Chapter 3 – Clawdia
CHAPTER 3
CLAWDIA
CHAPTER 3 - CLAWDIA
S tretching as the morning light streamed through the window into the small wooden room, I came aware of my position in the bed. With my head lying on top of Baelen’s chest, I had a leg thrown over his and his hand curled into my hair.
The possessive gesture made me smile, and I nuzzled into his chest, relishing in the warm, male scent of him. Like iron and wood. A spark of arousal roused my sleepy mind, and I pressed a gentle kiss to his skin as I stroked his arm and rubbed my legs against his.
It was then I realized I was naked.
And human.
With a gasp, I jumped, waking Baelen almost instantly. His red eyes shot open, his body wrapped around me protectively, and he hissed as he searched for the danger that made me react so abruptly. So relieved to be human again, I relaxed into his arms and soothed him with gentle strokes on his chest.
When his gaze returned to mine, the confusion clear on his expression, he began, “Clawdia, what …” My smile stretched slowly across my face as clarity made his eyes widen and he exclaimed, “You’re human again.”
He leaned in to hug me. One hand pressed me to his body, and the other curled into my hair. I nuzzled into his neck and let my hands roam across his strong shoulders and back.
“I’m sorry,” he whispered. I knew exactly what he was talking about.
I pulled back but held his face as I stared him dead in the eyes. The sorrow in them made my heart ache. “Don’t be sorry. You shouldn’t be sorry for anything because you did nothing wrong.”
His jaw clenched in my hands. “I abandoned Zaide to his fate after promising I’d keep you and Charlie safe. I failed you all,” he ended in a whisper.
“You said that yesterday. But the shadow possessed you. How could you have kept a promise or saved Zaide?” I smoothed his hair back and ducked my head to meet his gaze again. “Please don’t blame yourself for anything that’s happened. We are all just doing our best.”
His eyes searched mine for something. “You truly hold me faultless?”
“How much of our … intimate moment … was the shadow involved in?”
I already knew what I’d hear, because the eyes that stared hungrily at me as he licked my core had been his. My Baelen’s. But I needed to prove to him he did his best to help us when he couldn’t help himself, and the important moments were ours, even if an interloper had witnessed them.
As I thought he would, Baelen recoiled and rushed to assure me. “None of that was him. That was us. It was my bloodlust and thankfully pulled me wholly into my body. I tried to keep him as far away from you all as I could.”
“I know,” I told him in an earnest whisper. His dark waves flopping over his shoulder to shroud us, and my fingers twitched with the need to brush it back. I didn’t resist for long. “Despite having your body taken from you, you protected us as much as you could.”
He mirrored me, combing my hair back and running his thumb across my lips. With only that small motion, all the anxiety swirling in my stomach turned to butterflies, and my heart raced as he tipped my head back with his thumb on my chin, and his eyes warmed as they gazed at my face.
“So understanding. Trusting,” he murmured.
Sweet words that should have melted me, but I wanted to grimace. Trusting, yes. Almost to the point of naivety if I considered the situation with Karin. Despite my suspicions of her and despite consuming spells through trickery before, I still took the tea.
No one to blame but yourself.
But I didn’t mention that. This wasn’t about me. It was about Baelen, and he needed someone on his side.
I licked my lips and whispered, “I know we haven’t known each other long, but I trust and believe in you. You’re my soul mate. You are a protective and strong man. It must have killed you to be in that situation, so I don’t blame you for anything. I just want you to heal now.”
After a long pause, he nodded once, his jaw tight with tension. His voice wavered when he spoke. “It was … violating. Watching things unfold. Knowing his plan and being helpless to stop him. It was the first time in my life I’ve felt so …”
He seemed unable to conjure the right word, and my heart lurched at the pain in his voice. I squeezed him, and although we were both naked and his body felt marvelous against mine, any desires we shared had cooled with our serious conversation.
Baelen lay back, bringing me with him so I straddled his legs and covered his chest, my head buried in his neck.
