28. Jake
Twenty-Eight
Jake
Tahiti is a total bust. All I want to do is leave and despite the amazing location, I spend the entire fourteen hours I’m there in my hotel room trying to get in contact with Taylor.
I get that she’s pissed off. I get she’s probably shocked and confused as hell right now, not just that I have a wife, but also that I never told her about it. But to not even give me a chance to explain? The whole thing makes me pissed and anxious and worried about how I’m going to fix things.
But more than anything, it makes me wish to fuck I’d told her about Maggie in the first place. Explained the circumstances so she never had to walk into my house and see my so-called wife sitting there.
By the time we are making our descent into LAX, I’m grateful for the forty-eight hours off that I have. Hopeful that Taylor is here too, although I have no idea what her schedule looks like now that she bailed on our flight to Tahiti.
Rick and I clear the landing paperwork and make our way toward the customs together. He’s making small talk with one of the flight attendants along the way and from their body language, I’m guessing small talk isn’t the only thing they made while we were in Tahiti.
I can’t help but stare at the wedding band he wears and the way he doesn’t even try to hide it from her. It’s disgusting the way these guys carry on and while I’ve taken advantage of the whole “isolated in a foreign country with a bunch of cute coworkers” thing before, I’ve never slept with someone who was married.
But just as I think this, it hits me that actually, I’ve been doing that this whole time with Taylor. And while my marriage was absolutely over as soon as it began, and I’ve never actually considered myself a married man, let alone taken a wedding ring off to hide it, Taylor doesn’t know any of this. All she sees now is a guy who acted like he wanted her, but also had a wife she didn’t know about.
The whole thing makes me feel even shittier than before, especially knowing how hard it is for Taylor to trust people, how badly her ex-husband treated her to create that. And how much I’ve now broken that trust.
“Fuck,” I mutter, scrubbing a hand across my jaw.
Rick turns to look at me. “Everything okay?” he asks, seemingly concerned. I’ll admit, he was a nice guy, great to fly with and if he wasn’t so open about cheating on his wife, I’d probably be happy being friends with him.
“Yeah,” I say, even as I’m shaking my head.
Rick laughs a little. “Well, cheer up,” he adds. “Salary increases kick in next pay cycle.”
“What?” I ask, confused. Although I’ve flown for Crescent for a while now, I haven’t been permanent staff for very long and I’m still getting used to how it all works.
Rick glances at the flight attendant he was chatting to before turning back to me. “Salary increase that comes with a good evaluation,” he says. “Usually eighteen percent for captains, fifteen for first officers,” he adds. “A nice bonus.”
“Does everyone get that?” I ask.
Rick shrugs. “Everyone who gets a good evaluation, yeah.”
“So…” I start, but my words are cut off by Theo Jameson walking up.
I roll my eyes as he greets Rick with a handshake, and the two of them start talking about their recent trips and what they got up to. Even though I’ve heard it all before, it’s disgusting listening to the way they talk about their fellow crew, comparing notes on who they’ve slept with, so I move away and make my way toward the customs line for pilots and crew.
After I’ve collected my car from the parking garage, I head straight over to Taylor’s, hoping she’s home. But there’s no sign of her, her car is still missing from the garage, so I head back home to my place to get changed and try and work out a plan for how to get in contact with her.
While I’m there, I check my emails and notice one from my lawyer, letting me know the divorce papers have now been filed and should be processed quickly and finalized by the end of the month.
I exhale in relief, glad this whole thing is nearly over. Just as I’m about to log off, I notice an email from Maggie too. Curious, I open it to see what she has to say.
Dear Jake,
I just wanted to let you know I got notification about the papers being filed. I won’t fight this anymore and I’m sorry if I created trouble for you. I know what we did was rash and probably not the best move, but I did truly want to make things work. I know you don’t believe me, but I never meant to cheat on you, and I’m sorry that I hurt you. I’d like to think one day we might be able to be friends.
Maggie.
