IVY
S hortly after Clint and I started fooling around on the couch, Rowdy knocked at the door and asked if we’d watch Goblin while he was out of town.
“I’d normally leave him at the Sorority House, but I know your pocket-sized sweetie loves these little fluff monsters.”
Ignoring his comment about my height, I knelt to look at Goblin in the carrier. He wagged his tail at the sight of my face.
“Can we doggy sit?” I asked Clint.
Stroking my head, Clint nodded and held Rowdy’s gaze. I sensed they were keeping me out of the loop on something. I didn’t need more stress, so I ignored whatever was going on and focused on Goblin.
“Does he have any special needs?”
“Yes, he requires you to let him gnaw on your fingers every few hours so he feels alive.”
“No,” Clint stated.
“He’s got a taste for yummy lady fingers. I might need to get a girlfriend, just so he can get his fix.”
“Goblin will be fine,” Clint insisted. “Has he gone out yet?”
“My boy is ready to sleep through the night. Very well behaved. Just give him a few Ivy finger nibbles, and he’ll be fine while I’m gone.”
“When will you be back?” I asked.
Rowdy studied me with his bright blue eyes. If I haven’t fallen hard for Clint, I could imagine nursing a crush on his cousin. Rowdy was handsome and often wore a devious smirk. When he focused on someone, he treated the moment like it was very important and nothing else mattered. I suspected women went nuts over him.
“I’ll be back in a few days. If you get sick of my little beast, let Sabrina know and she’ll take him to the Sorority House.”
“It’ll be fine,” Clint assured him. “Travel safe.”
After the men finished their silent conversation and Rowdy left, Goblin whined at the door for a while. I stuck close to the sad dog until Clint gestured for me to join him on the couch.
“I’m starting to worry you’re only sticking with me to get close to all these damn dogs,” Clint said, wearing a smile as I straddled his lap. “I might not be as small or cute, but I have talents.”
Clint’s kiss set fire to my nerves. I wrapped my arms around his neck and wiggled my hips closer until there was no space between us.
Clint’s fingers were calloused, yet his touch remained tender. They slid over my hips, up my back, down my shoulders, and grazed my breasts. Just a taste of what was to come.
Wildly aroused, I grinded my pussy against his crotch without thinking. We moaned together. My hands disappeared into his hair. He cupped my butt. Our bodies ached for more.
“Mercy,” Clint mumbled, prying his lips from mine. “You’re going to make me jizz my jeans.”
I looked down between us and then glanced up to his bedroom. When my gaze met his, we both knew what I was thinking.
“No,” he whispered and kissed me again.
Without the ability to speak, I simply enjoyed the feel of him against me. His chest was hard and hot under my fingertips.
Once he peeled his lips away, I scooted back enough to admire his tattoos. There were roses inked in black and gray. I noticed similar designs on the vests worn by Clint and his cousins when they were together at the Reed family home.
I traced the skull on his left pectoral before his lips found mine. Clint reclined me on the couch and rested his body against the back. He tugged a plush black blanket over us and kissed me again.
We stayed this way long after our lips parted. Clint turned on the TV and found a funny movie. Occasionally, I’d turn over and face him. A few times, I closed my eyes and rested my face against his chest. Clint kissed my head whenever I went quiet for too long.
For the first time, I felt truly comfortable with this sexy man. He was more than an impossibly beautiful, intimidating creature. Clint had heard my secrets and still wanted more of me.
By the time we made popcorn as a late snack, I had memorized the way his beard grew and the shape of his Adam’s apple. Clint didn’t put on his shirt, allowing me a full view. I chose to leave my shirt partially unbuttoned, just enough to reveal what I had long wanted hidden.
I pretended my ugliest scar was no different than Clint’s tattoos or those jagged marks on his back and thigh. If I could get over my hangups, sex would be far more fun. And I was very interested in sex!
Clint made my body hum. I found myself overly focused on his bare flesh. I couldn’t believe how achy I felt between my legs. Sure, I’d fantasized about men before. I masturbated from time to time. But the men in my head didn’t radiate heat like Clint. I never imagined them smelling so masculine.
I couldn’t keep my hands off him. Not when we relaxed on the couch or when we went to his bed for the night.
Clint wasn’t much better at controlling himself. His hands were on my breasts and between my legs. He teased my slit and licked my nipple through my shirt. I sunk my fingers into his thick hair and let the pleasure build. I didn’t expect to orgasm. We’d been fooling around off and on for hours in a relaxed, fun way. There was no pressure to find relief.
Yet, I orgasmed after the mildest stroke of my clit through my pajama bottoms. My body was awash in hot pleasure. I’d never felt so free. I rode the pleasure for another few minutes. Clint didn’t rush me, even though I knew his erection hoped for the same relief.
“Now you,” I mumbled against his lips. “Show me how.”
“You’ll barely have to do a damn thing,” he said, sounding pained. “Your body makes me fucking nuts.”
Clint guided my hand to his cock hidden under his soft boxers. He showed me how to quicken my pace. I brushed my fingers from the base to the head, finding the fabric wet from his pre-cum.
