Chapter 19 #2
‘You don’t mean that.’ Hudson’s frown deepened. ‘I understand you don’t want to decide straight away. That’s why I’m going to give you time.’
‘I don’t need time.’
He shook his head, determined not to listen.
‘You’re tired and overwrought. I get that.
I hurt you and you need time to think. To punish me even.
’ He nodded, agreeing with himself as an alarm began to buzz and Hudson winced and drew his mobile from his pocket.
‘I’m sorry. I’ve got to leave. I’m on a flight to New York in a couple of hours. ’
‘What, today?’ Clara asked, stunned. Had he really expected her to agree to go back to him after such a quick chat?
Of course he had. Until recently it’s what she would have done.
He nodded. ‘I just thought – actually, your mother thought – if I came to see you personally, you’d see how much I need you. If I could stay, I would…’ His face contorted. ‘But you know how much is going on at the company. We’ve got that party to organise too.’
‘There’s nothing to do for the party,’ Clara told him.
‘Abigail’s taking care of all last-minute details.’
‘Is she?’ Clara murmured. She wasn’t angry, more resigned. If she didn’t return, the woman would probably be wearing her ring by the new year.
He flushed. ‘Only because you’re not there, otherwise…’ he trailed off, looking embarrassed. ‘I really shouldn’t be here now, but –’ He let out a sigh before nodding at the engagement ring. ‘– I hope you’ll think about what I’ve said.’
‘I—’
‘I got you a tree.’ Hudson’s eyes travelled to Eleanor’s and his mouth tightened. ‘It’s not decorated but– I thought, maybe.’ His eyes dropped and he deliberately guided them back to her face. ‘You might enjoy buying some decorations when you get back?’
Clara stared at him. This was everything she’d wanted from Hudson for so many years – and now he was delivering it in one perfect speech.
He’d chased her halfway across the globe.
Told her he’d made a mistake which was a Christmas miracle in itself.
Was she crazy for not jumping into his arms? ‘Look, I—’
Hudson pressed a fingertip to her lips. ‘Please don’t say anything.
I just want you to think about it.’ He straightened.
‘Maybe speak to your mother. She talks a lot of sense. Remember, relationships like ours don’t come along that often.
We work together, live together, our priorities are exactly the same. ’ He smiled.
Clara gazed at him. Her priority had always been him – about keeping Hudson happy, which she supposed meant they were aligned.
He gave her a bright smile. ‘Look, I’ve got to go.
I booked a taxi to pick me up in –’ He checked his Rolex and pulled a face.
‘– a few minutes. I really should be outside now.’ He pressed a hurried kiss to her forehead before grabbing his laptop bag, which he’d stashed by the edge of the sofa.
‘I look forward to seeing you in New York wearing that ring. I really think you owe it to yourself to give us another chance. Don’t forget the party on the twenty-eighth.
My mother is looking forward to seeing you there… ’
With that, he headed into the hallway leaving Clara staring at his retreating back, feeling confused.
‘Have you seen Hudson?’ Clara’s mother called after Hudson had gone. Clara was sitting on the sofa, staring at the engagement ring, twirling it between her fingers and reliving the conversation and everything she wished she’d said.
‘He left a few minutes ago,’ she replied flatly. ‘He’s on his way to the airport.’
‘And you’re not with him?’ Her mother squeaked. ‘Really, Clara – if a man flies halfway across the world to tell you he loves you, the least you can do is pack.’ Her tone was sharp.
‘He didn’t tell me he loved me – and I’m not sure I’d want to be with him even if he did.’ Perhaps she hadn’t managed to tell Hudson that yet, but she would.
‘You’re making a big mistake,’ her mother said sharply.
‘I’m sure Eleanor has made you feel like you can have anyone you want.
But the woman lives in a fantasy world filled with sparkles and all year round Christmas trees.
Tell me how long her relationships have lasted – isn’t she single right now?
If her advice is so wonderful, how come she’s alone? ’
‘The thing is, Mum, I’ve met someone,’ Clara said quietly. ‘He’s—’
‘A Christmas fling,’ her mother said firmly. ‘Nothing more. I’m sure you think he cares for you, but he doesn’t. Be realistic. Is he a patch on Hudson? Does he drive a Porsche, own a penthouse in New York and did he fly halfway across the world just to see you?’
‘Nope.’ Clara sucked in a breath and picked up one of the mince pies, feeling depressed. She bit into it, relishing the sweet pastry, the sugar as it melted on her tongue giving her a dose of much-needed comfort.
‘Then that’s all I need to know. I’m sure if you think long and hard you’ll realise I’m right. How are you getting on with the diet?’ her mother asked.
‘It’s going great,’ Clara said, taking another bite.
‘Well, that’s something,’ her mother said.
‘I advise you not to let Hudson get away. Forget whoever you think you’ve met.
Remember your fiancé came to tell you how he felt – now it’s up to you to show him you understand.
I’ll be expecting to hear that you’re back in New York soon.
Make sure you message me when you’ve booked your flight. ’
‘Mum, I’m not sure I’m going back to him,’ Clara said. ‘I don’t think we’re that well suited.’
‘As if that’s important,’ her mother snorted. ‘Clara. You need to think about this. I’m sure with a little time you’ll understand what you need to do. Call me when you’ve decided. And remember – it’s a lonely life if you don’t have anyone to love.’
‘Right,’ Clara croaked. She spun the ring between her fingers again before placing it back on the table.
She had a lot to think about. Should she go ahead and leave a relationship that she’d invested four years in? Or was her mother right, would she end up alone if she did?
She had feelings for Liam, but he’d met up with his ex-wife. Met her for coffee from what Nora had said at the committee meeting. Only Liam still hadn’t mentioned it. Was he playing at caring for her? Was she mad for thinking he did?
She sighed and savoured a brownie, feeling more confused than she had in years, before heading downstairs.