Then
I’m standing in front of the floor-length mirror in my bedroom and studying the outfit I chose to wear for my sweet sixteen birthday party.
I wish I didn’t have to attend because I hate birthdays and the lavish parties my parents throw, but I’m happy I get to see Grayson again.
My mother appears in the doorway with her dirty blonde hair fully down, wearing a white dress and white high-heels. “Violet, guests are starting to arrive.”
“I know. You don’t need to remind me for the hundredth time.”
“Don’t get smart with me.”
“I’m not.”
My mother tilts her head, folding her arms in front of her chest. “Don’t you think that dress is a bit suggestive?”
I scoff. “Seriously? It reaches all the way down to the floor. I could trip on it.”
“It’s shiny and tight,” she says with no emotion on her face. “It’s not appropriate for a sixteen-year-old girl to wear to her birthday party.”
The dress I’m wearing is floor-length in a shiny, hot pink color. It’s totally appropriate for a teenage girl to wear.
“It’s pretty, and I like it.” I pause. “It’s my birthday.
This is my sweet sixteen party that you so graciously threw for me.
I’m tired of you always telling me what to wear and how to act.
I’m nothing like you. It’s time for you to accept that.
Let me be who I want to be. I bought this dress with my own money that I earned from working at Sweet & Salty. I’m. Wearing. It. End of story.”
My mother lifts her head up, walking over to me. Her hand comes into contact with my face, leaving me shocked and terrified. My chest is rapidly heaving and goosebumps appear all over the top layer of my skin.
She’s never hit me before.
She usually hurts me with her words, not her hand.
“Don’t you ever talk back to me like that again.” She briskly turns and walks away from me.
As my mother struts out of my bedroom, I find myself at the doorway. “I hate you!” I shout, running back into my room and slamming the door behind me.
Making my way into the bathroom, I flip on the light so I can inspect my face. I lightly touch the area where my mother hit me with my middle and ring fingers. “Goddammit.”
I bring my hands underneath my chin in an attempt to hold myself together, but it doesn’t work. I fall onto the floor with my head buried in my lap. Feeling my phone buzz, I click on a text notification from Grayson.
Grayson
Hey Angel, I’m here. Where are you?
Me
My bedroom. I’m begging you to not come in here. Please just wait for me outside somewhere. I’ll be out in a minute
Grayson
What’s wrong?
Me
Please don’t come in here
Grayson
Hold on tight. I’m coming
My bedroom door swings open before it closes. Grayson’s voice travels into the bathroom. “Violet!”
“I told you to not come in here.”
He sees me on the bathroom floor and rushes over to me, sitting in front of me. He places his hands on my knees. “What happened?”
My glassy eyes meet his face, but my hands are covering my cheeks. “I don’t want to talk about it.”
“Violet, please tell me what happened.” He moves my hands away from my cheeks to reveal the bruise my mother left from hitting me. He has a disgusted look written all over his face. “Who did this to you?”
“I-it…” I trail off.
“If Blake did this to you, I’ll go beat his ass right now.”
“No, it wasn’t Blake.” I gulp deep, almost choking on the lump going down my throat. “It was…my mother.”
“Georgia hurt you?!”
“All because I talked back to her.” I roll my eyes before tears begin to stream down my face.
“Tell me exactly what happened.”
“S-she told me my dress was t-too shiny and tight. I told her I’m wearing it because I b-bought it with my own money.
I told her I’m tired of her constantly wanting me to be like her because I’m n-not her, and I never will be.
She doesn’t stop. It n-never stops. I’m so tired of her telling me I’m not pretty enough.
I’m tired of her wanting me to be perfect. I hate it, and I hate her.”
He moves over to be in closer proximity to me.
I bend my knees, bringing my legs up to my chest. My arms are folded on top of my knees, and I bury my head in them.
He gently rubs my back to comfort me. Putting the pad of his thumb underneath my chin and his index finger on the lower part of it, he turns my head towards him. “Look at me.”
Once I meet his gaze, it’s over. I’m lost in his dark brown eyes, and I fear I’ll never find my way back to reality.
“Do you remember what I told you when we first met?” He interweaves his hand into mine, rubbing small circles on my thumb with his.
Shaking my head, my mouth shifts slightly to one side of my face.
“I told you you’re one of a kind because violet isn’t a common color in nature.
We’re told to fit in and blend in with the crowd.
You weren’t made to fit in or blend in with the crowd.
You were born to stand out. In a crowded room full of people, you'd be the first person I’d notice. Do you know why?”