I roll my eyes and delete the email, having no desire to be friends with my ex-wife and not just because she cheated on me and then made the next year of my life a living hell by refusing to sign the divorce papers.
She’s a part of my life that I want firmly in the past because she’s the one part of my life that I regret more than anything. The regret has nothing to do with her and everything to do with what we did, but I still can’t find a way to forgive her, to accept her apology and let her be a part of my life when all she does is remind me of the things I wish I’d never done.
I try calling Taylor again, but once more it goes straight to voicemail. Knowing I have only two days to try and sort this out, which might be even more impossible if she is somewhere on the other side of the world, I grab my keys and head over to the one place that might be able to give me answers.
When I walk into the main office in the hangar at the airport, Carrie and Charlie both look up. Charlie gives me a small smile and nod, while Carrie narrows her eyes at me. Neither of them are particularly hostile, but there’s definitely a reservation there that isn’t usually.
“Before you start,” I say, my hands up in defense. “Yes, I know I was a dick for not telling her about being married.”
Carrie stands, crosses her arms over her chest as she all but glares at me. “So it is true?”
I nod. “Yeah, but it’s complicated.”
“How?” she says. “I mean, you either are or you aren’t. It’s actually pretty simple.”
I take a deep breath as I shove a hand through my hair, knowing it’s not as simple as Carrie thinks, but not wanting to explain it to her in detail when I haven’t even had a chance to tell Taylor yet.
“Look, it’s a long story and one I’m happy to explain to you, but I’d really like to explain it to Taylor first, if that’s okay with you.”
Charlie stands now and mirrors his wife’s pose. “You still married?”
I exhale. “The divorce papers have been filed,” I tell him. “They should’ve been signed and filed a year ago, but she,” I pause before adding, “my ex was being a pain in the arse about it all.” I scrub a hand across my jaw, knowing this is far more than I expected to tell them. “It should be finalized by the end of the month.”
Charlie stares at me for a second or two longer before finally nodding as he uncrosses his arms and sits back down. “She’s in Alaska,” he says.
“Charlie!” Carrie yells. “Why did you tell him that?”
Charlie rolls his eyes as he looks up at his wife. “She needs to give him a chance to explain, Care, even you said that. He seems remorseful and technically he’s not going to be married soon, so…”
“So, you’re okay with him lying to her about it all this time?” she chimes in.
“Ah, guys,” I say, not really wanting to witness an argument about why I’m such a dickhead.
Charlie and Carrie both stop and look at me, Charlie seemingly relaxed, while Carrie is still giving off an “I hate Jake Campbell” vibe. I actually don’t blame her. On face value, it does look like I’m a total arsehole and she’d be right to protect Taylor from me. But it truly is far more complicated than what either of them think and I really just need them to give me a chance to explain it to Taylor so she can hopefully understand.
Scrubbing my hand across my jaw again, I say, “Look, I know this looks bad, seriously, I do know that.” I pause, shoving my hands in my pockets as I look from Charlie to Carrie. “But you need to know that it’s complicated, it’s not a simple explanation and also, that I haven’t been with my wife for over a year.”
“So you’re separated?” Carrie asks.
I nod. “Yeah, we are We have been for a year,” I tell her. “But it’s also more than that,” I add. “And like I said, I’m happy to explain it to you both once I’ve told Taylor.”
“Sounds reasonable to me,” Charlie says, placing a hand on Carrie’s arm.
She glances down at him before looking back at me, her face softening a little as she uncrosses her arms and loses a little of the hostility. “Are you really serious about Taylor?” she eventually asks, a look of worry on her face now.
I take another deep breath, letting it out in a long slow exhale. “I love her, Carrie,” I admit. “It terrifies me that I might lose her because of this.”
Carrie nods, offering me the tiniest of smiles as though she approves of my answer. “Okay, she’s away for another week,” she says. “She’s flying to New York and Boston, I think, after Alaska. I don’t remember all the details, but I know she’s back in a week. She’s staying at our place because she knows you’ll come looking for her.”
