215 Days #2
She was doing what all her past boyfriends had done to her: lying about what she was feeling, making Danny doubt his instincts. She felt guilty but had no choice; she had to do a better job of hiding her emotions. She had to leave no trace. “Let’s go play the dirty diaper game!” she yelled.
She flashed her happiest grin, determined to swallow the emotions deep down until she could get home and scream-cry into her mattress alone. She jauntily led Danny across the house to a table of diapers with the numbers one through six written on them, under a sign that read, Dirty Diaper Game!
“And what…does this entail?” Danny asked.
“It’s fun and I’m weirdly good at it, not to brag. You just look at the candy bar that’s melted inside each diaper and write down what kind of candy bar you think it is.”
“Why?”
“That I cannot answer.”
Danny watched Rhea carefully inspect a brown stain inside a diaper, thoughtfully smell it, and write down: “Diaper #1: Twix” on a little piece of card stock.
“Hey, no peeking. How’re you ever gonna learn if you’re cheating off me?”
“You’re right, this is an important life skill and I should take it seriously,” Danny said, and Rhea laughed too loudly, projecting the image of someone who was having a great time.
They scrutinized and smelled all the diapers, hiding their answers from each other as they wrote down their conclusions. They folded their cards and slipped them into a mason jar marked Name That Poo!
“Okay, I hope smelling all those dirty diapers made you hungry,” Rhea said as she led him to another sign that read: Guess the Baby Food!
“Now we get to taste all this mysterious baby food and write down what we think it is.”
“Why?”
Rhea laughed. “You’re asking the wrong question, have you not been to many baby showers?”
Danny confessed that most of the baby showers in his orbit were for women only.
“Well, my friends are modern. They always do coed, so men get to do all this pointless bullshit too.” Rhea chuckled as if she was joking, while a possible flash of concern moved across Danny’s face.
“I’m totally kidding, I’m having a great time, I love baby showers,” Rhea said, trying to remove the expression on Danny’s face.
“Clearly,” he said, and they looked into each other’s eyes, each seemingly daring the other to say what they were really feeling.
Rhea did not take him up on the dare and began spooning unappetizing goo from various baby food jars onto her plate, and said, “We can play this one together if you want.”
“Yes, please. You’re a pro, I don’t wanna compete with you.”
“That’s wise, ’cause I’d crush you.”
They slowly sampled each color of mashed food while discussing the flavor, the mouthfeel, and the finish.
“This one starts, like, almost mango…but then I’m getting a hint of pineapple?” Danny said.
Rhea tasted it and immediately said, “That’s apple banana strawberry.”
“Well, I trust your baby food palate more than mine.” Danny tried another and gagged. “I don’t even know—it tastes like dog shit.”
Rhea tasted it. “That’s ham and gravy.”
“You’ve been to way too many baby showers.”
“Tell me about it,” she said with a touch of frustration in her voice. She covered it with an excited gasp as she looked out the window. “Oooh, let’s go outside and make stuff!”
She dragged Danny out the back door. Zoe was in the yard, sharply addressing a group of children, including her own daughter and Chichi, as they sat at an arts and crafts table.
“…If you draw on the tablecloth again, I will kill you—” Zoe looked up at Rhea and her boyfriend. “Well, hello there…. So, this is the famous Danny Beckett? I’ve heard a lot of very good things about you.”
Rhea wished Zoe would play it cool and pretend like Rhea had not been continuously talking about Danny for months, but for that to occur, Zoe would need to have been born with human instincts.
Rhea told Zoe they wanted to decorate a onesie, and Zoe set them up with seats at the table in front of two white onesies, a cup of markers, and several tubes of paint.
“May the best man win,” Rhea said.
“Oh, this is also a competition?” Danny asked.
“Usually, the mommy will select her favorite onesie at the end of the shower. I mean, that’s happened at, like, eighteen of the showers I’ve been to anyway.”
“Well, then…prepare to die, Darby.”
“Not to freak you out, but I’ve won like ten times.”
“What’d you win?”