Helping him orgasm filled me with such pride. I wanted so much to be sexy and appealing to Clint. I needed this incredible man to crave me. As he moaned my name and kissed me tenderly, I wanted to give him everything.
“I didn’t plan that,” Clint mumbled, sounding a little embarrassed. “I’m a guy who’s normally in control of himself. But you make me weak and wild.”
“I want to give you everything like you’ve given me,” I said and wrapped my arms around him. “I don’t want you to do without.”
“Everything is going to be okay,” he whispered.
Something about Clint’s tone made me think he was speaking to himself as much as me. Though sensing he was worried, I chose not to push the subject. We were still getting to know each other. I might be reading him wrong, so I chose to trust him and enjoy our post orgasm bliss.
In the dark condo, I thought back to my life in Reno. I used to imagine I wasn’t sleeping alone. I dreamed up pets, lovers, friends, and family. They changed depending on my mood. Though those fantasy people and animals offered me comfort, they weren’t real. If I were sad, they couldn’t comfort me. I was alone with the voices in my head.
Turning over to face Clint, I sensed he was still awake. His fingers soon traced my lips, and he scooted closer.
“I felt like I might be losing you when I learned about your childhood health issues,” Clint said. “It’s so crazy to me how I didn’t even know you existed days ago. Now, I’m terrified of a future where you won’t be at my side.”
“The doctor really did say I was healthy.”
“I know, but today awakened a fear inside me.”
Cradling his hand between mine, I wanted to make a big speech about how he had no reason to fear for my health. Being assertive felt like the right move, but I held my tongue.
Earlier, when I got upset over showing Clint my scars, he could have busted right through my defenses. I would have backed down. He was a difficult man to tell no.
Instead, Clint had backed off and let me go at my own pace. Without the pressure from him, I pushed myself to reveal a little more.
That’s why I didn’t try to convince him about my health or how he had no reason to fear losing me. Those would be words he already knew but struggled to trust.
Clint had clearly been spoiled. He was so effortlessly handsome and confident. He came from a good, loving family. He had so many friends constantly texting him. The man was born lucky.
That was Geraldine’s problem. When she had a defective baby, it ruined her perfect life. She reacted in toxic ways, sabotaging herself, me, and the entire family.
Clint was a whole lot smarter and tougher than my mother had been. Faced with hardship, he wouldn’t fall apart. I just needed to allow him time to adjust to his new reality.
I cuddled up next to him and kissed his shoulder. I loved being able to touch him whenever I wanted. My family wasn’t particularly affectionate. Of course, as a child, I got babied. I was often cuddled by Grandmother Abigail. My mom treated me like her doll. I was allowed to crawl into my uncles’ laps when they watched movies. All that affection faded away once I got older and Grandmother Abigail died.
Now, I had Clint and his family, who offered affection easily. Even Ford patted my head before I left, like I was a good little dog.
On my third night in Little Memphis, I slept deeply and dreamed of riding with Clint all over town. At some point, I heard him speaking quietly to Hanzee. I awoke long enough to realize the sun was up and he was taking the dogs to the courtyard.
My eyes felt heavy. I didn’t want to get up. My body was extremely relaxed under the warm blankets. Clint wouldn’t mind if I slept longer. I didn’t have to get moving.
Once I remembered I was cooking today, I snapped fully awake and threw aside the blankets. Cleaning up quickly in the downstairs bedroom, I dressed in stretchy black jeans and a cool lavender button-up shirt that Elle gave me. I tied back my hair and applied a light layer of makeup.
I wanted to look beautiful for Clint, but also relaxed. That was why I unbuttoned the shirt to just above my bra, revealing my scar. Shame burned my chest, and I nearly covered up.
“No,” insisted my wild side to the scared woman in the mirror. “Clint deserves a brave bitch.”
I stopped hiding in the bathroom and headed to the kitchen to cook. Clint surprised me by returning with an extra dog.
“Someone must have announced we’re open to dog sitting,” he said as Boa strutted along with Hanzee and Goblin into the condo. “Rock is riding down to Rawlins to see his parents and asked us to watch his dog.”
I smiled at the three of them moving together around the condo before they settled down at the windows. Clint dropped a kiss on my grinning lips.
“I’m just about to start cooking,” I told him.
Clint kissed the top of my head and admired the prep work I’d already done.
“I’m keeping it simple,” I said, full of pride. “I wanted to make omelets, but I only know how to make one at a time.”
“I don’t cook, so whatever you make will be much appreciated.”
“You don’t cook, but can you?”
“Of course. Shay made sure Elle and I knew how to take care of ourselves. I should cook for you.”
His words made my heart race, yet I kept my gaze on the food rather than the sexy man at my side. Clint acted as my assistant. Soon, we sat at the kitchen island with our breakfast and coffee.
Clint moaned his approval at the breakfast hash, making me feel like an ace chef. We enjoyed our meal while the dogs barked and growled at the birds outside. Once riled up, the three tiny beasts bounced around and barked at people down on the street.
