6. Chapter 6
Her heart was a melody. I could lie here until she told me to walk off the earth or drive a blade through my heart. I held onto her tighter, refusing to pull away and ruin this moment of peace, even as I felt the chaos swirling.
“Peiro,” she whispered in my ear. “Do you see those?”
“See what?” I asked, reluctantly pulling away to spot any intruder who dared to shatter this moment. Friend or foe, I would have their head. My eyes scanned the trees, seeing so clearly in the night, spotting no one.
“Nothing. I thought I saw something.” Ophelia’s voice was light but full of authority, similar to her sister’s, but she would never believe that, even if I told her a thousand times. I looked down into her teal eyes that sparkled like precious gems, even with the battles that stormed behind them.
I wanted to laugh that she and I were similar in that way—both of us not wanting others to carry our burdens.
But it was our eyes that seemed to give us away.
A smile moved across my face before I could stop it as I took in her dark hair and her flushed cheeks, evidence of our entanglement just moments ago.
I could stay here in this moment forever.
Something silver flashed across her eyes and disappeared faster than I could gather.
Ever since the Rising Rock, as they call it, I’d noticed her eyes did that a little more often, and the faint silver ring at the edge of her irises had grown thicker.
No one else would have noticed, but my abilities helped me notice the little things.
I just wish she would tell me what was running through her mind when those jeweled eyes flashed.
“Best we go back. I’m sure your sister is worried,” I gruffed, instantly hating the idea.
Ophelia rolled her eyes. “I’m sure she’ll be fine.”
“Hmm. Unfortunately, Sury’s beginning to grow on me, and I’ll wager that your sister is the type that will scold everyone if you’re not brought back in a timely manner…and I don’t want to hear Sury whine in the process.”
Ophelia’s smile widened as she let out a soft laugh. “They’re insufferable sometimes. Always have been, even as children. Quite fitting they’re together.”
“As much as I would love to know more about their childhood notions, I would rather not talk about anyone else while I’m still buried inside you.” My grin widened as I witnessed the flush of her cheeks deepen further. She was so beautiful.
I helped clean her in the brook before we both redressed.
She placed her hand in mine and pulled me close as she rested her head on my chest. I ran my fingers through the strands of her fallen braid, holding her closer.
“I meant what I said, Ophelia. I am a fool for you. But please do not mistake me for a common one.”
She nodded against me and took a deep breath, seemingly steadying herself. “I almost killed her. I wanted to do it…”
I froze. I knew what she said wasn’t true—I’d never seen a more precious bond than with those two sisters. “What do you mean?” I softly asked, encouraging her to say more.
Ophelia took another breath and buried her face in my shirt.
“When the crested walkers attacked, I went into a sort of frenzy… Panic took over when I thought they would hurt everyone, especially when I saw Sury on the ground, and I felt…desperate. I didn’t think, I just used my illicitus to take the lifesources away from those beasts.
” I stayed quiet as she took another shuddering breath.
“But I couldn’t let go. It just took over me, and I saw Ora standing there.
Her lifesource is so full of magic that I wanted it for myself.
I wanted to…consume it and meld it into mine. ”
I pulled back to watch a tear slide down her cheek at the admission.
You fffelt the pull. You fffelt her contrrrol you. Diiidn’t you vow that no one would control youuu ever again? Yet you fiiind the warmth between a womaaan’s legs and now, you’re whaaat? Her puppet? As I told youuu before, kiiill her and be done with iiit.
I tightened my hold on Ophelia, feeling her warmth sink into mine, and rested my chin on top of her head as I continued stroking my fingers through her silky hair.
You’re wrong, I responded to the voice I’ve heard for so long.
My arms held her tighter, grounding me. She would never understand just how steady she makes me.
She’ll rid me of you someday. I believe it.
The deep laugh rumbled against every part of my mind. We’ll see about thaaat.
“Could I really have gone through with it?” she whispered against my hold.
“No,” I said without hesitation. “I don’t believe for a moment you would have allowed yourself to do something like that.” Images of my past life, a wife and children, quickly flashed through my mind. Images of blood and scared eyes. I quickly shook away the thoughts.
A deep cackle rang through my mind again as it receded to the far corners, ready to pounce or force me to remember the most painful moments I wished to forget.