Not being able to see him made it easier to say, “When my husband, Mr Jenkins—or Fafnir, as we now know—attempted to force himself on me, it was the most traumatic, painful, and violating experience of my life. I felt so useless and empty and angry and heartbroken. Unclean. Ruined. He didn’t get far, but he could have easily, and I knew he would try again. It broke something inside me, so much so that I took my own life to escape him.”
Baelen stayed silent but tightened his arms around me and let out slow, controlled breaths.
I kissed his neck in thanks and continued, “I’m not telling you our situations are alike or that I know exactly how you feel. They aren’t, and I don’t. But I know how alone I felt, and I don’t want you to feel like that. If you want to talk, if you don’t, I’m here all the same.”
“Thank you, Sunlight,” was all I heard in reply, but his voice seemed choked, and his arms didn’t loosen, so I know he heard me and felt my care for him.
After a few moments of peacefully breathing each other in, I figured he didn’t want to talk yet and added, “I’ll never forget those feelings, but I can be thankful it’s over and that it led me to you, Charlie, and Zaide. I’m so sorry you suffered, but I’m glad it meant you were portaled here. I don’t know what I’d do if I didn’t have you right now.”
He kissed the top of my head and said, “I am glad to be here too. And that you are human again. Interpreting your meows was not a challenge I’ve trained for.”
Thrilled he was lightening the mood with a joke, I played along, patting his shoulder in mock sympathy. “It’s an acquired skill to speak feline. Very few are bestowed with the knowledge, so I applaud your efforts.”
“Bestowed …” he repeated as his fingers glided over my back and down my sides, tickling me softly. “How might one earn such a gift?”
“I have to admit, you aren’t going the right way about it,” I huffed before squirming out of his grip and sitting up. “We should probably get out of bed.”
Baelen glanced toward the window. “It’s still early, and Elizabeth isn’t up yet.” When his gaze turned back to me, dark and hungry eyes lingered on my breasts. Calloused hands gripped my hips. “And you are naked.”
He licked his lips as his stare washed over my stomach and then to where my core touched his legs, his large and pulsating arousal a tower between us. All the desire we’d put aside came flooding back.
“Cats do not wear pajamas to bed,” I replied breathlessly as he pulled me onto his lap to grind against his dripping hardness.
“How fortunate,” he whispered before he tugged me down and caressed my lips with whisper-soft pecks, which grew into passionate kisses.
His cock jumped when I bit his lip, and I gasped and groaned, my head falling to his neck, as it hit me exactly where I wanted it. Pleasure caused everything to clench and white sparks to fly behind my closed eyes.
He likes being bitten, but does he bite?
“Baelen?” I whispered as he peppered my neck with kisses and moved my hips more firmly against his cock.
“Yes, my sunlight?”
“Do you bite? When you …” I trailed off, my cheeks burning as his eyebrow raised and he looked up at me with a grin and undisguised laughter in his red eyes. I huffed at the mockery and said, “Forget I asked.”
He held me still on top of him and answered seriously, “I’ve only been with akari females, and we do not bite or exchange blood unless we are making commitments to each other.”
My brow furrowed. The thought of him being sexually intimate with anyone else, let alone making commitments, made me angry. “I don’t want to know any more.”
His lips twitched, and I glared. “Don’t be jealous, my sunlight. I promise you, I can’t even remember them.”
“Them?” I asked incredulously until I remembered I was currently in a relationship with three men and couldn’t really say anything. Still, I sat up and crossed my arms as a green haze of jealousy descended upon me. “That doesn’t make me feel better.”
He stroked my arms, trying to make me uncover myself again. “What can I do?”
“If you don’t know the answer to that, then I feel sorry for those other women.” I huffed and looked away from him.
I might be human again, but the catty feline was still very much a part of me. The silent treatment was part of my DNA.
He sat up and hugged me. My crossed arms were the only barrier from being plastered across his chest. “You’re only upsetting yourself by dwelling on it. I’m here with you, now and forevermore. You are my soul mate. And were you not, I’d still find you to be the most enchanting familiar I’ve ever met.”
I sagged a little as his buttery words softened me up. I replied poutily, “You’ve never met another familiar.”
