Chapter 31
It had been a long and busy day for Bethany, but it had been worth it. She was smiling widely as she pulled into the stableyard, and her smile grew even wider when she spotted Clive’s SUV parked up near the house.
She wondered how long he’d been waiting there. Not too long, she hoped. It would have been lovely to spend the day with him, especially as she hadn’t seen him yesterday, but this had been too important to put off and she was sure he’d agree it was good news all round. In fact, she could hardly wait to tell him.
She grabbed her handbag from the passenger seat and locked the car doors before heading happily into the house.
Clive was sitting at the kitchen table, Viva at his feet. He had his head in his hands but as she shut the door behind her he looked up and she saw the bleak expression in his eyes.
‘Clive, what it is it? Has something happened?’
Oh, lord! What if Jennifer had given him bad news last night and he’d needed her? She’d been out all day. She should have told him she was going, given him the chance to tell her if he wanted to talk to her.
She pulled out the chair next to his and took hold of his hand. It lay unresponsive in hers and she squeezed it gently, hoping he’d show some sign of affection in return.
When he didn’t she frowned. ‘What’s the matter, Clive? You’re worrying me.’
His gaze ranged over her as if he was only just seeing her. ‘Why didn’t you tell me?’ he asked her.
She straightened. ‘Tell you what?’
‘You had a visitor today,’ he said. ‘Some builder. He assumed I was Mr Marshall. I hear you’re planning to demolish the stables.’
She groaned inwardly. It was meant to be a surprise! Stupid Mr Belper telling Clive like that.
‘That’s true,’ she said reluctantly. ‘But you see?—’
She leaned back, startled, as he placed a piece of paper on the table in front of her.
‘Got an estate agent coming to value this place, too.’
She stared at the reminder she’d scribbled on the pad after speaking to the estate agent on the phone.
‘What are you doing with that?’ she asked, bewildered.
‘I found it,’ he said. ‘And I also found the message on your answer machine from Rachel. So you’ve changed your mind about sending Barney to Folly Farm? Or have you decided it’s no big deal if the Shetlands are separated after all?’
Bethany glared at him. ‘Are you seriously telling me you’ve been snooping? You listened to my answer machine messages? Where the hell do you get off doing that? You had no right.’
He sighed. ‘I know,’ he said simply. ‘I shouldn’t have done it. I hold my hands up. But, Bethany, how could you do such a thing, especially behind my back? I thought you were better than this.’
The injustice gnawed away at her. ‘Did you indeed? So that justifies you listening to my private messages? And you must have been looking in the dresser, too, because that phone pad was in the cupboard.’
He at least had the decency to look ashamed, but she was so disappointed in him she didn’t know where to begin.
‘I thought I could trust you,’ he murmured.
She glared at him. ‘You thought you could trust me? I think it’s me who should have the trust issues around here!’
‘Hang on,’ he said, ‘I may have listened to a message I shouldn’t have, but you’ve been arranging all this stuff without even mentioning it to me. The builder reckons he can start work in six weeks. Six weeks! You’ve not left much time to rehome all the animals, have you? I suppose that’s why you’ve lowered your standards and have decided Folly Farm is suddenly good enough. Any port in a storm, right?’
‘I don’t know how you’ve got the cheek,’ she said. ‘I’m not the one who can’t be trusted around here. And I’m certainly not the only one keeping secrets!’
He stared at her. ‘What do you mean by that?’
‘You and Jennifer! Don’t tell me there’s nothing between you because I know there is.’
Actually, she’d almost persuaded herself that she’d been imagining the whole thing. Her talk with Daisy had reassured her that Clive simply wasn’t the sort of man to do such a dishonourable thing, but knowing he’d been spying on her had made her think perhaps she’d been na?ve. And now, looking at the expression on his face, her heart sank as she realised she might genuinely be onto something.
‘What makes you think that?’ he said weakly.
It was hardly the outright denial she’d hoped for, and she pulled her hand from his.
‘I’m not stupid,’ she said coldly. ‘I saw the way you were watching her at Monk’s Folly that day. You looked pathetic. Like a lost little puppy.’
She was being cruel now and she knew it, but she was hurt and bewildered. She couldn’t believe she’d been planning to surprise him with so much good news and all the time he’d been snooping on her and lying to her.