I felt her shift her feet, acutely aware of her strong grip around my waist, pulling me in like she was too afraid to let go. She looked up with fear written in her eyes. “I’m scared,” she whispered.
I moved my hand to cradle the back of her head to hold her gaze. “Scared of what, Naa’n le’ya? Tell me.” I sensed that I already knew the answer, but wanted her to say it for herself. To confirm what she’d been desperately trying to hide the last few weeks.
Her eyes moved across mine. Anyone with half a brain could see that this smart, brave woman was fighting something deep within her. Maybe I was a fool for not approaching her sooner. No matter how hard she tried to hide her pain, I saw it. I had seen her from the moment our paths crossed.
Ophelia licked her trembling lips, seemingly working up the courage.
“It’s getting stronger. Too strong. At times…
” A tear escaped her eyes, but I caught it with my lips as I planted a soft kiss in its wake.
She gave a sad smile but continued. “At times I feel like I can control it, but if I’m not careful… I think it begins to control me.”
She swallowed hard as she trembled beneath my hands and swayed briefly, but I tightened my grip to steady her. She buried her head against my chest again. I stayed still, letting her breathe as I selfishly inhaled her scent of moonlight and jasmine.
“What if,” I started, trying to find the right words, “we told the others? I’m sure they—”
She shook her head. “No. I don’t want them to know. Not yet.”
“Why?” I tried to pull back to meet her gaze, but she refused to look at me.
“Because what if this is the real me? I feel myself holding it together in more ways than I can count anymore.” I felt my tunic catching her tears yet I stayed quiet, letting her pour out what she needed.
“I was always good at hiding in the shadows when I was the typical princess, but now it feels like more. Why did the giants choose me? I’m nothing special. ”
That was it. Unable to handle her self-deprecating thoughts, I sighed.
“Look at me.” I tilted her head up with my fingers, forcing her to look at me.
My heart stammered as I took in the beautiful pools of teal, now streaming with tears.
I felt helpless that I couldn’t battle the thoughts inside her head.
“You are more special than you could ever realize. Why the giants want you to be a part of their grand design is beyond my knowledge, but if they’re as supreme as they’re meant to be, well, then I know they didn’t make a mistake. ”
“Is it the same for you?” We rarely talked about the entity.
The giant’s blasphemy that was coined the Ancient One.
In a way, I was glad she was coming around with her questions, sharing her inquiries here and there.
I wasn’t sure if she was too afraid to ask, but figured if she was truly scared of me, I wouldn’t be welcomed in her life or her bed.
Perhaps it was because I sensed her sadness around it, especially in the moments we all told her she needed to practice harnessing her power against this beast if she wanted to win the inevitable war.
I silently shook my head. “No. I believe it just enjoys the blood sport at my hands.” A wartime pawn.
Who’s lying nooow? You enjoy iiit but refuse to admiiit it. I felt an involuntary shiver run through me as a sharp pain flickered behind my eyes before disappearing.
Ophelia didn’t seem to notice as she continued her line of questions. “Do you sense someone’s power and want it for your own?”
I took a breath. “Not in that way. It’s always there, like it’s lurking in the shadows, until it pierces its claws and uses me as a puppet. I either feel the control from it or by someone else’s hand.”
“It wasn’t until your power that I could find the control I needed to simply think on my own. But when I feel it getting stronger, I have no choice but to obey.” A sad smile crested my face at the words.
“Did you feel it? When I used the illicitus earlier?” She pulled her head away to look me in the eyes. “Your eyes are silver again.”
“Yes. I felt it. But it didn’t hurt the way it has before.” I smiled and kissed the top of her head. “You’re getting better. Stronger. Your practice is working.”
She shook her head. “I don’t understand how sometimes it hurts but in other ways it doesn’t.”
I shrugged, completely oblivious. Despite this thing living inside me, it refused to give me any answers to my own questions.
“Maybe when you use it on me instead of around me, it works differently? Maybe it’s how you harness it?
You said you didn’t think about using your magic, that you just did it.
But when we practice controlling that thing, you clearly hesitate. ”
Her eyes widened in acknowledgement, like something had clicked. “Maybe,” she whispered, then shook her head. “But I’m not getting better if I almost did something so recklessly.”
“You’re stronger than it, Naa’n le’ya. You’re as bright as the full moon and—”