His fangs brushed the edge of my ear, and I shivered as he whispered, “Unless you want me to put that mouth to better use, I suggest you stop pouting.”
A flash of heat rushed through me, and I almost moaned at the images his words provoked.
“Maybe that’s what I want,” I told him in a breathy whisper. “Maybe I want you to fuck my mouth so you forget all the others.”
His sharp inhale was all the warning I had before his lips ravished mine until I was gasping, quivering, and rocking against his cock, desperately seeking the relief my body craved.
Baelen pulled away, and I was confused for a moment until he spoke in a fevered whisper. “No one has ever done that for me. Fangs don’t allow for pleasurable oral.”
I blinked away the fog of desire clouding my memories. “But you … for me.”
“For males.”
I nodded slowly and then a smile creeped over my face and I wiggled with excitement. I am going to be a first for him. Me. This experience will always be mine in his mind.
Running my hands through the hair on his chiseled chest and pressing wet kisses to his stomach, I crawled my way down his body. His manhood stood proudly, the veins throbbing and his tip red and beaded with pre-cum. I salivated with the need to taste him and gently licked the bead away.
He groaned, his eyes narrowed to slits as he stared down at me, desire clear in his darkened cheeks. His body tensed as the taste of sweet iron mixed with my own arousal overwhelmed my senses. I followed the vein from his balls, which were high and tight against his body, to his tip. His breathing hitch.
I swallowed him as deep as I could, until he hit the back of my throat, which clenched automatically and tears pricked my eyes. And despite being uncomfortable, I loved the feel of him in my mouth. I loved giving this experience to him. I loved every gasp and jolt he made, as though he couldn’t help himself because the pleasure was too much.
I sucked on the tip, and he made a pained moan, his eyes closed and his fists clenched at his side. The power I felt was heady, and I smiled around him as I cupped his balls and massaged them.
“Clawdia,” he groaned. “Sunlight, I’m going to …”
“Do it,” I told him in a low voice. “I want you to come in my mouth.”
And just as I pulled him back into my mouth, he jolted, and the taste of his cum hit the back of my throat. I swallowed as much as I could, but as I pulled away, a mix of saliva and cum dripped from my lips. I licked and wiped it away as I stared at him expectantly.
Baelen didn’t move. He was so still that if I couldn’t see his chest rise and fall, I would have thought he’d died. I shifted on my knees as I watched and waited for his reaction.
“Are … Are you all right?” I asked in a whisper.
His breath caught in his throat. “Sunlight …” My gut clenched. Did I do it wrong? “You have ruined me.”
“Ruined you?” I wasn’t what I expected him to say, and his lack of movement or physical affection after such an intimate moment made me uncomfortable, unnerved. It was wrong to compare, but Zaide and Charlie were both very touchy after they climaxed.
Perhaps it is an akari thing?
With my mouth twisted down and my arms wrapped around myself, I tried to stop the coldness from seeping into my skin. Finally, he sat up and saw my hesitancy. He pulled me into his chest and pressed kisses into my hair and on my forehead.
“That was … otherworldly. I had to take a moment to marvel at my blessings when the Fates gave us to each other.”
I relaxed at his words but muttered a disgruntled, “Next time, could you marvel with me in your arms? I don’t enjoy feeling … alone.”
He laughed and squeezed me. “Of course. Forgive me. My previous partners didn’t cuddle.”
“I thought we’d forgotten about them,” I retorted. When he only chuckled and didn’t immediately reply, I nudged him and asked, “Why didn’t they cuddle?”
He coughed and hesitated before eventually admitting, “They were … tied up.”
I frowned and peered up at him. “Tied up with what?”
Who’s busy after intimacy? There’s time for sex but not for cuddles?
His lips twitched, and his red eyes were bright with amusement. “Rope.”
I blinked, then coughed and looked away as heat rushed to my cheeks. “Oh. Well. Why didn’t they cuddle when they were freed from the rope?”
He raised an eyebrow. “I’ve never shared a bed with another. I didn’t have that kind of attachment.”
