Chapter 9
The boy with the grudge. All she saw was a man who had a lot of caring inside of him and no way to let it out.
When he was this close to her she couldn’t really think about anything other than kissing him.
It was that mouth of his. Full lips, stubborn set to his jaw, just made her want to ruffle his hair and pull him closer…
So she did.
Put her hands on either side of his face, went up on tiptoe and brushed her lips against his. His parted and she felt the warm rush of his breath as his tongue swept into her mouth. Closing her eyes as Chay’s arms went around her, pulling her closer until she stopped thinking.
God, the warmth of his body enfolded her, and his hands slid down her back, cupping her butt as he drew her more firmly against him. The nudge of his growing erection against her belly made her squirm and try to get closer as she deepened the kiss.
He pulled his mouth from hers, his mouth on her neck.
Holding on to his shoulders, she tipped her head to the side to give him more access to her skin.
One of his hands slid up under her sweater, warm against her back.
His finger stroking the small of her back in just these small sweeps that sent shivers through her.
She wanted to touch him. Maneuvered herself until she could get her hand under his shirt. He’d worn a button-down with the tail left hanging out, and as she snaked her hand up under it, she groaned when she encountered the soft cotton of a T-shirt.
He laughed against her neck, which made her smile and her nipples get perky.
“What’s the matter?” he teased.
“I want to touch you,” she said.
“You are,” he pointed out.
“Touché.” There was a lightness in Chay at this moment that she didn’t normally encounter with him. She undid the buttons of his shirt and then looked up at him, their gazes meeting as she tugged his T-shirt from his jeans and pushed her hand under it.
He was hot and hard. Her fingers moved across his abdomen and around his waist.
His breath caught in his throat as he waited to see what she would do next. She drew her fingernail up his back, lightly, and watched as his pupils dilated and his breathing got the smallest bit quicker.
His touch on her back changed. His fingers no longer just randomly stroking her but instead moving more deliberately, stroking her with intent as his hand moved down her back to her butt and dragged her even closer.
His mouth was on hers again, his tongue in her mouth as she felt the ridge of his erection against her center. She moaned again, felt it echo in their joined mouths as he thrust his hips against hers.
He felt so good.
She heard some noises, knew that Gracie was waking but tried to ignore it. She didn’t want this moment with Chay to end. Not yet.
Just another few moments, Gracie, she thought.
But the baby was awake and crying for Ava.
Chay set her away from him and nodded toward the hall. “Go on.”
She hurried to the baby’s room. Her heart was racing and her entire body was throbbing. If only Gracie had slept longer, but it wasn’t the little sweetheart’s fault she was awake.
“Hello, honey. Ava’s here,” she said. In her heart she almost wanted to say Mommy’s here, but didn’t give in to that impulse. She wasn’t going to be Gracie’s mom; she was her foster mom, sure, but it was important for Ava to remember this was temporary.
Gracie looked over at her, stopping her crying as she did so. Her hand was still in her mouth, and Ava lifted her out of the crib, cuddling her close.
She changed Gracie’s diaper and then carried her down the hall. Chay wasn’t in the hallway; instead he’d moved to the living room. He had the TV on with the volume down low.
“There you are,” she said.
“Yeah. Didn’t know if I should stay or go but didn’t want to ghost while you were taking care of Gracie.”
“Thanks for that. I don’t mind if you stay,” she said. Actually, she wanted him to stay. There was something so homey about this moment. She wanted it to last.
“I can stay until midnight,” he said. “I’ve got the early shift tomorrow.”
“Great. Um…did you pick a movie?” she asked him.
“Nah, this was on.”
She glanced at the screen. It was one of the Marvel movies with the superheroes. “I haven’t seen this one.”
“I might have. It’s hard to remember them all.”
“Yeah. I think this is my favorite superhero movie.” Ava sat down next to him, and Gracie, who had her pacifier in her mouth, reached for Chay. He took the baby, holding her against his chest, and then reached for Ava and pulled her up against him.
“So I what I remember is that Bucky killed Tony’s parents and Cap knows but hasn’t told him. And then the general wants them all to sign some kind of accord, which basically limits what they can do.”
“And they don’t want to?” she asked.
“Well, half of them don’t,” he said. “Setting up an epic battle.”
“Good, I like to see my superheroes battling,” she said, curling her legs under her and putting her hand on his stomach as they watched the movie.
