
When I turned six or seven Kayori noticed me always saying something out loud to no one in particular.
I remember her and my father getting into a bad argument over Kayori insisting that he take me to the doctor to be assessed.
It wasn’t until my tenth birthday I had a very bad episode.
It forced him to finally seek help and that’s when all the medications started to roll in.
One of my biggest diagnoses was Catatonic Schizophrenia, it was a rare case but something I battled hard with.
The hard side effects were, that I sometimes would become frozen in place and couldn’t control it.
I would also make sudden or strange movements.
When I felt myself talking weird with delayed speech, I just opted out of not talking at all.
I took my medicine and sometimes tranquilized myself to refrain from being embarrassed or people asking me unnecessary questions.
I could control the hallucinations; I knew what was real and what was fake.
The only person I trusted and kept close as a friend was Hakeem only because he understood me.
I didn’t have the patience to open up to someone else and let them see and know the real me.
I used to feel cursed and lonely, my siblings loved me and were always understanding that I was different from them.
They didn’t treat me any differently. Kayori and my father showered me with extra attention and love.
I knew my father worried constantly and blamed himself, but I didn’t.
I understood that I was a product of him, and some things were just hereditary in families.
I didn’t want any kids. I wouldn’t dare want them to battle with what I was going through now and went through as a kid.
As a kid, it was harder than being an adult.
Kids were mean little fuckers and they always made it a point to shed light on the socially awkward kid.
They didn’t leave me alone until I started beating their asses and being very mean, then I was labeled as a bully.
More banging broke me out of my thoughts.
I sighed and remembered a guy named Justice was passed out slobbering and snoring right between my legs on my bare pussy.
I allowed him to take me out, when really, I loved how thick and good-looking his lips were.
After hitting a couple of bars and fake laughing at his corny ass jokes, I let him come back to my house only because he was cool, and he gave good head.
Last night he ate me out while jacking off until his silly ass fell asleep while using my pussy as a pillow.
If Solace wasn’t being such a thirst bucket right now, I would’ve woken Justice up to feed him breakfast between my legs.
Rolling my eyes, I yelled just a minute and started shaking my thick thighs to wake Justice up.
Groggily opening his eyes, he looked around then down at my pussy and smiled.
I shook my head no and moved one leg above his head, so I could stand up and clean myself up.
I needed a pack of BC powder. My headache was vicious, I reminded myself not to ever mix Hennessy and monster energy drinks together again.
“You got to get up and either go or if you can’t fight like that grab your clothes and head to my room while I try to get rid of this delusional ass nigga.
” He looked at me confused and my patience was starting to grow thin.
I wish I had the energy to fuck Solace up for coming to my house and making a fucking scene.
“That nigga on the other side of the door is a thug, Justice. I’m trying to help you and your ego.
So, if you ain’t trying to get lumped up and fucked up in front of me, I suggest you go with option B before I open the door.
” I walked away and headed down the hall to my bathroom to brush my teeth and wash my face.
My headache was still on ten. Opening my medicine cabinet, I snatched the pack of BC powder out and opened the packet and poured the nasty ass powder in my mouth and drank some of the sink water to wash it down.
When I walked out of the bathroom Justice gave me a pitiful look and closed my room door behind him.
When I heard the door lock, I made a mental note to cut his scary ass off.
I walked to my front door, took a deep breath, and opened it with a smile on my face as Solace barged in pushing past me like he was the fucking feds.
Shaking my head at his dramatic antics, I closed my front door and faced Solace as he stood looking pissed off.
“Solace, how many times do I got to tell you that you not my fucking man! We work buddies. You chose to start giving me head and now that you acting like this, I’m ready to cut your ass off.
” I walked away from the front door to take a seat on my couch.
I must’ve had crack between my legs because these niggas acted crazy from just tasting me.
It was Sunday, I had to prepare to go to my father’s house and deal with him.
This bullshit with Solace wouldn’t get any energy out of me.
“Bitch, you think this shit a thrill? Like I won’t fuckin’ kill you?
What nigga you got hiding in this bitch?
” He yelled so loud I could see the veins in his neck pop in and out.
I bit into my bottom lip to hold in my laughter.
I didn’t want to start mocking him, if Solace jumped bad, he would be getting put in a body bag.
“Like I won’t kill you before you kill me, Solace?” I smiled wide at him. It was a challenge and a trigger all in one. Solace was barking up the wrong fucking tree with me.
Get the gun bitch and aim it at his ass! Since he acting like a hoe make him suck the tip of it!
I smiled and shook my head at the crazy ass suggestion.
That was Reaper talking, the bitch was a cold-blooded killer that got a thrill off ending people.
I didn’t have a split personality like my father.
Nobody was taking over me, I knew who I was, and I named that voice because I knew it was actually my twisted ass.
I would reason with myself because I knew it was a time and place for everything.
“Why you keep playing with me Mattea?” he kneeled on one knee in front of me and I got an instant flash back of Chad doing the same thing. “You must like seeing me act crazy over your fine ass, huh?” Clicking his teeth and smiling. Solace was handsome, his personality made him sometimes ugly.
“I don’t like seeing a married man acting a nut over a single woman.
Shouldn’t you be running after your wife and kids?
You can’t possibly beat up every nigga that I let taste me.
” I smiled as he eased both of his hands on each side of my thighs.
Slowly he moved them up until he was massaging my ass.
Licking his lips, like he wanted a taste, I shook my head no.
“Trust me, you don’t want to do that.” The sick part of me wanted him too. It was like my pussy had a mind of its own and she loved to be licked.
“You want me to leave my wife for you, don’t you?”
“Why the fuck would I want that? Solace, you will never take my virginity and I will never consider a man who cheats on his woman a candidate to be my man.” I moved his hands from underneath my ass and sat up to reach over him for my pack of cigarettes.
Looking at the clock on my wall, I saw that it was twelve in the afternoon.
I could sneak a nap in before heading over to my father’s house for dinner.
I stared at Solace’s handsome face, he was chocolate with dark brown eyes and a crisp tapered fade.
I stood two inches taller than him, but I liked his stalky frame.
“You need to stop calling me Mattea, it’s Reaper.
If you can’t get your feelings under control, then I will cut you off.
I’m really not hurting for money. So, leaving y’all organization wouldn’t be hard for me.
” I blew smoke in his face and smiled when it caused him to back the hell out my face.
“You really just think you that bitch.” He stood to his feet.
“I’m a grown ass woman, that’s never confused. I don’t think, I know I’m that bitch. The same bitch that got you over here heated ready to kill because I’ve been dodging yo’ thirsty ass.” Now, he had me annoyed and I was about to hurt his fucking feelings.
“I see that look in your eyes Solace, and if you really knew who the fuck I was, you’d stand the fuck down.” I stood to my feet now.
“That shit makes you ugly as fuck, acting like a nigga. I know you better chill on all that tough guy shit-,” he paused and looked at my bedroom door that was now twisting open.
I started to chuckle and shake my damn head.
Niggas were so fucking stupid. I don’t know why Justice thought it was cool to come out of that room knowing Solace wasn’t gone yet.
“Oh, that’s who got you acting all bold now!” Solace yelled loud as hell his fist balled tight.