“Usually a candle, but I’m not in it for the candles, I’m in it for the glory…. Thank you for coming with me, by the way. Everyone loves you.” She was genuinely starting to feel a bit better from the combination of feigned happiness and just being around Danny.
“It’s my pleasure. Truly. I like your friends.”
He put his arm around her and kissed the top of her head. She detected a hint of I’m sorry they all had maternity shoots and you’ll never have one in his embrace, but she was probably just being paranoid.
“Ahree, what’s his name?” Chichi asked as she sidled up next to Danny.
“This is Danny…. Danny, this is Ada’s daughter, Chichi.”
“Nice to meet you, Chichi.”
Chichi looked unimpressed.
“Can I hear a joke?” Chichi asked.
“Why yes you can…. What do you call a baby potato?” Rhea asked.
“What?” Chichi was already laughing.
“A small fry.”
Chichi thought for a second, then laughed hard. Danny was so charmed by Chichi that he started laughing too.
“Like a French fry?” Chichi clarified through giggles.
“Exactly,” said Rhea.
“How do we know the ocean is friendly?” Danny asked Chichi in that tone one uses when setting up a joke.
“How?” Chichi asked excitedly.
“Because it always waves,” Danny said while waving.
Chichi giggled and said, “I’ve never heard that one! I wanna put a ocean on my onesie!”
She plopped her onesie down on the table next to Danny, looked up at him with her hypnotizing brown eyes, and asked, “Do you know how to draw a ocean?”
“I can try,” Danny said, “but I’ll probably need your help.”
Rhea watched Danny draw with Chichi.
“What color should the water be?” he asked.
“Um…blue!” Chichi said.
“How about the sky?”
“Um…green!”
“Wow, a green sky, I’ve never seen that before, that’s gonna look really cool. Do you wanna do the sky and I’ll do the water?”
Rhea was slightly taken aback by how good he was with Chichi.
She had not quite been expecting him to turn full curmudgeon and wave his cane at all the little brats, but she was not prepared for him to be this good with children.
Chichi was practically sitting on his lap.
After his rant in the hot springs, she assumed he would be polite and curt in the presence of a child, trying to end the interaction as soon as possible, but she had assumed incorrectly.
“Should we put a mermaid in your ocean?” Danny asked.
“Yes! I love purple mermaids!”
“How ’bout I draw her tail and you color it in?”
“Yeah, okay, I’m gonna color it purple.”
“That’s a good idea,” Danny said with an endearing chuckle.
A thought knocked on the door of Rhea’s mind, and after trying to shut them out all morning, she finally let one in: What if Danny does want kids and he just doesn’t know it yet?
The simplicity and genius of the thought floored her.
As she watched him gently guiding Chichi, patiently drawing with her, it was suddenly glaringly obvious.
Everything about Danny screamed paternity: He was patient, kind, loyal, and hardworking.
He camped, he gardened, he fixed stuff with his hands, he cooked, he cleaned, he knew how to take care of a pregnant woman; he was basically already a father, he just needed some kids.
What if somewhere, deep down, Danny did want kids, and he was just scared and hiding the truth from himself?
Was Rhea expending all of her energy in the wrong direction?
Did she need to change her mind, or did Danny need to change his?
Was that why they miraculously met on a golf course and magically ran into each other in Big Sur?
Was that why the goddess sent an earthquake the first time they had sex and why her mom kept sending hummingbirds?
Was the universe trying to tell her Danny Beckett was meant to be a father, and Rhea Darby was born to guide him toward his rightful path?
He was robbing himself of the greatest experience a human being can have: unconditional love, grandchildren, community, and seeing the world through new eyes. He might have missed out on all of it, but Rhea was going to try her darnedest to save him.
They really could have everything: the perfect life, the perfect family, the perfect maternity shoot. She had to be subtle in her persuasion due to his sharp instincts, but maybe she could get him there.
Chichi watched a mermaid appear underneath Danny’s marker and said, “Wow, you’re so good.”
Rhea smiled in agreement; he was so good, and he would be an amazing father. He just needed a firm nudge, and she just needed some time to prove all his reasons for not having kids were ridiculous; 215 days would have to do.