“N-no.” Tears continue to stream out of my eyes like a steady, flowing river.
“You have these piercing blue eyes that make me fall in love with you all over again. You have golden hair that reminds of the sun when it shines brightly on a summer day. You’re the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen. Whoever tells you you’re not deserves a good ass-kicking.”
I laugh with my mouth closed, hiccuping repeatedly.
“You’re one of the most talented people I know.
You have an Instagram account entirely dedicated to books.
You grew a community of people who share your love for books, and I think that’s amazing.
And you did it all on your own. You’ve accomplished so much, and we’re not even seniors yet.
You need to give yourself more credit and stop being so hard on yourself.
You’re the most important person in my life.
I care about you a lot, and I hate seeing you like this. ”
I’m mesmerized by him. It’s as if I’ve been put into a dreamlike trance I’m unable to snap myself out of.
“Here’s what’s going to happen. We’re going to get up, and I’ll help you freshen up.
You’re going to go out there because it’s your sweet sixteen.
You’re going to celebrate it because you deserve to.
You deserve all the happiness that exists in this world.
” He gets up off the floor, offering both of his hands to me, so he can help me up.
I slide my hands into his and push off using my body weight, standing upright. My body brushes against his, leaving him breathless. I look up at him and smile.
“Why are you looking at me like that?” he asks, grinning from ear to ear.
“Sometimes I believe all of this is a dream.”
“What do you believe is a dream?”
“Us.”
“This isn’t a dream because I’m standing here in front of you.” He grabs a dry washcloth, dabbing it on my face to soak up the tears lingering on my face.
I put my arms around him, burying my head into his chest. “Thank you.”
“For what?”
“For always being there for me.”
“That’s what boyfriends are here for.”
“But you’re special.”
“Oh, really? Why’s that?”
“You’re a secret.” I giggle in a cute way that makes him smile so big his face might freeze that way forever.
“I thought you didn’t like that I’m a secret.”
“I didn’t at first, but I like it now. You’re my secret. You’re. All. Mine.”
“And you’re mine.” He kisses the top of my forehead.
“I’ll always be yours, Grayson Becker.”
I fix my dress, using my fingertips to make all of the wrinkles disappear.
When I look up, I notice his mouth hanging open before he clears his throat. He takes a moment to soak in my natural beauty, scanning me from head to toe. Partially sticking out his tongue, he bites his lip and raises his eyebrows.
When I fully meet his gaze, a little smile tugs on the corners of my lips. “What?”
He lets out a smooth breath. “You’re so beautiful.”
I walk up to him, kissing the tip of his nose. “I love you.”
“I love you more, Angel.” He puts his hands on my shoulders. “C’mon, let’s go celebrate your birthday.”
Seeing my reflection in the bathroom mirror, I notice how prominent the bruise on my face is. “Wait, I need to cover this thing up.”
“I can do it. What do you need me to do?” He offers with no hesitation whatsoever.
“Go over to my desk, and grab the lightest shade of concealer you can find. Can you get the hot pink sponge that’s shaped like a teardrop, too?”
Rummaging through the drawers of my desk, he finds a lighter shade of concealer and my teardrop-shaped sponge.
“Damn, you’re fast,” I say.
“I don’t mess around.” He opens the concealer. “Okay, what do I do with this?”
“Can you place three dots on the top of my cheekbone where the bruise is?”
He nods, placing the palm of his hand on my neck and his thumb underneath my chin, so he can tilt my head up. He gently places three dots of concealer where I told him to. “What now?”
“Blend it in with the sponge.”
“Sounds easy enough.” He takes the sponge and lightly taps it onto my face, so the concealer blends into my skin.
I smile at him. “Thank you for doing this for me.”
“Stop thanking me for doing the bare minimum. I’m telling you, if your mom didn’t scare the shit out of me, I’d be hunting her down and yelling at her for what she did to you.”
“I’d appreciate that, but it’s not necessary.”
“Has she ever hurt you like this before?”
I shake my head. “She raises her voice at me a lot, but she’s never laid a hand on me until tonight.” I gulp. “Maybe if I just kept my mouth shut, this wouldn’t have happened.”
He tilts my head down, so our eyes are at the same level. “Don’t you dare blame yourself for this. This isn’t your fault, Vi.”
“Can I ask you something?”
“You know you can ask me anything. I’m an open book.”
“Were you scared when your dad hurt you for the first time?”
