29. Gemma
29
Gemma
I don’t know what to think. My heart is lodged in my throat and breathing around it is taking all of my effort. I am boiling with anger at his words but at the same time my heart is breaking. I don’t even realize at first that I have tears streaming down my cheek. I wipe them away quickly in an effort to hide them but when I look up at him, his cheeks are just as wet as mine.
This whole time, this whole damn time I wanted to hate him. I just knew I was the idiot. He was just another asshole who fooled me into falling for him just to walk away and move on to the next girl. But no, this whole damn time he thought he wasn’t good enough for me. He thought he was going to break me or something. That is what is breaking me. The thought of him feeling like he’s a villain is absolutely breaking my heart. He may be rough around the edges, but he is not a villain. Not in my story.
I have to fight the urge to slap him again. I want to scream and yell. I want to make him understand how fucking stupid he is. But I can’t. I feel my anger slipping and all that it is leaving in its wake is fear and sadness. It is dangerous territory. But Brooks is here in front of me. He is okay, well he is going to be okay. Everything is going to be okay. But I refuse to pretend anymore. For once, I know what I want. I am done giving a fuck what anyone else thinks about who I should be.
“You don’t get to decide my life for me Brooks Sterling,” I say sternly. “No one gets to decide my life but me. I’m done fitting in everyone else’s boxes and trying to keep everyone else happy. It’s time to make me happy. And you know what? Whether you like it or not, you make me happy. A life with you in this town on that ranch is what I want my future to hold. And I know that sounds like crazy talk but so be it and...”
It is Brooks’ turn to stop me. “Gemma, take a breath. Do I get to say something?”
I cross my arms and look at him expectantly.
“The moment I saw your face in here I knew I couldn’t let you leave again. I’m fucking in love with you.”
My breath catches in my throat as I choke out, “Oh Brooks. I am fucking in love with you too.”
Brooks looks uncertain and relieved at the same time. But yet, I’m not worried that he is uncertain about his feelings for me. I think he is uncertain about admitting them. Whoops and hollers from the hallway fill the room.
His face morphs into pure shock. “What the hell?”
Just then, the door opens, and a very excited Olivia runs into the room to hug me. Brooks’ face softens so he must recognize Liv from all of the FaceTime calls I made him be a part of. But right behind her is Mason and his face is once again confused.
I can feel the sheepish grin take over my face. “I was a bit of a mess when Lor told me what happened. Olivia refused to let me drive myself. But she wanted to let me confront you alone, so she’s been waiting outside in the hall." I give her the side eye. "Apparently with her ear against the door.”
Brooks turns to look at Olivia. “I can’t thank you enough then, Olivia. Also, it’s nice to finally meet you.” When Oliva flashes him a quick smile, he turns to look at Mason. “And what the hell is your goofy ass doing here instead of work?”
Mason lets out a loud barking laugh. “First of all, its supper time, Sleeping Beauty. Second of all, my goofy ass is who found your dumb ass and called 9-1-1. So, I followed the ambulance and stayed to make sure you were okay. You’re welcome.”
Brooks smiles guiltily. “Well fuck, I guess I need to extend a heartfelt thanks and maybe a big ol’ apology to you too. I’ll buy ya a beer when I’m outa here.”
“Let’s take our time before we mix you with alcohol again. You only have one arm left. And Gemma looks like she would enjoy you in one piece.”
“Alright smart ass,” Brooks agrees. “Deal.”