Fascinated by the dogs, I nearly didn’t notice Clint pull out his phone. He was frowning slightly at whatever text he received. When his gaze met mine, I knew whatever was going on was related to me. Rather than push for details, I watched him until he fessed up on his own.
“Lula just touched down in Reno,” Clint said, and I froze midbite. “Your uncle fought the court order. He made claims about your health and safety. Lula has gone there to ensure things are handled.”
“Just leave my stuff there,” I blurted out, panicked now. “You can’t put Lula at risk.”
Clint took my hand and tugged me over to his chair. I gripped his shirt and imagined those men who hurt me putting their hands on Lula.
“Don’t stress this. Lula has handled government entities and criminal organizations. She can handle your uncle.”
“Uncle Linus has those men helping him.”
“They’re not helping him, Ivy. They’re trying to get paid. Now, he’s stirring up a legal issue that’ll draw attention to them. They won’t like that.”
Clint's last words were meant as a warning. Uncle Dwight was dead. Clint hadn’t spelled that out, but I noticed how he didn’t mention him, either. I figured he knew the truth, so I accepted it without asking for details.
Now, Uncle Linus had a target on his back. Well, I guess, he already had one before I left Reno. He tried transferring that target onto me. I’d spent a week avoiding the reality of what he did. I loved Uncle Linus. My family was all I had for so long. I didn’t want to be the reason they died.
“Are you sure Lula is safe there?”
“Rowdy and a few Crimson Guard members went with her. They plan to hit up the casinos when they’re done with your problem. Instead of worrying, you should be happy they get a vacation.”
“What about Dillon?” I asked, still feeling guilty.
“She’s staying with Pax and Bebe during the school week. She spends most weekends in Little Rock with her dad. Not much will change. Everything is okay.”
Studying him, I considered keeping my mouth shut and being thankful. That was how I lived my life in Reno. But I wanted to be someone better here. And that woman refused to hide in her head when she could step out and use her voice.
“You said I shouldn’t keep secrets from you, but you’ve kept them from me.”
“That’s true.”
“I feel like if the situation were as safe as you’re saying, you would have told me sooner.”
“I’m still getting to know you,” Clint admitted. “I wasn’t sure how you’d handle the news. But I understand you better today than I did yesterday.”
“If I had flipped out last night about my scar, would you have kept this a secret?”
“Probably.”
“I’m not weak,” I said with great flair before adding, “I don’t think I am down deep, anyway. I mean, I did run off with you. That was strong, right?”
Clint smiled as his arms wrapped around me. “You took a shot with a hot biker. That was a baller move.”
“I want to face my problems. It’s not fair for you to have everything on your shoulders while there’s nothing on mine.”
“You’re seeing this wrong. If you and I were having this conversation in a year, hell, even in a month, I’d understand why you’d think I was babying you. But it hasn’t even been a week. This is the first day we’ll spend most of our time together without an audience. You also faced all those tests yesterday. Plus, you gave your first handjob.”
I snorted and covered my mouth. “It felt like you did everything with that.”
Clint nuzzled his lips against my throat, stealing my giggles and leaving me swooning. “Your hand was all I felt.”
Kissing Clint, I tried not to imagine Lula in Reno. The city had been my only home, but it felt dangerous after those men hurt Uncle Dwight and me. I knew Lula was in the Crimson Guard. She was supposed to be scary in court. But I couldn’t see past her soft beauty.
Popping my lips free, I stroked Clint’s jaw and stared into his relaxed gaze. “I’m worried about Lula and Rowdy.”
“I get that. You haven’t seen her go crazy on anyone before. And Rowdy seems like a goofball, but he’s a dangerous man.”
Despite his words, I felt guilty. “What if we just left my stuff there?”
“No. Your uncle put you at risk and sent you running. He’s had time to consider what he did and could have shown class by letting us take your things. Instead, he still wants to control you. If we back down, he’ll try to find you.”
Clint hesitated when tears filled my eyes. “I know he’s your family. It’s hard to accept the people you trust aren’t worth your devotion. But your uncle chose for you to suffer for his sins. I refuse to show him pity,” Clint said and kissed my cheek. “That’s why you need to let me handle this. I can see him clearly. My only responsibility is to you.”
“And Lula and Rowdy. They’re family and in your club. They might be in danger, just so I can have my things.”
“That stuff is yours. If we can get it for you, why shouldn’t we? You’ve done nothing wrong. I don’t like letting the bad guys win.”
Clint’s words hit me hard. I hadn’t viewed Uncle Linus as a bad guy. I had seen my uncles struggle with their addictions. I knew how scared they got when their problems wore down on them. I’d always taken their side, even now when Linus was against me.
“One day,” Clint said as I rested my head on his shoulder and accepted the reality of what was happening in Reno, “I’ll be too close to something. Or I’ll have a bad day and need you to make me feel better. There’ll be times when you’re the one calling the shots. For now, let me take care of this, okay?”
I lifted my head and admired Clint. Early on, I was blinded by his good looks and the need for him to like me.
Today, as we finished breakfast, Clint became more real to me. I was starting to understand how he ticked inside. If he believed his people could handle Reno, I needed to trust his plans.