“I was terrified. I mean, how would you react if the person you looked up to the most abused your trust and your body? I thought it was my fault. I was convinced there was something wrong with me, but I accepted that it wasn’t my fault. It was always his.”
“I would love nothing more than to yell at your dad for what he’s done to you.”
“Honestly, I’d love to be able to witness that.
” He smiles so big, blinding me with his perfectly white teeth.
“You know, you’re so easy to talk to about this stuff.
I talk to Noah and Xander about it, but it’s different with you.
There’s this energy you give off that makes it easy for me to tell you everything. ”
“I feel the same way. It’s also because I don’t really have any friends, except for you.”
“I’m your boyfriend,” he corrects me.
My arms circle around his neck. “You’re my best friend and my boyfriend.”
“Well, I’m honored.” His cheeks gradually turn more pink with each minute that goes by.
Smiling like a total dork, I stand on my tippy toes to kiss the tip of his nose until his lips meld onto mine.
He runs his hands down to both of my hips. “Wow, this dress is silky.” He studies my dress before his eyes land on my face. “I’m happy you chose to wear this.”
“Why?”
“I think you know why.”
What is he talking about? Oh, hold on. Is he talking about what I think he’s talking about? There’s no way.
“We can’t do that.”
“We can’t do what, exactly?”
“You know exactly what I’m talking about, Gray.” My eyes grow wide.
He opens my hand and flips it over, running circles with the pad of his thumb. “Do I though?”
Pressing my lips together, I close my eyes for a few seconds. “I don’t think we’ve had a proper conversation about this.” I gesture to the both of us with my hands.
“You need to be more specific, Vi.”
“I’m not ready to have sex with you,” I blurt out.
Why did I say that out loud?
His mouth slowly opens and closes as a lump goes down his throat, raising his eyebrows. “Noted.”
“Am I reading you wrong? I swear I’ve been getting the sense you want to, but I’ve been too scared to speak up about it.”
We head out of the bathroom, ending up back in my bedroom.
“Of course I want to.” He grabs my hand, guiding me to sit next to him on my bed. “But, I don’t want to do anything yet, especially if you’re not ready. The last thing I’d ever want to do is pressure you into doing something you don’t want to do.”
Throwing myself onto him, one of my arms wrap around his neck with my hand landing on his back. The other arm shoots straight up, my hand resting on his shoulder. “Thank you.”
“Again, you’re thanking me for doing the bare minimum.”
I kiss him on the cheek. “Gray,” I whisper in his ear.
“Yeah?”
“Do we really need to go out there?”
“No, not if you don’t want to.”
“Good, because I’d rather stay here with you.”
“Okay.” He pulls me further onto the bed, so I’m sitting next to him. “You don’t think you’re going to be missed at your own birthday party?”
I shake my head, exhaling. “No, I really don’t.” Pursing my lips out, I turn my head towards Grayson.
“What’s up?”
“Could tonight be the night where I unwrap you?” I smirk.
“How much do you want to unwrap?”
“Just the top half. Is that okay?”
“That’s more than okay with me.” He gives me a smile that makes me feel like I’m ice cream melting in the Florida heat.
“I need you to do me a favor though,” I say. “Can you lock the door?”
“On it.” He gets off the bed, rushing over to the door. After he locks it, he jumps onto the bed and lands directly on me.
I groan, whipping my head back onto my pillow.
He runs his fingers through my hair. “Sorry. Did I hurt you?”
“I wasn’t expecting you to jump on me.” I get a bad case of the giggles.
“Maybe I need to jump on you more often, so I can hear you laugh like that.”
My breath hitches, causing my giggles to come to a halt. It’s all because of the way he’s staring at me.
He leans in and cups my face with his hands. Before I know it, his lips claim mine. His lips are soft and gentle. It’s as if I’m kissing a small, plush pillow. His hands leave my face and make their way to my waist.
My heart is beating so loud and fast. I wonder if he can hear it. I hope not.
He pulls me onto his lap, my legs ending up behind him. His hands are exploring the silky fabric of my dress. “Do you want to take my shirt off, or is it okay if I do it?”
“You can do it.”
I feel like I’m watching a romance movie where there’s a scene that becomes slow motion because he’s taking off his shirt incredibly slowly to build the anticipation.
Once his shirt is off, I’m unable to speak. A lump travels all the way into my throat.
Wow.
My fingers travel down from his neck to his abs, tracing the outlines of them.
“Having fun there?”
“Oh, definitely.”
“You’re so cute.” He kisses me on the forehead. “Happy birthday. I love you, Violet.”
“I love you more, Grayson.”