32. Jason
With my days spent spinning my wheels while Alexis sleeps, I really took time to consider what she said. At first, I wanted to completely disregard what she was suggesting, but I forced myself to listen. It”s scary to think about taking a break from your career after two decades, but I don”t know what else to do at this point.
I”m tempted to call my parents and ask them if they”ve ever felt this way, but I can”t seem to hit the call button. I crave their advice, but I”m also terrified of disappointing them. So, I”m paralyzed on that front.
Instead, I hang out with Slinky during the day, keeping us quiet so that Alexis isn”t woken up. And at night, I sleep in her bed, wishing she was next to me. Slinky doesn”t let me sleep alone, though, so it isn”t too bad. It”s funny, aside from when her parents were here, we”ve never stayed at my place. And it”s not from a lack of not wanting to share it; I just don”t care to. Alexis” apartment quickly became home for me, and now when I”m in my apartment, all I can think is that we should just move in together. I don”t want us separated any more than necessary, and having two apartments leaves that open. Once she”s off these shifts, I”ll talk to her about it.
I hear the door open and close just as I”m serving breakfast.
“Do I smell bacon?”
”You sure do, Sweet Cheeks.” I smile, feeling that familiar clench in my chest when she enters the kitchen. Doesn”t matter how long it”s been since I last had eyes on her; I always miss her when we”re apart. ”Take a seat; I”ll bring you a plate.”
She sits at the table, scooping up Slinky, who is delighted to be getting chin scratches. Alexis sighs when I set the plate full of bacon, scrambled eggs, and French toast. ”This looks amazing. Come here, I need a kiss.” You don”t have to tell me twice.
I lean down and capture her lips with mine. I keep it quick, knowing she’s super hungry and that if I go any longer, we’ll be ignoring our food in favor of getting each other naked. Food first, sex later.
”How was your last overnight? Nothing crazy, I hope?”
She shrugs, mouth full of bacon and eggs. Even with a mouth full of food, she turns me on. Goddamn, she”s cute.
”It wasn”t too bad. We had a bad car accident come in, but luckily, we were able to get both patients stable.” She takes another bite of food, then washes it down with orange juice. ”Honestly, I”m just dreading these next couple of days of on-call. I hate when I have a short stint in overnight and then am on-call. My sleep schedule is always super off for a while afterward, and it seems like a dumb system. Maybe once I”m an attending, I can get them to change that.”
“Have they asked you yet? To be an attending in a few months.”
She shrugs again. ”Not officially, but it”s not surprising. I think they”re waiting to see if I start looking for other positions before making any moves. I”m not overly worried. If they don”t want me, plenty of other hospitals need a good ER doctor.” Her confidence never ceases to amaze me.
Once we”ve inhaled our food, I send her to the bathroom to shower while I clean up the dishes. Usually, we split cooking and washing more equitably, but I can tell she”s exhausted. She has about five hours off before she”s officially on-call, and I want her to rest as much as possible.
We’re cuddling on the couch; Alexis is drifting when my phone dings.
Steven:Dude, you’ve dodged me long enough. I’ll be at Holden Forrest’s party tonight. You need to come so we can talk. This isn’t a request.
Fuck. Steven”s a top agent and a busy man. Clearly, I”ve tested his patience to the breaking point. And while I would love to continue to ignore him, I know I need to grow up and face this head-on.
“Who was that?” Her voice is sleepy, rumbling through my chest, “I felt your whole body tense.”
”It was Steven. He wants me to find him at a party tonight and talk.” I sigh, wishing I could skip.
“Have you decided what you want to do?” She rubs my chest, clearly trying to soothe my distress.
“Kind of. I think you’re right; I need to take a break. But it’s still scary to think about. I just know that I need to get him off my back for a while so I can get my head straight.”
She nods against my chest, then plants a kiss over my heart.
“Will you go with me tonight?”
”I”m on-call; I really shouldn”t.”
”I know, but I promise I won”t drink, and I”ll leave the second you get a call. Holden”s place is actually pretty close to the hospital, so it won”t take us long to get there if you”re called in.”
When she hesitates, I put on my best puppy dog eyes, not above begging. ”Please? I really need you there with me; I don”t think I”ll have the courage to tell him without you.”
She blows out a breath and stays silent for a moment, chewing on her lip. ”Fine, but we”re leaving the second I get a call. Even if you”re in the middle of telling Steven where he can shove it.”
I can’t help but chuckle, such a way with words. “Absolutely. Thank you.”