I nod, still trying to work out how I can get her to listen to me.
“When she comes back,” Carrie continues, her words a little cautious now as she looks at Charlie, who only nods. “We can set something up so you can speak to her.”
I let out the breath I didn’t realize I was holding. “Thank you,” I say. “Thank you for helping me, for believing in me.”
Carrie cocks an eyebrow at me. “It better be a damn good explanation, Jake,” she says, once again crossing her arms. “And I hope you realize you’ll be making this up to her for the rest of your life!”
I chuckle, grateful Taylor has these two people in her life. “Don’t you worry, I intend to.”
Two days later, I’m heading into the airport feeling better than I did when I was last here. While my problems have in no way been solved, at least I have a plan for talking to Taylor.
I know Carrie and Charlie are only looking out for her, and honestly, I’m glad they are. But I’m also really fucking glad they are willing to take a chance on me and help when it comes to talking to Taylor. We haven’t worked out all the details for how that will happen just yet, but I know it’s going to, and for now that is enough.
I grab the paperwork for my flight to Miami before heading into the lounge to sort through it. I’m flying with a Captain Reece Cook today, which is good. We haven’t flown together before, but I’ve heard he’s one of the good guys.
I settle down with a coffee as I wait for him to arrive. Behind me are a group of pilots, laughing and chatting about their upcoming flights and which flight attendants they have on board.
It’s gross listening to them, but I don’t move, just try to block them out. However, my ears prick up when I hear one of them say, “Oh, did you hear about Taylor?”
I feel my body stiffen, but force myself not to turn around, not wanting to give away the fact that I’m listening to their conversation. I have no idea what they’re about to say, no idea if it’s going to be about me and her or something else.
“No, what?” one of them says.
Whoever’s talking laughs as he says, “She lost her shit with her supervisor, walked out without even signing her evaluation form. Said she was done.”
“What, so she quit?” someone else asks, and I feel myself holding my breath. Surely Carrie would’ve known if she’d quit.
“No, she hasn’t quit. She’s all talk when it comes to this,” the storyteller responds.
“So what was it?” the other guy asks. “A bad evaluation?”
“Nope, she got a great one, as always,” he says, a touch of bitterness in his voice. “Then again, it’s not hard when you sleep your way to the top, is it?”
There’s a collective laugh amongst the group and I have to physically force myself not to turn around and punch every single one of them in the face.
“So?” someone prompts.
“So, she’s not getting the eighteen percent contribution,” the jackarse telling the story continues. “Not enough money in the pot for her.”
“But we are, right?” someone else asks.
The storyteller laughs. “Of course we are,” he says. “We’ve worked hard, and we deserve it, don’t we?”
The rest of them all laugh, mutters of yeah, we sure do as they change topics and talk about something else.
Inside, my blood is boiling, an anger bubbling below the surface of my skin as I take in their words and the full implication of what these arseholes are saying.
Taylor, despite being a Captain, just like they are. Despite getting a good evaluation and having an excellent record and work ethic, doesn’t get the salary bonus these guys do. Why? Because she’s a female? Because everyone thinks she’s slept her way to the top and doesn’t deserve to be there? Doesn’t deserve the recognition and reward that these fuckheads get?
I roughly shuffle the paperwork together before standing, my heart pounding in my chest at what I’ve just discovered. Turning, I cast a glance over the group of pilots who were talking about Taylor and me, instinctively know who the arsehole was that started this conversation.
Because when my eyes meet Trent’s, he gives me a smirk, instantly recognizing me. He probably knows it was me sitting here all along as he started that conversation, the fucking prick.
I want to walk over and punch him in his smug fucking face. But I know that isn’t going to help Taylor, will probably only make things worse. So, taking a deep breath, I turn away and walk out of the lounge, my brain turning over this new piece of information and how best to deal with it.
Just as I reach the plane, an idea starts to form. An idea that I know is a huge gamble, but one that might just help Taylor get the respect and equity she deserves.
And maybe, just prove to her how much she means to me as well.