Chay was so warm and comfy next to her, and as she watched Gracie, the little girl started to get sleepy again. Maybe she’d just been lonely. Ava felt her own eyes getting heavy as the movie played on. She put her hand next to Gracie on Chay’s chest, and Gracie wrapped her fist around Ava’s finger.
Closing her eyes for just a second, Chay’s hand rubbing her shoulder and the soft sound of the television lulled her to sleep.
Carefully, Chay adjusting the sleeping Gracie higher on his shoulder and moved Ava off his shoulder so he could stand.
But he didn’t want to move from the couch.
It felt like home in a way that he’d rarely experienced.
There were only a few moments in his life he could remember feeling like this.
Always they had been with his grandmother.
Ava Colton was weaving some kind of magic around him, and he was helpless to stop her.
The rational part of him knew that this wouldn’t last. The baby was only temporarily in Ava’s care.
She was only in his life because of a case and the baby she wanted him to adopt.
Something he knew he wasn’t going to do.
So letting himself feel anything toward these two women had stupid written all over it.
While he wasn’t the smartest man on the planet, he’d always been wise enough to steer clear of emotional entanglements. Had promised himself when his mom walked out of his life that he wouldn’t give anyone the power to hurt him like that again.
He was self-sufficient, took pride in the fact that he didn’t need anyone, but damn. He hugged both of them closer to him. He wanted them to be his.
Want was so different. So dangerous. It made him believe that if he took a risk then he’d…what? His mind wasn’t going to let him form that thought.
The movie was over. He’d muted it so the noise didn’t wake either of them. He knew he had to leave to drive home and get some rest before his shift tomorrow. But the couch felt so comfy and these two sleeping ladies held him in a net that he wasn’t even trying to break free from.
Ava stirred, her eyes opening sleepily. “Hi.”
“Hey, there. Enjoy your rest?” he asked.
“Yeah. Your shoulder is comfy.”
He wriggled his eyebrows at her, tempted to tell her she should try the rest of him. But he felt vulnerable. Something he really hated. So kept his mouth shut.
“Oh, look at the time. You said you had to leave at midnight,” she said, getting up and then reaching down to take Gracie. A strand of her hair brushed against his forearm, sending a tingle of awareness through him.
“I’ve got her,” he said, getting to his feet. “Also, it’s okay. I didn’t mind.”
Oh, he a thousand percent hadn’t minded holding her while she slept. The only thing better would have been in if they’d been in his big king-size bed and he’d made love to her before she drifted off.
“Well, thank you,” she said, wiping her hands on her jeans. “What do you say I return the favor and cook you dinner at your place tomorrow night?”
“Yes,” he said. “Why don’t you come early and we can go for a hike before dinner?”
He had the early shift at work so should be home by two. He was off on Sunday as well, so maybe…what? Was he really going to keep seeing her? She made him long for things that he’d given up wishing for a long time ago. He didn’t want to be hurt again. Didn’t want to risk his heart.
There was a part of his subconscious that didn’t see Ava as a risk. But his mind did.
She was too…tempting. It wasn’t just her curvy body or thinking about having sex with her that had him losing sleep.
It was her smile, the way she sassed him and tried to boss him around.
Even though he’d made it clear he wasn’t going to adopt Gracie, she kept showing him…
that he could. That there was a world where he might be a father to this sweet baby.
He started to sweat at the thought. Turning away from Ava, he took Gracie to her bed and nestled the baby in her crib.
He traced the Navajo designs that were as natural to him as breathing.
Seeing the spider woman, knowing she’d protect little Gracie, he leaned down to kiss the baby’s forehead before turning to walk to the hallway.
Ava waited for him there. “You’re so natural with her.”
“I’d have to be a monster not to be,” he said. He wasn’t about to let her continue to build something in his own mind where he’d risk being a parent to Gracie. His biological mother had walked away from him. More than once. And when she’d left him the last time, he’d never heard from her again.
Sure, he wanted to be all whatever, but he’d waited for a call or a letter from her. A DM or something on socials, but she hadn’t been on there and she’d never reached out. The next time he’d seen her, she’d been in her coffin.
“I’ve got to go.”
“Yeah. You okay?”
No. But it wasn’t manly to admit. His grandmother would scoff at that. Since when did being manly mean not having emotions? The world demands it, Grandmother.