Chapter Six
Silas
There’s no time to question what the hell I’ve just done because my do-good brother Cash is at the door banging like I owe him money.
What the fuck?
“I’m so sorry, angel.” I kiss Ellie’s forehead and hold her against my chest for a long moment before pulling back. “You get dressed, I’ll get rid of my brother, and we’ll get back to what we should be doing.”
She nods sweetly and tips up onto her toes for a kiss.
I hang onto her hips for a second too long, letting the moment linger before she says, “I should get ready for work, anyway.”
The second her heels touch the ground and she turns back toward the hallway, my arms ache for her again.
What the hell is happening to me? I can’t stop staring at her.
The way she walks. The way my T-shirt hangs down past her knees.
The soft swell of her ass swinging back and forth.
I can’t believe I just emptied inside of her.
I just spread her wide and took her virginity on the kitchen counter like I was making a sandwich.
Cash pounds on the door again, this time louder, as though he’s growing impatient. I ease the door open, its hinges groaning.
“Took ya long enough,” my brother grunts as he runs his hand down over his beard.
The man usually looks miserable and frustrated. It’s sort of his signature. Folks often say the same about me, but I say Cash has me beat. The guy has a scowl that could rival a bulldog living in an empty food bowl.
“The sun is barely up. What the hell are you doing here so early?”
He pushes his way inside like he owns the place, clinking a mug down on the counter before pouring himself a cup of coffee. Steam curls from the cup in his hands, but he doesn’t drink it. He just stares at me over the rim. “Who’s here with you?”
I glance toward the extra place setting, and my stomach sinks. My brother has never been good at letting things go. He once dug through my garage in search of a wrench he swore I didn’t return, so this should be interesting. “What?”
He nods toward the second cup of coffee on the table next to the plate of uneaten food. “Someone is here with you.”
“What are you here for?”
A grin lifts his cheeks for the first time in years. “Shit. You gotta woman here, don’t you? Who is she?”
My heart thumps harder as I clear the plates from the table. I’m not sure why I’m doing it. He’s already seen them.
“Well,” he grabs a slice of bacon from my plate before I pick it up, “I was here to talk to you about the strawberry festival today, but now I’m here to figure out why your new girlfriend didn’t finish her breakfast. Thought you were good in the kitchen.”
I shake my head and turn back toward the sink. “I didn’t know you were thinking about the strawberry festival.”
“Why wouldn’t I? It makes perfect sense.” He pauses for a sip of coffee. “We can showcase Dad’s strawberry whiskey and maybe get an edge on those rednecks.”
“Kinda last minute. Did you get us a booth?”
He exhales loudly and sets the mug on the table before glancing up. “That’s the second half of why I’m here. I went to see Josie this morning to see if there was any more space.”
“Okay,” I turn back toward him, “is there?”
He nods. “She has an extra booth for us, but she was also pretty upset. The bakery was broken into last night. The upstairs apartment was vandalized, and her kitchen was trashed.”
“Fuck!” I should be thinking about the bakery and the damage that was done, but my immediate thoughts go to Ellie, who’s supposed to spend the day there. “They know who did it?”
Cash pauses, and I get the feeling this conversation is about to get personal.
“Adam. She has his picture clear as day on her security camera. He didn’t even bother hiding his face.
Guy just walked in, smashed a bunch of shit, spray-painted everything, and destroyed her livelihood.
” He takes a sip of coffee. “I don’t even know if the bear did that much damage when he broke in a few years back. ”
Damn it. My ribs constrict as I try to make sense of what I’m hearing.
The only reason Adam would have vandalized the bakery is to send a message to Ellie, and the reason he needed to send a message was because she left her phone unaccompanied in that apartment last night.
Maybe he went over there to see her. Maybe he thought she was playing tricks.
What the hell is going on with that kid?
I’m in the middle of my thoughts when a loud bang hits on the wall of the backroom.
My brother darts a wide expression toward me. “You’ve gotta tell me who that is. I have my ways, little brother. I’ll figure it out.”
I shake my head and close my eyes, trying to think of an excuse on the fly, though my head is reeling at the moment and excuses aren’t floating their way to the surface.
How could I ever tell anyone that I’m sleeping with my son’s ex-girlfriend? How could I look people in the eye and say I’m screwing around with a woman twenty years younger than me? There’s no excuse for that kind of behavior, and Cash would be the first to point it out.
He’s the kind of guy who’s raising two young kids on his own while simultaneously running a distillery, volunteering at every community event, and working his ranch. He’s not the guy who’d understand the filthy things I’ve been doing.
“Man, you sleeping with the mayor or something?” He laughs and takes another bite of my bacon.
“Thanks for giving me the update on Adam.” I open the front door and stand next to it. “I’ll meet you at the distillery this morning, and we can pack up for the festival together.”
Cash stares at me, then glances toward the coat rack where Ellie’s jacket hangs. I know the man doesn’t know her well enough to know what jacket she wears, yet my chest is tightening like he’s come face to face with the evidence of my sins.
He stands from the table and darts a narrow expression. “Tell me the woman that’s here isn’t who I think it is.”
