Stepan
Isit in the car watching Marina walk back around the corner into the bridal shop without looking at me.
I knew before I opened my mouth that she would say no, and I knew better than to ask, but something came over me.
It's one thing to get her to sneak away and be with me.
But she willingly volunteered her body in a risky way.
If her father or Orlov have monitors on her phone, she could get in a lot of trouble, and those pictures weren't even that racy.
But Marina has a pure heart and a good soul.
Her family is running scared and being edged out by the Radin organization’s growth.
Asking her to marry me instead of Orlov is asking her to desert her father who gave her life.
I was stupid to push her, and I'm lucky she agreed to see me again.
I'm taking it too far, too fast, because I’m impulsive and stubborn.
And because I think I really do love her.
My heart feels heavy as I climb over the center console and slide into the driver's seat, making a fresh whiff of her scent billow up around me.
I can see easily now how Kazimir got so carried away with Zora to let her into his inner world so quickly.
We are foolish men to fall so hard for women we shouldn't have or want.
But here I am in a similar boat. He should've been more careful vetting Zora, and I should have been more careful keeping my heart guarded.
The gym is quiet when I walk in, though I hear Kazimir hitting the heavy bag. He doesn't seem to hear me right away as I slink to the locker room and change into my shorts and T-shirt. As I’m walking out, I wrap my wrists and decide I'll join him on the bags for a while.
"You're going to break that bag," I grumble at him, noticing how off I sound. Not that long ago, I was the one tearing into him for being foolish. I have a feeling when my family learns how bad I have it for this girl, I’ll never hear the end of it.
"Good." Kaz gives the bag a one-two punch and I watch it spin a few times, but as I take to my own bag, hitting hard and fast, I know it's not going to help me kill this anger.
Men who are in touch with their emotions would just be sad. Some may drink or use drugs to kill the pain, but I just get mad. I get so mad I could kill. It may be why I'm in the role I'm in, working with Roman, but while that anger is useful to others, it does nothing but hinder me.
"You want to hit something that hits back?
" he asks, holding his bag still. He stares at me as I give the bag a few more stiff blows and decide he's right.
Sparring always helps me, and I know it helps him.
There's a reason we both show up at this place at times, and tonight, I just need a good distraction.
I step away from the bag and turn around. Kazimir is already taping his hands, pulling the wrap between his fingers and around his wrists. He flicks a glance up at me and I scowl.
"What are you staring at?" I snarl, walking to the wall to turn the lights on. They flicker to life and buzz as I climb into the ring, ignoring the fact that I have no gloves or headgear on.
"What crawled up your ass and died?" he asks, and I can hear the humor in his voice.
He's not going to let me out of this without spilling everything, but I'm not the sort to overshare.
It's none of his business. I'm gonna do my job and I'm gonna do it well.
I just don't know how to do it without hurting her, which suddenly is my concern when before, I couldn't have cared less.
Kazimir climbs into the ring with me, rubbing his hands together, and I throw first. A jab that he slips, followed by a cross that he catches on his forearm.
He counters with a short hook to my ribs that I feel through my core.
I circle left but he mirrors me lazily. He's sloppy and I'm too tense to bark out how he's too loose or slow.
"Heard the delivery teams ran clean last week," he says, throwing a jab that I parry.
"Yeah." I fire a combination—jab, jab, cross—and the cross lands on his shoulder. He absorbs it and steps in with a body shot that makes me exhale hard. "Ro was happy about it."
"Yeah, I heard he wants to double the shipment frequency by next month." Kazimir's feet slide on the mat instead of bouncing. He's either tired or trying to throw me off. I just stay focused on his chest, watching the periphery for any movement.
I throw a hook that he blocks with his elbow before he fires back with a straight right that I slip by an inch. The air from it brushes my cheek. He's gonna have me in stitches if I don't get on my game. But physical pain helps distract me from the anger. Maybe it wouldn’t be all that bad.
"What about the alliance?" he asks, starting to be a bit lighter on his toes.
I reset my stance and circle away from the ropes, annoyed he can't just keep his nose in his own business. "We can talk about it later, Kaz."
He reads the tone immediately, and his hands drop a little—not enough to leave himself open but enough to signal he's listening. "What's going on?" he asks.
I throw a lazy jab that he bats away. We're still moving, still circling, but the pace has dropped.
The sparring has shifted from training to trading angry blows.
I know better than anyone that when it gets to this point, there's no use in trying to hide it.
Kaz and I have been close for years, since we were kids, and he's gonna find out.
I may as well just be open and tell him.
I throw a cross that he slips. "I asked her to marry me."
Kazimir stops circling and scoffs, lowering his hands.
"You asked Sergei Belova's daughter to marry you.
" He processes it for about two seconds before he throws a jab that catches me on the chin because I'm not paying attention.
The impact snaps my head and brings me back to my body and out of my thoughts where I get stuck thinking of her.
"Focus," he says, but I'm in no state to be in this ring. I'm beginning to think the bar would’ve been a better choice.
"She said no, okay?" I reset and shake my head, raising my fists to cover my face, but we're circling again. He's not pressing me too hard, but I can see by the look on his face that he thinks I’m stupid.
