Chapter 2 The Summer I Liked Him Most
The summer I liked Ji Chuan the most felt like the darkest stretch I’d lived through.
Right before the winter break of my sophomore year, there was a high school reunion.
I packed my luggage while trying not to check whether Ji Chuan had replied to my message.
He hadn’t.
Instead he added someone new to the group chat.
“What’s going on?”
“Who’s this?”
Friends in the group teased.
Ji Chuan said: “My girlfriend.”
The three words exploded in my head.
I knew Ji Chuan never lacked admirers, but he always acted aloof.
So aloof that I let myself hold onto a tiny hope.
I clicked on his girlfriend’s profile picture.
She was very pretty.
I sat in the dorm, put on full makeup, then wiped it all off—everything looked terrible anyway.
When I finally reached the reunion spot, everyone inside was laughing loudly.
The moment I appeared, the laughter stopped.
Ji Chuan stood up right then to give his girlfriend his seat.
He leaned toward me, one eyebrow raised.
“Lin Xia Yi, what the hell is that makeup?”
Just normal friend-teasing tone.
Exactly the same as always.
The difference was me.
Self-loathing flooded out until I didn’t know where to put myself.
Everyone burst into laughter again.
I forced a laugh too, trying to cover the embarrassment.
“What’s so funny?”
His girlfriend pulled me out of the private room and into the restroom.
She wiped off my patchy foundation and asked while cleaning,
“Ji Chuan is too mean. I’ll get back at him for you later.”
Her hands smelled nice. Her skin was soft.
She was so gentle even I couldn’t help liking her.
How much more would he like her?
That night I trailed behind the crowd and watched Ji Chuan hold her hand.
They looked perfect together.
Later in the reunion someone suggested drinks.
Ji Chuan refused.
His girlfriend slid into the driver’s seat of his fancy car.
I turned to follow the others, but Ji Chuan grabbed me and stuffed me into the back seat.
“Don’t pick up bad habits,” he said with a smile in his eyes, “your mom would kill me if she found out.”
“Yeah,” his girlfriend added, “we’ll drop you at school.”
Halfway there his girlfriend wanted crayfish.
She turned to me. “Want to come eat with us?”
Ji Chuan held the wheel with one hand and looked at me in the rearview mirror. His mouth tightened just a fraction, eyes flicking away fast.
“You guys go ahead.”
He still dropped me at school first.
Before I got out, I heard his girlfriend ask quietly,
“Should I come to your apartment tonight?”
The inky night of Beijing poured cold wind through the window. Her soft words scraped clearly across my ear.
His car sped away.
I stood there remembering the night in sophomore year of high school when Ji Chuan rode his bike and waited downstairs at my building.
Back then I imagined—if one day he drove a car,
how it would feel to sit in his passenger seat.
Now I knew.