13. Chapter 13
The longer we sat, more images threatened to resurface. The memories from earlier tried to force my heart to sink deeper and deeper into despair, but I felt in control now.
You loved it, though. They told you that you were powerless for so long, yet you showed them all the opposite, the ink whispered.
But you told me I was weak, too. And now you tell me I’m powerful? I retorted at the hypocrisy of the voice inside of my head.
You’ve proved useful, girl. You were weak for never touching your true potential. But after what you showed them today? Now they will fear you. One day, we’ll release on this world our true power.
I closed my eyes tight at the relentless voice inside my head. You’re a monster to believe I will do anything with you.
Me? The monster? Oh no, my dear girl. The monster here is you.
A cackle radiated around my mind, both near and far.
My eyes hurt from the force with which I clenched them.
I felt my heart pick up again as I choked on the recollections that played faster and faster in my mind.
Another wave of grief tried to take over just as I felt light strokes once again on my hair.
“Am I a monster?” It took every ounce of courage I could muster to ask that question, so afraid of the answer.
“Why would you ever think you are?” Peiro’s raspy voice coated me like a warm garment.
“What am I going to do?”
“You’ve only begun to understand this magic that flows through you. Just months ago, you believed you could control so little, and then learned you’ve been greatly lied to. Give yourself some peace in knowing that you will master this.”
Tears threatened to break their hold. “I’m not like Ora.
” I shook my head, feeling old shame creep inside my chest. Old hurts of being the sister who was too weak, and of those old feelings resurfacing.
“She has so much more control and makes everything look so much easier. I don’t know how to stop it from taking over. ”
“As I told you, Naa’n le’ya, we can fight this together.”
I pulled out of his embrace. “But how?” The tears I had worked so hard to hold back now fell, one right after the other.
“You couldn’t stop me before. How can you stop me from doing something like that again?
” I wiped a tear from my cheek. “Giants, what have I done? Their families! What did I do to their families?”
“Stop,” Peiro softly ordered, short yet stern.
“First and foremost, they were guards. They and their families knew of the possibilities with their positions. Second, they attacked us. You were defending your sister. It is instant death to attack a queen and her court. You probably did them justice to not face a crueler end…”
He shifted his body to where he now sat in front of me and took my hands into his, but not before he wiped another tear from my face. “You were angry, and that anger got the best of you.”
“But how can I never be angry? I have so much to be angry for, Peiro. So much.”
Peiro ran his fingers along my scalp and rested his palm at the base of my face and neck. “You have every right to be angry, my moonlight, but what we do with that anger defines us. Be angry. Have your emotions, but don’t let your emotions have you.”
The corners of my mouth turned up a bit. “First a romantic with words of devotion, and now this?” I mused. “When did you also become so wise?”
Peiro flashed a crooked smile as he said, “I think Fyom is rubbing off on me more than I care to admit.”
“Oh? It’s not from all of your years of learning valuable lessons?”
His eyebrow raised as something flashed in his eyes. A challenge. “Are you calling me old?”
I feigned a gasp as I laid my hand on my chest. “Me? I would never.” I batted my wet eyelashes to prove my innocence.
“I don’t think I like the way you’re talking to me,” he said as he shifted to his knees and leaned forward, almost closing me in with his presence.
“Or what?” I said, not backing down.
“I may have to do something about it.”
I couldn’t help but smirk as I lightly bit my lip before moving off the bed. “We both know you’ll do nothing about it. Matter of fact, I think I even spotted you dropping your elbow in the skirmish. You’re looking rusty at your age.”
“Is that so?” His eyes lit up wildly.
I nodded as I took a step back.
A low growl escaped from his chest as Peiro slid off the bed to follow. I walked backward, not taking my eyes off of him as I stood behind a chair across the room.
“You’re not running from me, are you, darling?”
I shook my head as I continued to take light steps backward until my back hit a wall. “I would never.”
Peiro slinked forward, the movements reminding me of a jungle cat with each step. He rounded the chair in front of me just as I moved out of reach, putting a tea table and another chair between us. He stopped, studying me with predatory eyes. “This looks a lot like running to me.”
“Does it?” I smirked. “It must be time to get you spectacles because I assure you, this isn’t me running.” The muscles around my lips began to hurt from how tightly I was holding in my smile.
“Oh, I see what I want perfectly.” Before I could register his movement, Peiro lunged toward where I stood—but before his foot landed, I had already moved to the other side of the table, behind another chair.
He laughed and lunged again, but I had now moved to the far side of the bed, granting us more distance.
Peiro moved with grace around the table and chairs. I balanced on the balls of my feet, ready to lunge again. Right when I thought I had anticipated his next move, Peiro surprised me by lunging onto the bed, completely crossing the obstacle at lightning speed.
I giggled as I jolted to the side and used the wooden beam of the bed to round the corner into an adjoining room that was the bathing chamber. I quickly scanned the room and realized there was no exit to dart to, nor any extra furnishings to continue our facade.
Well, shit.
“Wherever will you go next?” I twirled and found his deep browns staring intently at me with something delightfully wicked in his smile.
Before I could reply, Peiro closed the distance between us in easy movements and kissed me with fervor. “Who would have thought it would be so easy to catch the moon?”
“Yes, well, this moon needs a bath.”
“Granted,” Peiro grumbled as he kissed me again while manipulating the water nozzles.
Within minutes we were in the giant tub, my back against his chest. He had worked a soapy mixture into my hair and helped me wash away the events from earlier. With a soft cloth, he gently rubbed away the dirt from our travels and kneaded the tense tissue in my neck and shoulders.
The bubbles slowly popped, one by one, as we continued to sit there in silence. There was enough light from the sconces to show that the room was made of completely smooth sandstone, as if it had all been carved into a stone wall.
“Tell me what you’re thinking.” Peiro tightened his hold on me. I lazily skimmed the surface of the water, allowing my Firus Wielding to reheat the water for the second time.
“Am I a monster? You never answered me.”
“No. You have never been nor ever could be a monster. The power within you wants to fight for control, but you are stronger.”
More tears threatened to consume me. “How will I fight it? Stay in control?”
“We’ll find a way. Here, take my hand.” I did as he asked, mine immediately becoming engulfed in his large palm. “Your surroundings do not lie—trust what you can touch. What do you feel?”
“The water,” I started. “Your hands and their strength.”
“This is real, Naa’n le’ya. Ground yourself in it. When you feel your world shaking, trust in this.” He gave a firm squeeze of his hand.
“What happens when you’re not around?”
“I will always be near you, my moonlight. In your heart, your soul—even my soul recognized yours the moment we met…but if I cannot be near when you feel the power taking over, plant your feet, strip away the noise within your head, and sense what is real.”
“Is this real?” I mused, attempting to turn the mood light, but I was met with strong fingers turning my head toward his.
“Never doubt it, darling.” He leaned in and kissed me again.