22. Autumn
Autumn
I love the days where I don’t get left behind.
Where I can come visit Summy, too.
I don’t get to go to school like Wynnie. Because I’m special.
I have to save Summy’s life.
She’s sick. And I’m the only one who can make her feel better. I was born to do it. To save her life.
To give her the parts of me I don’t need.
So I have to be healthy. But I don’t care about eating veggies all the time. And I read to Wynnie, and she’s the smartest girl ever, so I don’t need school.
But I need Summy.
I’m sitting in her lap. We’re both in her bed in the hospital. All her hair is gone, so she likes to play with mine. She braids it and puts beads in it.
Wynnie and Summy look just alike. They both have freckles and orange hair, like Nana.
But Summy always tells me I’m her favorite little sister. She always saves her jello for me, and always tells me how much she loves me.
She says I’m the wind beneath her wings. I love it when she says it.
“What are you thinking about, Auty?” she asks me.
I lean back into her and look up her nose. “You.”
She pokes my nose and smiles.
Mommy explained our names when we first started writing them.
She said Wynnie came out her tummy as pale, so she’s Wynter Snow.
She said I came out her tummy and didn’t cry. I was quiet like how it is at night. So I’m Autumn Night.
And Summy? Summy was the most beautiful baby in the hospital. Pretty like a warm summer day, she says. So she’s Summer Dae.
And I see it every time she smiles at me. Like when the sun smiles at me.
Nurse Tammy comes in and puts her hands on her hips. “What’s my homegirl doing here?”
“You know it’s Wednesday, so the Shaws are at the casino trying to get some money for a new trial.” Summy rolls her eyes, like she always does when she talks about Mommy or Daddy.
Nurse Tammy shakes her head and looks at me. “You want some jello baby girl?”
I nod, and she winks at me before leaving.
“When I grow up, I’ma be a doctor so I can save other girls, Summy.”
Summy kisses my head. “Nah, doctors always have to give out bad news. Be a nurse, Auty. They have way more fun, like how Nurse Tammy eats jello with us.”
I nod because Summy’s right. Nurse Tammy is way better than Summy’s doctor. And I wanna be able to eat jello, too.
Present
So many detours. Life got in the way more often than not. I didn’t go to college straight out of high school. Shit, I barely graduated high school. I started dancing, working my way up to being a certified moneymaker at Paradise, and I admit, that shit got addicting.
Having Deuce sat me down. Since I couldn’t dance anymore, I enrolled in online classes. I became an EMT and one of my old regulars hooked me up with a job at Memorial.
I clawed my way to the top. Community college classes. Transferring to a BSN program. And now, I’m done with all my hours.
I can come home.
Of course I have to pass the NCLEX, but I can study at home, where my people need me.
I just have to do one last thing before I go.
It’s early in the morning, and a shift change at the clinic. There’s that bitch that stayed doing the most over me. Giving me so much attitude and for what?
Walking to her car, not having a care in the world. Probably going to stop and get breakfast before going home to some shitty apartment and shitty boyfriend.
I take one last look around and when I’m satisfied no one is this far in the parking lot, I walk up to her and tap her shoulder.
She turns around, face settling onto annoyance when she sees it’s me. “I thought you left already.”
I smile, showing off the perfectly straight teeth thousands of dollars worth of orthodontics got me. “I just needed to tell you something.”
She rolls her eyes and shifts her weight onto her other foot. “What is it?” she snaps.
I smile wider before uppercutting her like my name was Scott Pilgrim. The bitch falls to the ground in a heap, knocked out cold.
A heady combination of dopamine and adrenaline flood my veins and my nipples get hard.
Sheesh, that was amazing.
So much pent up frustration went into that punch, and it barely scratched the surface. But it was enough to get me to my destination, and that’ll do for now.
I jog back to my car and start the engine. The clinic I worked at was underfunded, and spent the money they would have used for security cameras on something else, so it’ll be her word against mine, but that’s a risk I’m willing to take.
That's for everyone else I should have knocked out but didn’t.
Four hours later I’m pulling up to my favorite house in Raleigh Park. By habit, I look next door to my childhood home. The new owners have repainted it, and planted some rose bushes like that’ll take away from the crime in the neighborhood.
Alas, it’s still got a For Rent sign in the lawn.
I take out my key and unlock the door. Mouthwatering smells of sweet cornbread and chili greet me, and I damn near float to the kitchen.
Two of my favorite people are sitting at the breakfast nook. My sister, and G-Pops.