He throws a combination that I block and counter, then slips my counter and comes back with a hook to my ribs that I eat because I'm a half-second late getting my elbow down.
It forces the air up from my lungs and I double over, grunting.
I deserved that. I'm being lazy, watching his eyes to see what he's thinking instead of his chest to make sure I catch every movement.
"I don't get what the play is here. I thought you were supposed to end that alliance, not make a new one.
" Kazimir has a point. My job is to stop Orlov and Belova from aligning.
That doesn't require me to sleep with her or fall in love, but I've done both.
My original plan to soil her and show Orlov would've worked if I hadn't let her get in my head so easily.
"I had a plan and it would’ve worked."
Kazimir catches my next jab and ties me up, pulling me into a clinch. We grapple for a second, his forearm against my neck, my hand on his shoulder until he pushes me off and we reset.
"What happened?" he asks, turning to the side to spit.
"She won't do it, okay? She's too loyal to her family, even though I can give her everything Orlov can and more.
I just don't think she'll even go to her father to ask him.
" We may not have access to the same trade routes, but together the Radins, Kuzins, and Belovas would dominate the entire region.
Kazimir throws a straight right that I block and we exchange body shots in close. His fist connects with my floating rib and I answer with a hook to his kidney that makes him grunt. I'm finally getting my head into this and he knows it.
"There's a simpler way to do this," he says, panting. Sweat darkens the collar of his shirt. "Kill Orlov."
I stop circling and narrow my eyes at him. "What?"
"Kill him—stage it as a smuggling deal gone wrong. If you do it right, no one's the wiser and the alliance is off. Poof—" He opens his fingers in front of my face like fireworks and grins. He just doesn't get it. It's not that easy. It could start a war.
He throws a light jab to keep me honest and I parry it without thinking. Now my reflexes are kicking in, and if he's not careful, I'll hand him his own ass. "Roman won't go for it," I say.
"Why not?"
"Because killing Orlov in cold blood isn't how Roman operates. He doesn't start wars on purpose. And if the Orlov family traces it back to us—even a suspicion—we're fighting on two fronts before the gun operation is fully running. We don't have the infrastructure for that yet."
Kazimir shrugs and throws a combination that I block on reflex. "Just stage the hit during one of his border runs, make it look territorial, and nobody looks twice at us. Why get Ro involved?"
I don’t like it. Kazimir is like this—secretive and a bit sneaky at times.
It's why he kept Zora a secret from us for so long.
We all learned a hard lesson from that. I know better than to go behind Roman's back.
I just don't know how to tell him what I want without him denying me. It's tempting, but I can't do it.
"No," I say. "Maybe at some point, it will become necessary, but I have to do this my way."
"Your way? She's not gonna marry you, Cousin. And if she does, will all hell break loose?" His uppercut has me swinging wildly away, but I return it with a low jab and he doubles over and grunts.
"I just have to give her a reason to say yes."
Kazimir hits me with a body shot that I deserve for dropping my guard, but I absorb it and answer with a cross that he blocks.
When it comes down to it, I may very well go and kill Maksim Orlov myself.
He has what I want, whether I like it or not, and maybe it's not her affection or her desire, but it's her, nonetheless.
When Kaz comes at me with a fast jab, hook, jab, I feint right but catch the blow on my shoulder and spin around, falling to my knees. When I'm down, he taps my head a few times and I spit at his feet.
"Drastic times call for drastic measures, Cousin.
" He hovers, playing devil's advocate. He's always been the rebellious one and now he's trying to get me to play along.
"Orlov is a snake. You think he's gonna let her get away when he sees dollar signs?
She could be Jezebel herself, fucking every man in this city, and as long as her daddy signs that contract so Orlov gets his ten percent, he isn't gonna care.
You know as well as I do that he'll bed her on the wedding night and bring home a whore the next day. "
Just the thought of him treating her like that enrages me. I want to rise up and wrap my arms around Kaz's hips, barrel him into the ropes and unleash on him. But it isn't Kazimir I'm angry with. It’s life.
I'm pissed that Roman taught us all that blind killing isn't good.
I'm mad that there's this code in our family to do things with the least violence as possible.
We're criminals, yes, and we take things and hurt people at times, yes, but what Kazimir is suggesting would be a hard no from my cousin.
He will never permit me to murder Orlov in cold blood just so I can have the girl.
As much as my own body gets energized at that thought, I can't do it.
Kaz taps my head again and clicks his tongue.
"Your secret's safe with me, Cousin. Just don't wait too long.
Orlov is already lining up with Belova. The marriage is somewhat cosmetic at this point.
Wait much longer to move and you'll have to answer to Sergei as to why his beloved son-in-law is dead. "
I watch my cousin climb out of the ring and shuffle toward the heavy bags and I stand and start tearing the tape off my wrists. Killing Orlov isn't on the table. I have to keep telling myself that.
If not, I’m gonna use that intel Timur got me and go hunt him down tonight. If she won’t say yes to me because of him, I may just remove him as a means to force her hand.
Because she's mine.
And I’m not taking no for an answer.