Chapter 7 #2
“He, um, he has a plan for me,” I continue. Maybe if Carnage understands what’s at stake, he’ll be motivated to help me get out of town. “For his birthday, he’s having a party, and um, from what I overheard, he was planning to, um…” I can’t say it.
“Planning to what?”
“Um…” I feel my cheeks burning with shame, even though I didn’t do anything. I wasn’t smart enough to avoid a guy like Leon though, and apparently that trend continues, but Carnage does seem nicer.
“You can tell me,” he says, gently touching my knee.
Squeezing my eyes closed, I let the words flow.
“He was planning to share me with a bunch of guys. Like, pass me around and let them all… you know. I had to get out before that happened, and I don’t even know when his birthday is, so every day I wake up wondering if it will be that day and, and…
Thank you for saving me. No matter what happens, at least I didn’t have to do that. ”
“Jesus fucking hell,” Whisper mumbles from the front. “You just tripped the alarm, kid.”
“What?”
When I look at Carnage, he’s visibly seething, and suddenly his moniker makes a whole lot of sense. His rage isn’t aimed at me though, so that’s comforting. Kind of.
“We might not be the most upstanding guys in society,” Whisper says, “but we have our limits on what we tolerate and what we don’t. Hurting innocent people whether through sex or other means is a hard limit for us.”
“Oh. He didn’t actually do it yet.”
“Did he touch you?” Carnage asks through gritted teeth. “Did he take from you without your permission?”
“Sort of.”
“What the fuck does that mean?”
I flinch, moving back slightly.
“Settle, brother,” Whisper says, his tone firm but kind.
Carnage turns his head away for a second, dragging his hand through his hair before exhaling slowly. “Sorry. Tell me what he did to you.”
“I’d rather not talk about it any more, if that’s okay.”
“Rue, I need—”
“Carnage,” Whisper says. “Give him time. He’s been through a lot.”
Carnage nods, scrubbing his hand over his face. “Yeah, okay.”
He leans back in his seat, staring out the window and away from me. Whew, he’s intense. Whisper seems to be the calming influence, but how often does Carnage need to be calmed down?
“I meant what I said when I met you in the bathroom,” I say softly, carefully reaching out to touch his knee.
“What?”
“I’ll do anything you want to thank you.”
He scoffs. “Rue, please. I’m not Leon.”
“I know that. I just, I don’t have money or anything I can offer, but if you want… me… I guess we could—”
“Stop it.” He turns to me. “You think I’m some kind of asshole who’s gonna take advantage of you? You think because you’re reluctantly offering that I see that as consent? Dude, please. Don’t insult me like that again.”
His response startles me. A hit man with boundaries and morals? This is so weird.
“I didn’t mean it that way.”
“Don’t do that to yourself, okay? You’re more than your face and your body. You have worth, and just because Leon made you think you didn’t, that doesn’t mean you have to believe it.”
I hang my head as his words swirl around me. Could that be true? Could he just want to help out of the kindness of his heart? I can’t imagine a world where someone does something just to do it.
“Do you have family?” he asks. “Parents, siblings, someone looking for you?”
“No. My mom is dead and I never had a dad. I have grandparents, but they disowned me when they found out I was queer. I have an older brother too, but he never talked to me again after he left for college. He’s a lot older than me. I wasn’t planned.”
Carnage grunts. “That’s why you reached out to a stranger for help.”
“I saw you that night in the club and you looked so in charge and powerful. You broke up something between a couple of guys, and I felt like somehow maybe you could help. I’m glad I was right.”
“I’m glad you were brave.”
“I’m not sure if it was bravery or fear and desperation, but either way…”
“Either way.”
He smiles slightly, and it’s nice. He looks younger when he smiles.
“How old are you?” I ask.
“Twenty-nine. You?”
“Twenty-four.”
“I’m thirty-seven, if anyone cares.” Whisper sounds amused.
“You’re brothers?”
“In all the ways that matter,” Carnage says. “You’ll meet the others.”
“Are they all… uh, in the same job?”
“Yes.”
A few minutes later, the van pulls through a large wrought-iron gate and up a circular drive, then stops in front of a massive house. It’s beautiful, with a manicured lawn and shrubs.
“Whoa. You live here? Where are we?”
“Crestvale, and yes, we live here. Told you there was plenty of room for you.”
Whisper drops us off then drives around to park at the side of the building. I follow Carnage into the house, looking around like a kid in a toy store. “House” is not the right word for this place. It’s a mansion. And it’s so clean. I can smell lemon and lavender in the air.
The inside is exactly what I expected from the outside—marble floors, ornate trim, and expensive looking furnishings—but it doesn’t fit the image of the man standing next to me.
“Come,” he says, placing his hand on my shoulder before quickly removing it.
He leads me down a hallway to a room where several men are hanging out. Some of them are playing cards at a round table, some are sitting in front of the TV watching a movie, and a few are cuddled together in armchairs.
