Chapter 15 Carrie #2
I send a dirty look his way. “We regret to inform you that a further ten points have been deducted from your balance. What did I say about the whole ‘baby’ thing?” I turn my attention to Lewis.
“And as for you, buddy—your theory doesn’t stack up.
People with the same last name are definitely not supposed to get together. It’s probably illegal.”
“You have to admit, though, we’ve got some weird voodoo shit going on here.” Lewis circles the air. “First the whole Lois Lane situation, and now two Wolinskis. I mean, fuck!” His eyes widen. “I’m gonna need to find me a girl with a cool name, too.”
“How about a Hamilton?” Lane grins into Lois’s hair.
“That’s a dude’s name!”
We break into laughter. Lois untangles herself from Lane and leans into me.
“Lane and Carter are heading out tonight, so me and Becca were thinking we’d have a sushi night. Wanna join?”
My knee-jerk reaction is to say thanks, but no thanks—outside my book club, I try to avoid hanging out with people, because friends are like guys—sometimes you get too close and end up hurt.
Then I remember that I need to check in with my mom tonight, and that’s always a downer.
I could do with a few hours outside my own head.
“Sounds great.”
“Amazing! My place at seven? Want me to ask Carter to pick you up on his way back with Becca?”
“I’ll drop her,” Donovan cuts in.
I stare at him. Why is he so obsessed with being my personal chauffeur?
“Thanks, but I got my bike fixed. I’ll cycle.”
“I don’t know what freaks me out more—the idea of you cruising around on that piece of trash, or you riding across town in the middle of the night.”
“You really are the perfect little husband, aren’t you?” I bat my lashes at him.
“There’s a party at Tod’s, by the way.” Lewis brightens. “How about it, Donny?”
Hearing his fangirl pet name used like that throws me off. I turn away and catch Lois staring at me a little too intently.
“Well, since my wife is failing to uphold her wifely duties…” Donovan shakes his head. “I guess there’s nothing for it but to hit the bottle.”
“May you choke on your own puke,” I mutter.
“You two are total relationship goals.” Lewis beams. “I could spend the whole day listening to you, but we gotta hit the road, Don. Coach will be waiting.”
Lois slips her hand into Lane’s. “See you later, Carrie!”
I wave goodbye and fling my bag over my shoulder. Donovan is pulling on his T-shirt.
“Enjoy your night, Donny!”
Deep down, I think him getting back to his old horndog ways would actually be good for me—it would reset things between us, at least. Take me back to the good old days, when just the sound of his name was enough to make me retch.
But the way he’s looking at me now is a reminder that the good old days are long gone. He grabs his bag and starts backing away.
“Be ready at six forty-five,” he says.
I hate this guy.
ONCE I’VE SUCCESSFULLY DITCHED DONOVAN on the sidewalk, I head on into the building and knock on Lois’s door—all by myself, like a big girl. This is me, showing some balls. Just like I did when I turned Donovan down and refused to try out the comfy bounce of his back seat.
“Come on in!”
Stepping into the apartment, I spot Becca immediately and start at the sight of two old women perched on the couch. They look like twins.
“Carrie, meet Hope and Prudence,” Lois calls out from the kitchen sink. “Friends from water aerobics class.”
“In case you didn’t guess, they’re twins,” Becca explains, clearing off space on the coffee table.
“Nice to meet you,” the two women chant.
“You too.”
Lois waves me down. “Take a seat!”
I drop my bag and settle down on a purple wool footstool.
Lois nods at it. “Like it? Lane called it fugly!”
I finger the fabric. “It’s cute.”
“She definitely wears the pants here,” Becca whispers. “I swear, one day Lane is going to wake up and find himself in a Barbie mansion, and it’ll be too late to save him.”
“Love is blind.” One of the grandmas nods sagely. “How are things working out with his brother’s room?”
“We’re getting there,” Lois says. “He gave the bed to his car guy, and he started emptying the closet, which is something.” She shrugs.
“It’s hard, but he’s working on it. We’re keeping the desk and shelves—he’ll need them for work.
Can’t wait for the day I don’t have to step over piles of gross scripts on my way to the living room. ”
Thanks to Becca, I know all about this—how Lane lost his shit, and how that forced Lois to crash with me for a few months.
It’s great to see how supportive she is of Lane and his grief, but no matter how heartwarming they may be, it’s still not enough to make me want a relationship of my own.
What if Lois ended up dumping him later down the line? He’d be completely broken.
Lois reaches for her phone. “Know what sushi you want, Hope?”
Note to self—Hope = orange hair. Prudence = silver.
We order our food, and my two friends settle down around the coffee table.
