17. Willow
Willow
“Get your ass back to bed,” Sawyer says louder than he needs to. My stomach has been in knots all night, even after several trips to the toilet to throw up everything I ate yesterday. I hardly slept, so I have a terrible headache this morning.
“I have to watch Jade,” I mumble, reminding him of my job.
“Wills, you have fucking food poisoning. I’m sure Beck and Jade would rather you rest and get better than throwing up all over their house.”
Sawyer and I went out to eat yesterday to try a new restaurant in the next town over, and something did not sit right with me, unfortunately.
“Beck has to work today, though.”
“Beck is a big boy. He can find someone else to watch Jade, or he can take the day off. He’ll be fine. I’ll call him now, but you need to go back to bed.” He grabs the acetaminophen and a glass of water off the counter and hands them to me.
Knowing I’m not going to win this argument when Sawyer is in big brother mode, I take the medicine and go back to my room. I swallow two pills and change back into my sleep shirt before climbing into bed.
I can hear Sawyer talking with someone. I assume it’s Beck. I feel terrible leaving him hanging today, but Sawyer is right. I’m no use to anyone with the way I feel.
I pull my blanket up to my chin and drift back to sleep.
I have no idea how long I’ve been asleep before I hear voices in the hallway outside of my room. I barely have time to open my eyes before there’s a gentle knock on my door. I know immediately it’s not Sawyer because he wouldn’t knock. He also wouldn’t try to be quiet.
The door opens, and Jade peeks her head inside before quickly pushing all the way in. Beck follows behind her.
“Sorry if we woke you,” he says softly. Sawyer probably told him about my headache, which actually seems to be mostly gone right now.
“It’s ok. What are you guys doing here?” I ask.
“We wanted to check on you,” Jade says, walking to the side of my bed and putting her chin down right in front of me.
“That’s very sweet of you.” I look behind Beck but don’t see Sawyer there. “How did y’all get in?”
Beck shrugs. “I have a key.” Of course, he would have a key to Sawyer’s house. Sawyer probably has a key to Beck’s house, too. “We brought you some Gatorade and popsicles. We put the popsicles in the freezer.”
He opens the bottle of Gatorade and hands it to me. I sit up a little bit and take a small sip.
“You didn’t have to do that, but thank you. Sorry I couldn’t make it today.”
“Hey, don’t even worry about that. You need to recover, and it’s nice having an extra day with Jade.”
“Daddy took me to get pancakes for breakfast! They had chocolate chips,” she tells me.
“That sounds yummy.”
“It was. But it would’ve been better if you were there.” Gah, this kid is so sweet.
“Before I leave, we’ll have to make sure we go out for pancakes.” I smile at her before I take another sip of Gatorade.
“Are you feeling any better?” Beck asks.
“Yeah, I think so. Haven’t thrown up in a few hours. Hopefully, I can keep this down.”
“Good.”
Beck hands Jade his phone with a game pulled up, walks around to the other side of my bed, and kicks his boots off before climbing in bed with me.
I’m stunned into silence.
Beck Sullivan is in my bed.
But not only that. He slides up behind me and wraps his arm around my waist.
“What are you doing?” I ask quietly.
His breath tickles my ear when he answers. “Lying here with you.”
“Why?”
“Because I want to.”
He presses his body up against me, and I let myself relax into him.
Jade pays us no mind as she focuses on her game.
I’m painfully aware that I’m only in my underwear and a T-shirt right now, but Beck doesn’t seem to care.
His hands don’t wander down my body like I wish they would.
If I didn’t feel so weak right now, I would lead him to do just that. Even when I’m sick, I still want him.
I don’t know how long he holds me like this, but eventually I drift back to sleep to the sound of his steady breathing in my ear.
The next time I wake up, I’m alone. For a second, I wonder if I dreamed of cuddling with Beck, but then I hear voices coming from the living room and know he was actually here.
Feeling much more energized, I slide out of bed and put on some sweatpants.
Crossing the hall, I head to the bathroom and brush my teeth before splashing water on my face.
Once I feel alive again, I walk down the hall to see who’s here. I’m surprised when I see Sawyer sitting at the kitchen table, Jade on the couch watching a movie, and Beck standing at the stove stirring something in a pot.
Beck sees me first and smiles, which causes Sawyer to turn around.
“Hey, Wills,” Sawyer says. “Feeling better?”
“Much better. Thank you.” I wonder what time Sawyer got home.
It’s much earlier than he would normally get home.
I immediately start to panic and wonder if he came home when Beck was in my bed.
But after a closer look, neither of them looks upset, so I can only assume that’s not the case.
If Sawyer had walked in on us in a compromising position, they would not be sitting here smiling right now.
“What are you making?” I ask Beck before I sit down at the table.
“My mom’s chicken noodle soup. I thought you might want some.”