“Hey, guys,” Carnage says, drawing everyone’s attention. A dark-haired man mutes the TV, grinning in my direction. “We have a guest staying with us for…” He pauses, glancing at me. “For now. This is Rue.”
“Hi, Rue,” they all say at the same time, surprising me.
“Ghost.” Carnage points at the guy on the couch with the remote.
“Phantom.” He points to the guy next to Ghost. “Stealth and Nimble,” he says, pointing to the men playing cards.
“These lovebirds are Specter and Colson.” They’re sitting together in an armchair, with Colson on Specter’s lap.
Colson is so beautiful it’s hard not to stare at him, and when he smiles warmly at me, my nerves settle a bit.
There’s no way he’s a hit man. I don’t know how I know that, but I do.
If he’s comfortable here, I could be too, right?
“This is Wraith and Pax,” Carnage continues, gesturing to two men in an oversized chair. Pax looks oddly familiar to me, but I don’t know how I could’ve seen him before.
“Welcome.” Wraith’s accented voice is deep and friendly.
“Thank you.”
“And Boone,” Carnage adds, pointing to a dark-haired guy sitting near Wraith and Pax. He waves at me and smiles.
“Did Bellamy leave?” Carnage asks.
“Uh, no,” Colson says. “He’s talking to Shadow.”
Carnage looks surprised. “How did shopping go?”
Colson’s face lights up. “It was fun. Right, Stealth?”
Stealth just grunts in response, but I notice his lips curl up slightly.
“Shadow’s the boss,” Carnage explains. “You’ll meet him at some point.”
“He won’t mind that I’m here?”
“Uh…” Carnage glances around. “Probably not.”
“Probably not?”
Wraith chuckles. “He’ll be fine with it. We’re all slowly finding love and adding to our family. A couple of years ago it would’ve been unheard of, but it’s fine now.”
“I mean, my man is a senator’s son,” Nimble says. “If he can hang out here, so can you.”
“Where is Joss?” Ghost asks. “Haven’t seen him in a while.”
“Stupid job,” Nimble grumbles. “He’s been traveling to do his audits. He’ll have a month off in a couple of weeks. Well, not off, but no travel. I’ll bring him around.”
I realize quickly that all the guys here are talking about the men in their lives. Everyone is queer? That’s so cool.
“I can take you upstairs and get you settled in a room. Are there things you need from your place?” Carnage guides me from the room while I wave over my shoulder at them.
I shrug. “I don’t know what happened to it. I haven’t paid rent since Leon took me back to his place, so I have no idea what they did with my stuff.”
“Give me the address. I’ll check it out.”
I nod. “Nothing important at Leon’s. Just clothes and some books.”
“We have books if you like to read.”
“I do.” I follow him up the grand staircase, admiring the architecture. “This is a nice home.”
“It is. We’re lucky we found it. It’s private enough, but still close to all the action.”
“I’ve never been to Crestvale.”
“It’s a nice city. Clean, a little bougie. Nothing like Mistone.”
“That’s not a bad thing.”
“No.” At the top of the stairs, he stops in front of a closed door. “This room is free and you’re just close to me. I’m on the other side of the bathroom there.” He opens the door for me and I step inside.
It’s a nice room. Tidy, with a queen bed, a dresser, and two nightstands. There’s some art on the walls, but it sort of blends in. It’s a good room, but I feel strange here, like I don’t belong.
“Is something wrong?” Carnage asks.
“No, of course not. It’s great.”
“But?”
I shrug, wrapping my arms around myself. “I appreciate it. I do.”
“You’re safe here, Rue. You can relax and stretch out. No one will bother you.”
“Okay.”
“I’ll get you some towels and show you the bathroom in case you want to shower. Make a list of toiletries and things you need. We probably have some stuff around the house, but I can order anything you need.”
“You don’t need to make a fuss. I don’t have any money to repay you.”
“I’m not expecting repayment.” He turns to leave. “Oh.” Turning to face me again, he holds out his hand. “Give me your phone.”
I pull it from my back pocket and hand it over to him. He swipes the screen, looking through my settings, then powers it off.
“He wasn’t tracking you, from what I can tell.”
“He never had to. I was always with him.”
“I noticed. It took me a while to get close to you at the club.” He smiles, but it’s faint. “We’ll get you a new phone. If you need anything, just come over and knock. If I’m not in my room, I’ll be downstairs. Are you hungry? Thirsty?”
“No, I’m okay for now.”
“You can breathe now, Rue. I’ve got you.”
Carnage leaves the room and I sink down onto the cushy bed, bouncing a bit.
This might’ve been a decision made out of pure desperation, but so far, I think it’s turning out okay.
Carnage is at least respectful, and I doubt he plans to climb into my bed later and do bad things. That alone is a relief.
I don’t know where my life is going to lead me next, but at least I’ve got a little space to think about it.
I’ll figure it out. I always do somehow.