CHAPTER THIRTY-EIGHT OSKAR
CHAPTER THIRTY-EIGHT
OSKAR
Dawn slips through the blinds, casting gentle rays of light across Kai’s face.
I’ve been awake for a while, watching him sleep.
He’s on his back with the sheet gathered at his waist. The steady rise and fall of his chest is a rhythm I could lose myself in.
I don’t want to wake him, so I hold a finger barely above his skin and trace his strong shoulders, powerful chest, and abs that are better than any I’ll ever have.
His eyes flutter open after a while. For a second, there’s the same uncertainty I’ve noticed before. Then recognition dawns, and a slow smile spreads across his face.
“Morning.” His voice is rough with sleep.
“Morning, baby.” I push up on an elbow and lean over to kiss him. “How did you sleep?”
He stretches, and the way his back arches sends a surge of heat through me.
“Better than I have in months.” His eyes meet mine, and I notice something different. There’s still vulnerability, but now it’s mixed with trust.
We turn onto our sides, and after a morning kiss, Kai asks, “What happens now?”
I comb my fingers through his hair. “Whatever we want to happen.”
“No. I mean how we’ll do this. Rules and boundaries.”
“What are you thinking?” I ask, still afraid of scaring him away.
He takes a moment to gather his thoughts. “First, I won’t disappear anymore. Physically or emotionally. If I’m struggling, I tell you. And if you’re having a hard time—”
“I’ll let you know,” I say. “And we’ll talk about things instead of shutting down. Also, we check in every day, even when we’re on the road. People who love each other shouldn’t go for days with no contact.”
He nods, rustling the pillowcase. “Promise. And unless something really unusual is going on, it should be more than a quick text.”
“Deal.” I kiss his forehead, a little nervous about my next question. “What about… other people? I know open relationships are a thing, but—”
“I can’t do that. I don’t want anyone else.” He swallows hard. “Do you? Is that why you asked?”
“Never. It wouldn’t work for me, either. You’re all I need.”
He moves closer until our chests touch. Our hearts are beating only inches apart.
“Privacy?” he asks. “Sometimes I need to be alone. You know, to reset. But it’s not about pushing you away.”
“I understand. I’m a Swede, so I know how important quiet time is. As long as it’s about looking after ourselves and not avoiding each other, I’m fine with it.”
“That’s a relief.”
I give him another quick kiss and ask, “What about people finding out? Our teams, fans, whoever?”
“We tell them when we’re ready. Some of your teammates already know you’re dating a man. For me, Nico knows for sure. Hell, everybody else probably does too. I haven’t told them, but I want to do it now.”
“When you’re ready.” I pause, then say, “I have an idea about the public. Let’s just be ourselves and live our lives. There are plenty of guys in the league who are out, so we don’t need to make a big announcement.”
“Agreed.”
I hesitate for a moment, but that’s not us anymore. “About your neurodiversity. I’m usually good at reading you, but I won’t always get it right. Please tell me if you need something I miss.”
His eyes soften. “I will.”
We roll onto our backs, and Kai snuggles close, resting his head on my shoulder. The world dims as I sink back into sleep. When I open my eyes again, the light is brighter, but we still don’t move. Instead, we share slow, sleepy kisses, content to let the day wait for us.
Hunger eventually drives us out of bed. As we move around my small kitchen making breakfast, there’s a new ease between us, a gentle silence broken only by soft touches and knowing looks. This is what we’ve worked for, and what we’ll fight to keep.