Beck is making me soup in Sawyer’s kitchen? This is way too crazy for me to think about right now.
“Thank you. It smells amazing.” Then I turn to Sawyer. “What are you doing home?”
“Came home to make sure you were ok. Beck told me he was going to come check on you, so I went to work this morning and took off when I could. He insisted on making you soup.”
I look toward Beck, but he keeps his focus on the pot in front of him. “That’s sweet of you both, but I think I just needed to sleep it off.”
“Well, I’m definitely marking that restaurant off my list. I will not be going there again,” Sawyer says.
“Yeah, me neither.”
Beck grabs a bowl from the cabinet and puts some soup in it before grabbing a cold Gatorade from the fridge and bringing them both to me. “I’ll believe you’re better once I know you can keep this down.”
I chuckle. “Yes, Dad. Sawyer’s bad enough. Now I’ve got both of you being all overprotective.” He slightly pushes my shoulder. He’s trying to be playful, but I can tell he did it softly, as if I might break if he touches me too hard.
“Shut up,” Beck says quietly.
“Excuse us for wanting to keep you alive, Wills,” Sawyer says with an eye roll.
“I’m not gonna die from food poisoning.”
He shrugs. “You never know.”
I shake my head and pick up my spoon. The soup looks and smells amazing.
I can’t help but think how lucky Jade is to have a dad like Beck.
Homemade chicken noodle soup, cold Gatorade, and lots of rest and attention.
Sawyer tried his best when I got sick when I was younger, but it was usually canned soup and a bottle of Sprite.
I can’t complain, though. I’m still alive, so it must’ve worked.
Beck serves himself some soup and gets some for Jade before he calls her to the table. She sits down between Sawyer and me.
“Hey, kiddo. Sorry your day was ruined by sitting around here all day,” I tell her.
“It wasn’t ruined! I had so much fun.”
“Oh, well, ok then. Never mind,” I say with a laugh. Of course she would make today a good day.
“I don’t like that you were sick because you didn’t get to play with me, but I still had fun, and Daddy let me watch movies all day, which never happens.”
“Ah, yes. Makes sense. That does sound like a good day,” I say.
After we eat our early dinner or maybe late lunch, whatever we’re calling it, Sawyer clears the table while Beck packs away the rest of the soup. Once they’re done, Beck says, “Well, we’re going to take off. I think I’m gonna take Jade on a sunset ride.”
I stick out my lower lip in a pout. “I’m jealous. I want to do that.”
He smiles. “Once you’re better, I’ll take you both out.
” His hand seems to inadvertently touch the side of my face before he moves to tuck a strand of hair behind my ear.
My eyes go wide. It’s an innocent touch, one I’m sure most people wouldn’t think twice about, but it feels like so much more with him. And especially in front of my brother.
He quickly drops his hand and then looks over at Sawyer, who is luckily not paying any attention to us.
He mouths, “Sorry,” before walking away.
He grabs Jade’s things. I still can’t believe they spent most of their day here just making sure I was ok. I certainly didn’t expect it, but it still makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside, which doesn’t help with our friends only relationship.
“I’ll see you guys tomorrow,” I tell them both.
“Let me know in the morning how you’re feeling. If you need another day, it’s totally fine,” Beck says.
“I appreciate it, but I think I’ll be good.”
He nods, and I wave goodbye from my spot in the kitchen. Once they’re gone, I make my way to the couch and beg Sawyer to bring me a popsicle. Now that I’ve got something in my stomach, I realize how hungry I am. Obviously, I don’t want to push it, so a popsicle will have to do.
I’m flipping through the channels when a text pops up on my phone.
Beck: You know I’ll still pay you even if you need another day
Willow: I would never ask you to do that, but I appreciate it. Thank you for today.
Beck: Thank you for letting me take care of you. I was so worried when Sawyer called me this morning.
Beck: Also I found this picture on my phone. Jade must’ve taken it
A picture of him and me curled up in bed appears next. The angle is a little off, which confirms that Jade did, in fact, take it. But Beck is behind me, his arm around me. We’re cuddling. My heart flutters. He held me when I was sick. Dammit. He’s gonna make me fall in love with him, isn’t he?
Willow: You’re making this whole being friends thing really difficult.
Beck: I’m sorry. I can’t help myself when I’m around you.
I don’t text him back because I don’t know what to say.
Part of me knows I need to keep him at arm’s length.
It’s what’s best for both of us and Jade and Sawyer.
But the more emotional part of me wants to tell him to give in to this feeling.
We both want it. We’re both consenting adults.
I hate this flirting that leads to nothing.
I want him. All of him. But he won’t let me have it.
When I climb back in bed, I can still smell him on my sheets. I miss him already. I wish he were here to help me fall asleep again. Unfortunately, I will probably never have a moment like that again with him. It’s too bad I was too drowsy to enjoy it.