His eyes soften when he turns to me. I put my purse down and rush to him, but he slides out his seat and meets me some of the way, enveloping me in a hug.
Leroy Atkins cared about me when no one else did. He paid Renelle to watch us when our parents checked out. He taught me how to shoot. He paid the first three months of my apartment when I was kicked out.
He was the first adult that believed I was worth more than my organs.
“I knew you could do it,” he grumbles and I hug him tighter.
“I knew she was your favorite,” Wyn snaps, making me giggle.
G-Pops kisses me on the temple and moves to start making me a bowl while I sit in the empty chair. “Don’t hate.”
“Unh-unh, now. I don’t play favorites with none of my grands.” He sets down a healthy serving of chili with a huge square of cornbread and before he can even sit down I start mixing it together.
“Where’s Deucey? I was expecting him here.”
Wyn snorts while G-Pops frowns. “The twins done said some bullshit and he heard it, now that boy is keeping my great-grand from me. I done already banned they asses from inside, but he’s not budging.”
G-Pops may love us all equally, but his favorite great-grandchild will always be Deuce. Even when I didn't have school, he’d whisk Deucey away for fishing and camping trips, and just like he loved cooking with his father, Deuce loved being taste tester over here, too.
“You should close your daycare indefinitely, Pops. How you want me to move here but you got Bebe’s kids running around every day?”
“You gone move in here?” I ask Wyn, but she stuffs her mouth with chili.
“She needs to but you know she don’t listen to my old ass,” he huffs.
Wynter smiles and pats his hand before glancing at her vibrating phone “Maybe after my tour. This is my rideshare, though. Thanks for the meal, Pops.” She winks at me before washing out her bowl and leaving.
It isn’t until we hear the door lock that G-Pops speaks. “I’m worried, Auty.”
I wave him off, but his glare intensifies. “I’m serious. Something ain’t right with her. I mean, y’all both been two eggs short of a dozen, but this is different.”
I take a big bite of my food to give me some time to think. Last time I was really around Wyn, she was drinking a lot, but she didn't seem to be under the influence just now.
“Maybe she’s just been stressed because of the Shad and Cochise thing? The blogs said her and Cochise broke up. You know how Wyn gets when she’s heartbroken. You’ve bailed us out before.”
G-Pops cuts his eyes to me before folding his arms. “Yeah, okay. Since we on that subject, you mind telling me what you, Turkey, and Patience are doing?”
A piece of cornbread goes down the wrong pipe, but I cough up the crumbs and choke it down. I’m not proud to say I’ve been keeping G-Pops’s calls brief for this very reason.
I know most people wouldn’t get our dynamic. Hell, we haven’t ironed out all the details yet. Years ago people stopped asking me and Turk about each other, but it seems like they’re firing up the questions again, and just like before, I don’t really have an answer.
Especially now that Set’s still in the hospital, Pay’s somewhere in East Kenton, and I’m not exactly answering Turk’s calls.
“When I know, I’ll tell you. How about that?”
He smirks, and instantly looks like an older Turk.
Our conversation moves onto lighter topics, like his bingo nights and crazy stories from the ER.
He’s fully engaged, listening to me tell tales of dildos stuck in butts, burns from cooking naked, but it’s the story I tell of a little girl who had marbles stuck in her nose that has G-Pops chuckling.
“I remember when Wynter got that dime stuck in her nose.” He takes a swig of his coffee and shakes his head.
“Renelle came over just as terrified as she was. They both didn’t know what to do, especially when little Wyn started whistling when she breathed.
You were the only one who kept calm. You said you were training to be a nurse… and now here you are, about to be one.”
I swallow my food and smile. “I don’t even remember that.”
“No, you guys have lived a million lives since then. But you stuck to your guns and now we have a nurse in the family. I’m proud of you, Auty.”
My eyeballs start getting moist so I blink a few times. I preen in the light of his praise, like I do any time someone other than Turk tells me they’re proud of me.
Especially someone who knows how far I’ve come.
“Maybe now you’ll stop being so hard on yourself.”
And that’s when I get up.
“I’ll talk to Turkey about letting Deucey come back,” I say after hugging G-Pops. He grumbles and waves me off, but I peep the smirk before he takes another sip of his coffee.
A text-free sent me an address in Lightning Heights with a picture of my baby cheesing. Any other time I’d have to be on some Taken shit, but that’s just how annoying Turkey is.
That’s why I don’t care about blocking him. It don’t do anything but let him know I’m mad. He’ll always be able to get in touch with me. I’m sure he learned how to travel via the astral plane to show up in my dreams.
Anything’s possible with his ass.