A smug smile overtook my face, and I ducked my head to hide it. Another first. Mine.
“I can see how much that pleases you, my sunlight.” He chuckled as he brushed the hair out of my face. “Who knew you were so possessive?”
“You seem to bring out that side of me.” I pursed my lips and narrowed my eyes as I stared at him. “You don’t seem the Fifty Shades of Gray type.”
But what did I know about him? He was my soul mate, the son of titan gods, and an akari prophet. Savior of titans. Leader of an army. How did he spend his days? Where? With whom? What was his favorite color? Did he have any interesting quirks? There was so much to learn about him.
“What?” His dark brows pulled down in a confused frown.
“I just didn’t know you liked …” I waved a hand. “That. Is it the … control you enjoy? Did I upset you just now by doing as I wanted?”
His lips slowly curved, and he caressed my hip so lightly, I shivered. “No, Sunlight. That was perfect. It’s not about control. It’s … the aesthetic.”
“You like women to look like a trussed-up piece of meat?” I asked skeptically.
He burst into laughter, his whole body shaking as he howled. I couldn’t help but laugh with him, my heart light to see him so free and happy, unguarded and unburdened. We had to take every opportunity to enjoy the moment.
“I suppose I do,” he finally responded.
“I dare not ask how you discovered this. I don’t think I’d recover,” I mumbled, which set him off laughing again.
I wasn’t thinking about the other women. Not really. I pictured myself bared to him, tied up and my breath caught. I bit my lip.
Baelen’s laughter quieted, and his red eyes darkened with desire. Just like in the myths of vampires, I felt hypnotized, like I was falling into him. My eyes followed the shape of his lips as they moved.
“If you don’t want to be a trussed-up piece of meat, my sunlight, you don’t need to be. But you might find the feeling of being restricted an … erotic one.”
I considered that and finally nodded. “Charlie held my hands one time while Zaide … licked me. Being caught between them was … something.”
“What I would have given to see that,” Baelen muttered, a fire in his eyes as he trailed a finger over the soft tissue of my breast.
“Next time,” I replied rather breathlessly. Licking my lips, I watched him stare at my skin as his touch made it pebble.
“This is what I like,” he told me in a low, seductive voice. “I like your reactions. I like when your skin pricks and blood rushes to the surface. Combined with the smell of lust that pours from you …”
He rolled me onto my back and ran his nose down my neck, breathing me in, before scraping his fangs over my breast. My chest heaved, and the moan I let out was involuntary when he kissed my nipple.
“Irresistible.” His smug smile was beastly. “If you let me, I’ll tie you in knots that restrain you.” He gripped my wrist. “I can tease you with knots that will make you squirm against them, desperate for relief.”
I shivered. “Why do I find the idea of that so … appealing?”
“Because you are perfect for me.” He kissed my other nipple, which was begging for attention. “But it’s not time to introduce you to all that.”
“What? Why?” I moaned.
He chuckled. “No rope.” I sighed. As his hair flopped forward into his face, it hid his crooked grin. “But it would be cruel not to reward you for such a fantastic job.”
And as his lips descended upon me, I forgot what was awaiting me. I forgot my stress and worry over Charlie’s disappearance and my fear for Zaide. I forgot we should plan how to deal with both problems.
He dipped his fingers between my legs, swiping through my wetness and caressing my clit. “You are so wet, my sunlight. So ready for me.”
I nodded and bit my lip to prevent a lusty moan escaping as he curled a finger inside me and stroked. “So ready. Please, Baelen.”
“Please what?” While his teasing grin would have ordinarily annoyed me, I was too lost in my want for him and wasn’t ashamed to beg for it.
I still couldn’t feel my bond with Charlie, and with Zaide’s bond being devastatingly quiet, I missed the usually imperceptible buzz of our connections. A cold draught seemed to blow through me with their absence.
Since being reborn in this world, I hadn’t been without a soul bond. So, if Baelen would have me, I was going to take him. I needed our bond, and I wanted my soul mate. Now and forever.
“Please fuck me. I need to feel you. I want you inside me.”