‘There’s nothing between me and Jennifer,’ he said quietly, staring at the table. ‘Nothing.’
‘Look at me and say that,’ she said tearfully.
With evident reluctance Clive faced her.
‘Go on,’ she said. ‘Say that again.’
He took a deep breath. ‘There’s nothing between me and Jennifer.’
His voice sounded odd, and she had the strongest feeling he wasn’t telling her the whole truth.
‘And was there ever?’
There was no mistaking the stricken look in his eyes and the way his cheeks reddened slightly.
‘No,’ he said slowly, making it so obvious he really didn’t want to answer that question that she was incensed.
‘Oh my God! You’re lying,’ she whispered, hardly able to believe it.
‘I’m… That is…’
‘You know, I’m such a bloody fool,’ she said, running her hands through her hair in despair. ‘First Glenn, then Ted. Why should you be any different?’
‘Bethany,’ he said, reaching for her hand, ‘it’s not like that. I swear to you.’
‘Don’t bother,’ she said, pushing his hand away. ‘You know what? I was so excited today. I was going to tell you my big news and I thought you’d be over the moon but instead this is what I get. You’re a liar and a cheat. I wish I’d never been stupid enough to fall for you.’
‘I’m—I’m sorry.’
‘Save your apologies. Shall I tell you something, Clive? I was planning to stay in Tuppenny Bridge. Despite everything that’s happened, despite all I’ve been through in this town, I was going to put that behind me and make a new life here with you. I was such an idiot. The estate agent? Yes I’d been in touch with one because I was looking for somewhere to buy round here. I might not want Whispering Willows, but I wanted to stay in this town for you. That’s how much I cared about you.’
Clive swallowed, seeming unable to put into words what he wanted to say. At last he managed, ‘Cared for me? Past tense?’
Bethany blinked away the tears. Of course she still cared for him. Did he really think she could change her mind about that so quickly? But she was too hurt to reassure him, so she simply stared at him, saying nothing.
‘Well,’ he said at last, ‘at least we both know where we stand now.’
‘Do we?’ she said, amazed that he could believe that. ‘Lucky you, because I’m still waiting for an answer. What went on between you and Jennifer? And is it still going on? What was I? A bit of amusement on the side?’
Clive shook his head slightly. ‘You know, I never wanted you to stay here just for me, Bethany. I never expected it, and I wouldn’t have asked it of you.’
Was he really saying he didn’t want her to stay? After everything that had happened between them was she really so unimportant to him?
‘You said you wanted me to stay!’ she protested.
‘But not for me! Don’t you see? It would never work. This had to be about you and what you wanted for your future. Finding where you could be happy, not for my sake but for your own.’
‘Well,’ she said, ‘I guess I’m rethinking that right now. Fact is, you’re not what I thought you were at all, so why would I stay? Thank goodness I’ve got somewhere to go.’
‘Back to Helena’s?’ he asked sadly.
She nodded. ‘For now.’
He got to his feet. ‘I see. Well, I hope things work out for you, Bethany.’
‘And that’s it, is it?’ she demanded. ‘You’re going to walk out of here without telling me the truth? You’d rather I left here for good then admit what’s going on with you and Jennifer?’
‘Do you really believe there’s anything going on?’ he asked her.
‘I know you’re lying about something,’ she told him. ‘There’s something you’re not telling me, that’s for sure.’
‘Seems we’re both good at keeping secrets then, doesn’t it?’ He sighed heavily and glanced down at Viva. ‘I take it you want me to keep her?’
Bethany was struggling to keep her composure. She certainly couldn’t risk looking at little Viva.
‘That would be appreciated,’ she said, hoping her voice didn’t betray how utterly broken she was feeling.
Clive scooped Viva into his arms. ‘Will you keep in touch with Summer?’ he asked. ‘Let her know what’s happening? You don’t have to contact me, but she needs to know. Our first priority has to be the animals in our care.’
‘I’m aware of that,’ she said stiffly. ‘Although really, that’s between me and Summer, isn’t it?’
She heard him take a sharp breath and closed her eyes briefly, determined to hold back the tears that were threatening to fall at any moment.
The next thing she heard was the back door closing, and then there was only the sound of her heart breaking.