22. Jason
The last twenty-four hours have been hell. So, when a hand suddenly claps my shoulder from behind, I nearly jump out of my skin. I have no idea how long I’ve been standing at the Craft Services table for. “Dude, jumpy much? You know you can have a donut. We’re not kids anymore, there’s no one on set who can chastise us for eating some sugar.”
I turn to find Eddie, a longtime friend and colleague, standing next to me, eyeing the donuts. Despite my shitty mood, I smile, exchanging a back slapping hug with him, “Hey, man. What’re you doing on set?” Eddie had left the Agent Smith franchise a couple films ago, so it’s been a while since he’s been on set.
“Didn’t you hear? They’re having Olena and I film a flashback scene. Apparently, the footage they already had didn’t quite fit the emotions they were looking to evoke for her final fight.” He shrugs, snagging a chocolate glazed donut and fitting the whole thing in his mouth. “It happened to fit into my schedule, so I don’t mind coming in and getting some extra cash. How’s filming going in general? Are you ready to say goodbye to Agent Smith?”
As he’s talking, a vague memory comes to the surface about adding some flashback scenes. Everyone wants to go out with a bang with this final installment. As for me? I’m just ready to set this franchise aside and move on. After nearly ten years, it’s time.
“Mostly ready. It’s definitely time to move on. I’m just not sure what’s next.”
He nods, probably familiar with the feeling after leaving the franchise himself. After so many years working on the same story, with the same cast, and mostly the same crew, it’s hard to transition to new projects. “It was definitely weird at first, but you get used to it. Any ideas for what’s next?”
I open my mouth to give my canned response but stop. Eddie and I have been buddies for years, decades, if there’s anyone I should be willing to open up to, it’s him. Alexis’ encouragement a few weeks ago pushes me to blurt out, “I’ve been thinking about taking a break from acting and doing some writing.”
Eddie blinks, a stunned expression on his face. “You serious?”
“Yeah,” I shrug, heart pounding.
“Well, you’re certainly rich enough to afford it. But man, do you realize how hard it is to make it in publishing? Most authors barely cover their costs, let alone make a profit. Not to mention the public scrutiny you’d get. Not sure it’d be worth it, if I’m being honest.” His hand comes back to my shoulder, probably trying to seem reassuring, but it just feels condescending. But he’s just confirmed what I’ve always feared, that even my closest friends don’t see much value in me switching careers.
Fuck, that stings.
“You’re probably right. It’s just one of those crazy things that I’ve always thought would be fun to try. I’m probably just thinking about it more because I haven’t picked my next project. Once I do, things will go back to normal.”
“You’ll be fine, I promise. Now tell me all about this doctor you’re dating, I’ve been dying to hear all the details.”
***
When I get home that night, I’m exhausted, frustrated, and embarrassed. All I want to do is sink into Alexis and forget that today even happened.
So, when she walks out of her room to greet me, I waste no time hauling her up and locking our lips together. She doesn’t hesitate to return my kiss, eagerly wrapping her legs around my waist and opening to me. I pull back just for a moment, “I know we need to talk, and we will, but right now I just need you.”
“Ok,” she whispers, pulling my lips back down to hers as we tumble onto the bed. Despite everything being shit, I know I’m right where I’m meant to be.