“Sooo…” Becca glances at me, and my shoulders stiffen. “Lois had a lot of interesting things to say about you and Don…”
“Which one’s Don?” Hope asks.
“The cute blond one?” her sister tries.
“No, that’s Lewis.”
“They’re all scrumptious,” Prudence says. “Each and every one of them.”
Becca stares at me hard. “Well?”
“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”
“Oh, please!” Becca snorts. “Spill.”
I jump up. “Where?”
Prudence titters. “I think that’s what they call a diversionary tactic.”
Lois mouths a silent apology at me.
“Come on, Carrie. Spit it out. Since when are you guys BFFs?”
“Since you suggested he hit me up for ‘book boyfriend’ classes?”
I watch her smile fade as she takes in my air quotes.
“What?” She turns to Lois. “I don’t remember that. Do you?”
“Kind of. Back when school started, he asked us for tips on being less… him. Remember?”
Becca gasps. “Fuck! I forgot all about that!” She frowns at me. “So, wait—he actually meant it?”
“I guess he actually did! And by the way—thank you so much for the opportunity, Rebecca.”
I flash her my fakest smile. She crosses and uncrosses her legs awkwardly. She has the good grace to look embarrassed, at least.
“So, wait—you’ve been his relationship coach since September?”
I’m about to reply when she starts to giggle. And it goes on way too long.
“You done?” I ask, reaching for my soda.
“I’m sorry.” Becca dabs at her eyes. “It’s just too insane to picture.”
She’s actually crying with laughter. And that pisses me off. I should never have let us get into this conversation. It feels like she’s stepping over a boundary, somehow. Like she’s intruded into me and Donovan’s own little world. There’s no way I can tell them about Amelia, though.
I fix my gaze on Becca. I’ve done nothing wrong. It’s not like I’ve betrayed him, or anything. But still—I can’t stand watching her make fun of Donovan like this, and it must be written all over my face, because her laughter trails off.
“Oh, cut me some slack, Carrie! This is exactly the kind of thing you would usually find too funny. Didn’t you used to say he was a total egomaniacal moron?” She rolls her eyes. “You did. You said he had big-dick energy, and not in a good way.”
“Big-dick what now?” Hope perks up.
“Okay, guys.” Lois raises a soothing hand. “Take it easy.”
“I never said that,” I correct, but Becca is on a roll.
“We are talking about the same guy, right? Don-fucking-Wolinski?”
“People change, Rebecca. You know—they grow, they gain a little maturity…”
“And experience,” Prudence adds.
This evening just gets more surreal by the minute.
“Holy shit!” Becca jumps to her feet. “I don’t believe this. She’s falling for him!”
“What?” I ignore the finger she’s jabbing in my face. “Who is?”
“You! You’re actually falling for him! Carrie’s in love with a Campus Driver!” she crows.
“Shut up!”
“The end of the world is nigh, ladies! Hold on to your panties—shit is about to get real!”
Lois laughs. “Becca, seriously—you need to chill. Your face is all purple.”
Detective Rebecca sits back down, and I glare at her.
“I think it’s cool you guys are hanging out.” Lois smiles. “You make a nice change from the usual fangirl.”
“You say ‘usual,’ but think about it—when was the last time you actually saw him with a girl?” Becca grins.
“Some charming young woman in particular must have caught his eye, then,” says Hope.
“Even the flightiest of men end up coming home to roost,” Prudence agrees.
“It’s so weird,” continues Becca, “don’t you think? He’s not had a single hookup since school started. None of the usual Wolinski situationships. Care to explain why, Carrie?”
“None of your business,” I snap. “And anyway, how am I supposed to know what Donovan does in his spare time?”
“Lewis told Lane that when he’s not hanging out with you, he’s busy reading erotica,” Lois pipes up.
I gasp, offended. “Hey! It’s not erotica, okay? It’s romance!”
“So, just to recap—SHU’s resident womanizer is now your boyfriend,” says Becca. “Oh—and he reads books now, too.”
The girl is relentless.
“He’s not my boyfriend. He’s not even my friend,” I hiss.
Not my friend?
I have no idea what I’m saying now. I’m normally pretty good at lying to myself, but it’s getting harder and harder to ignore what’s happening between us, and I have to be honest—no matter how weird it is, there’s definitely something there.
Something that goes beyond our teasing, something more than just hooking up.
I thought I could use him to scratch an itch, but it isn’t working—or more like, it’s working too well.
“Oh my God.” Realization dawns over Becca’s face. “They slept together!”
“No we didn’t!” I yell, a little too fast. I can feel my cheeks flushing.
Prudence pulls her chair closer. “Is he any good between the sheets?”
“It’s the twenty-first century, honey,” Becca says kindly. “The expression you’re looking for is ‘Is he a good lay?’ ”