Chapter 44
Chapter Forty-Four
Romy
I step off the airplane—the private plane that Zander paid to take me home because apparently, he’s done with me as soon as I challenge him.
DeSoto takes my suitcase, and I walk toward the small terminal where the private flights come in. But Lottie springs out the door and barrels toward me, hugging me so hard I stumble back. I look over her shoulder to see Poppy and my mom right behind her.
“Finally, you’re home. You know how boring this ranch has been without you?” Lottie says.
She’s dodging the reason I’m home. Someone called her because I sure as hell didn’t. And my guess is it was Beau—making sure somebody was here to pick up the pieces that Zander crumbled under his boot.
“I’m sure you survived fine. I’ll bet Brooks kept you busy.”
“Barely.” She pulls back and looks me over. “How are you doing?” Her eyes turn grim, and I guess she’s done. I give her credit for trying though.
“I’m fine.” Tears sting my eyes again, and I wipe them away. Poor DeSoto had to sit next to me the entire plane ride, handing me tissues and disposing of the old ones when they piled too high. “I don’t want to cry anymore, so let’s just… like… not talk about it.”
Poppy steps forward, giving me a big hug. “Just when I was starting to like him. Now I gotta go bash him online.”
“Don’t you dare go be a keyboard warrior,” I say.
“Some of those people are so nasty, they need to be put in their place.”
Beau had a whole conversation with Poppy and Lottie about staying off the comments sections last time he was at the ranch. He told them they’re just making it worse, but neither one has stopped telling off people who say shitty things about Zander or me online.
“No, Poppy,” my mom says in her motherly tone. “We’re thinking about changing all the Wi-Fi passwords and cutting her cell signal.”
Poppy shrugs unapologetically.
“How are you, sweetheart?” My mom steps forward, swallowing me in a hug. “It’s okay.” She runs her hand over my back, and the tears I’ve been pushing back set free. “I know it’s hard. Heartbreak is never easy.”
Once I collect myself, we all file out of the airport.
At the curb is a black SUV—tinted out—another thing Zander’s paying for. DeSoto opens the door for all of us to get in, puts my bag in the back, and sits up front with the driver.
Memories of being in the back seat of a similar SUV with Zander so many times surface. How easy and carefree it was. How I fell in love with him. And now it’s over. Because we can’t braid our two lives together.
We drive back toward Willowbrook. The Nebraska land is pretty much the same—stretching wide, winter fields. Nothing growing. Everything dead, just like me on the inside.
“So, you’re never gonna believe what happened,” Lottie starts a story, trying to lift my mood.
I’m only half paying attention because I’m staring out the window, wondering where Zander is right now and if he’s okay. I want so badly to message Beau and ask where they are and how he’s doing.
My stomach twists, and I have no idea what conversation is going on around me. It could be about pictures of me pregnant hitting the media for all I know. I haven’t even looked at my phone to see the fallout of my impulsive decision.
But I don’t regret it. I couldn’t live like that anymore. I couldn’t live in secret, hiding all the time. I don’t care if paps bother me. I don’t care if they know. I don’t care about anything except what I’ve lost.
I know that’s probably na?ve of me. Zander would think I’m being foolish. But at this point, I can’t find it in myself to care.
I run my hands over my stomach, thinking about how I’m ever going to make this work with him. How I’ll ever do normal drop-offs and pick-ups for our son with him and not think to myself, could we have made it work? We could have had one hell of a life together.
I’ll still want Zander every time he comes to pick up our son. Or will he send Beau because he doesn’t have the guts to look me in the eye? Will Uncle Beau be the go-between? Maybe we’ll never actually be face-to-face again.
I’ll probably just see pictures of Zander online here and there. Will he try to keep our son locked up as well?
A hand rests on my leg. I look over at my mom. She shakes her head as if she knows my thoughts are spinning out of control, and I’m moving ten paces forward instead of staying in the here and now.
Once the SUV pulls up to my parents’ house on the ranch, we all file out. DeSoto’s clearly been instructed to stay with me until further instruction.
My mom raises her hand at him. “Okay, DeSoto. You’re staying here, and I’m taking my daughter with me.”
DeSoto looks at my mom, knowing there’s no arguing with her, and he nods. But I have no doubt he’ll be hopping in his own UTV and following a couple yards back.
“Mom, I don’t want to go anywhere. I just want to go to my bed and lie down,” I say.
“Well, I’m sorry, Romy. Everybody has to do things they don’t want to do. You’re getting in the UTV, and we’re going to Daisy Hill.”
Lottie laughs behind me. “What analogy are you gonna use for her, Mom?”
My mom shakes her head. “Get in, Romy. It’s time.”
“What does that mean? It’s time?” I look back at Lottie.
“It’s the weed talk. You’re gonna get the weed talk.” Lottie grins.
“But I didn’t do anything wrong. Are you suggesting I did?” I cross my arms and rest them on my bump.
Lottie shrugs. “Can you tell us one thing we were talking about on the ride back?” She cringes as though she’s sorry, but she’s taking Mom’s side on this one.
“Let’s get this over with,” I mutter.
So I climb into the UTV, knowing my mom won’t let up. I’ll have her stupid talk, then I’m going home to wallow.