“What?” I’m still playing dumb.
“You’re feeling guilty about something, and that can only mean one thing.” My brother crosses his arms as he stands in the doorway in the same dark T-shirt and jeans look he’s always wearing.
“Come on. Get outta here.” I open the door wider, staring at him like I’m not the liar I know I am. Funny thing is, I spent years in the Marines learning how to keep my face blank. I was good at it, too. Cash, though, Cash has this way of seeing through everyone.
“Look,” his voice deepens as he steps forward, “if you brought Ellie back here, I pray you’re not doing something stupid.”
I offer him a single nod as the pictures in my mind flash to her tight, dripping pussy served up for me on the kitchen counter twenty minutes ago.
“I know you had a thing for her.”
I narrow my gaze to do my best impression of an innocent man. “That’s insanity.”
“Fuck, dude.” My brother shakes his head. “She’s back there, isn’t she? You didn’t, did you?”
I don’t answer, which is probably worse than lying. At least with lying, he’d wonder if I was telling the truth. Now, he knows I’m an asshole.
“Jesus, man. No wonder Adam is going crazy.”
“Adam doesn’t know.”
“Really?” He shakes his head and swipes his hand down over his graying beard. “You don’t think your son noticed that you had a thing for his girlfriend? I noticed, and I’m not even living with you.”
Jesus Christ! Could that really be true? Could Adam have picked up on what I felt for Ellie?
“No,” I press. “I was never vocal about anything I felt for her, and—”
“And you planted a field of fucking flowers for the girl. You longed for her when she went away, you had private conversations with her, and ogled her when they were—”
“Okay, time for you to go.”
His gaze drops to the porch floor as he shakes his head. “You’re losing it.”
“Really, ‘cause I feel better than I’ve ever felt.” I shrug. “I shouldn’t feel this good, not with everything that’s on the line, but I do.”
“At the expense of your son.”
That one stings. “They’ve been broken up for over a year. I’m not doing anything wrong.”
“Then why are you hiding it?”
I shake my head, knowing full well this kind of want makes me a stupid, piece of shit. “How the hell am I supposed to tell my son that I’m interested in his ex?”
Cash shrugs as wind clips the shutters on the side of the house. “I don’t know. He’s your son, though. You should talk to him before he tears apart the whole town.”
I nod, though I have no fucking clue how I’d ever tell him about Ellie and I.
What words can a person use to describe such forbidden things?
I can’t look at the boy I raised and tell him that his ex-girlfriend is cute as hell, and every time I see her, I can’t help but think about shoving my cock down her throat.
I can’t tell him that I look forward to her smile, or that I feel alive when I’m next to her.
I can’t tell him that there’s something about her, something different from everyone else.
I can’t say I want to make her mine, marry her, have children with her, and build a life with her.
Fuck.
Cash shakes his head. “Talk to your son, Silas. Talk to him before he does any more damage. In the meantime, I’ll be getting things ready for the festival.
I’m going to display Dad’s old whiskey book, maybe remind some of the old-timers of his work.
Hopefully, that will get us an edge on these rednecks from Mullet’s bar.
” He turns to head down the porch. “Seriously, though, get Ellie out of your system now, apologize to Adam, and then get your shit together.”
I should keep my mouth shut. It’s not important that Cash knows that this thing with Ellie isn’t temporary, but for some reason, I can’t help myself. “This isn’t something I had to get ‘out of my system.’ I love her.”
Cash’s eyes widen, and he hangs his head as though his disappointment is overflowing.
“Jesus Christ, dude. You don’t love her.
Her father is a family friend, she’s twenty-five years old, and you don’t have anything in common.
She’s,” he stops himself with a heavy sigh, “just talk to Adam and get your head out of your ass. We’ve got a million things going on with the distillery right now.
No one has time for your midlife crisis. ”
I let out a slow breath, the kind that’ll keep me from saying something I’ll regret. “I’m done apologizing for wanting something for myself.”
“Okay,” he quips, tossing up his hands as though he’s given up. He turns on his heel and stomps down the stairs, each step louder than it needs to be, like he wants me to feel his exit. An exit he doesn’t bother looking back from.
It’s fine. I’m not seeking his approval.
Hell, his approval is the last thing I need.
That said, I don’t disagree with him to some extent.
We’ve been struggling to keep the doors open, and it’s an all-hands-on-deck sort of situation.
I also know what Ellie and I look like to the world.
More than that, I’m now aware that my son has most likely picked up on my feelings for her.
I probably should’ve noticed that sooner.
No one has ever accused me of being emotionally astute.
I could tell you wind speed, direction, and threat level in half a second, but add in a feeling and I’m lost. Feelings don’t follow patterns.
They don’t obey logic. They don’t line up in neat little rows waiting to be assessed.
They just hit, and I’ll be forever learning how to navigate through them.
I scrub my hand down over my face and sink into the solid oak chair at the kitchen table, thinking over the possibility that Cash is right.
Maybe Adam does know what’s going on between Ellie and I.
Maybe I’m an idiot for not seeing it sooner.
Either way, I’ve got a lot to do to get things right.