Chapter 19
Pain swamped Ryan’s consciousness with every breath. At first, he hadn’t even realized the connection, only the steady ebb and flow of agony. But with awareness came patterns. A knife blade at his ribs, sawing at his concentration.
He also isolated a sound and a warm grip on his hand. He focused on that small heat, absorbing the comfort it brought him.
“It was my brother Raoul,” she was saying, her voice choked with tears. “No one else makes brass knuckles like that. He’s trying to make it look like a bear attack.”
Frankie.
“Yeah, we got that.” Simon’s voice was hard. “Why the fuck would he attack your father?”
“To become alpha. And he wants a war with you.”
“And why haven’t you stopped this? That’s what you promised, isn’t it? You begged me to delay so you could take care of things internally. Does this look like it’s been taken care of?”
“I didn’t think he’d attack our father!” Frankie said. “I didn’t think it was possible. Wolves can’t go against their alpha.”
“Apparently, wolves can,” Simon growled.
“It’s the serum. I should have seen it before. Brady defied a direct order in the sewers. Everyone’s more aggressive while on it.” She sighed. “Even I never contemplated taking over the pack until I became a hybrid.”
“Not your fault,” Ryan said, his voice rusty as pain burned through every word. But he didn’t stop. “Everyone waits too long to get help.”
“Ryan!” she cried out, and she gripped his hand tighter.
“You’re awake,” Simon said, and there was relief in his tone. “Can you shift?”
He couldn’t even open his eyes. But he did have the strength to squeeze Frankie’s hand. And damn, the pain from speaking was burying him.
“Ryan? It’s Frankie.”
Yes, he knew.
“You’re hurt pretty bad, but it’ll heal if you shift. Can you do it?”
Of course, he could. He reached for the energy state.
He pictured himself as a grizzly and tried to slide into it.
But the pain burned through him, fracturing his focus.
Worse, his mind kept replaying everything that had happened the last two times he’d shifted.
Torn apart by Nanook’s hybrids. Shot in the sewer.
Didn’t matter, he told himself firmly. But the moment he reached for the energy state, pain shredded his intention.
Then another voice intruded. A female’s voice with the authority of a doctor. Must be Hank’s woman, Dr. Lu from the CDC. “I’ve got to give him some painkillers. He’s in so much pain, there’s no way he can concentrate.”
“If you drug him, he can’t focus enough to shift.” Simon spoke logically, as usual.
“He needs rest. Look at him. Do you really think he has the energy? Even without the pain, he’s exhausted.”
“Doctor—” Simon began, but Frankie interrupted them both.
“Just ask him what he wants.”
Smart woman. It was one of the reasons he liked her so much. But it was hard to think, even harder to speak. Still, he forced it out because Frankie believed he could. “No drugs.”
“Detective Kennedy,” the doctor was saying. “There is no point in macho heroics. You’ve done your job—”
Had he?
“—now you need to recover.”
“Emory…Wolf?”
“Alive, thanks to you.” Simon again. “Do you remember what happened?”
Ah hell. He didn’t want to remember. In truth, he was trying hard to not remember getting gutted.
Again. But he knew his duty, so he forced himself to report what he could.
Scoping out the warehouse. Emory attacked.
The fight. He used short sentences. Clear words.
He nearly passed out before he was done, but he made it.
And once he’d finished, Simon took up the tale.
“We got there at the end. Alyssa shot the ones on you.”
Alyssa could shoot the wings off a gnat. Thank God she was on their side.
“Then we carried you both here for the doc to patch you up.” His voice dropped to a deeper register. “You’d feel a lot better if you just shift.”
He knew that. He wanted that. But he couldn’t grab hold of the process. What was wrong with him?
Then there was a commotion nearby and another voice, this one deep and familiar.
Hank. The quiet Zen master who could kick major ass when needed.
He spoke to Simon, but everyone heard. “Raoul sent a message. Did it old school on parchment, written in blood, wrapped around a rock, and thrown at our door.”
“Charming,” the doctor drawled.
“Message says, ‘Return Emory and the traitor Francesca.’”
“Not much of a negotiator, is he?” Simon answered. Then when no one responded, he sighed. “Anything else?”
“Just a time and place for the exchange. Dawn. A park on the edge of wolf territory.”
“He’ll attack here first,” Frankie said. “Sometime tonight.”
“Isn’t he worried about the cops?” Simon asked.
She sighed. “He wants to expose shifters to the world.”
Silence. Then, Simon spoke with an incredulous tone. “Just how crazy is your brother?”
Ryan felt her grip go painfully tight, but when she spoke, her voice was flat. “I don’t even recognize him anymore.”
“Hopped up on his own poison?” That was from the doctor, condemnation in every syllable.
“I don’t know. Maybe.” Frankie’s voice dropped into resignation. “Probably.”
“Didn’t anyone tell him that drugs are bad?” Simon asked. It was a rhetorical question that no one bothered to answer. And then Ryan felt a grip on his shoulder. “Do whatever you need to do, Ryan.”
Thanks. Assuming he could figure out what that was.
He heard several people leave, but Frankie wasn’t one of them. He kept a grip on her hand and felt her drop her forehead to his arm.
“I should have listened to you,” she said. “I was stupid to think I could handle this on my own.”
He wanted to stroke her hair. He needed to open his eyes and look at her, but speaking with Simon had drained him.
It was all he could do to just lie there and touch her.
She seemed to understand. Or maybe she needed to talk to him.
Either way, she stayed and started whispering to him.
Simple things at first. He dozed to the sweet sound.
But eventually, her words took on different meaning, and he roused to listen more clearly.
“We’re alone now. Dad’s in the next room recovering, and everyone else has gone to prepare.
We’re in the upper floor of your headquarters.
It’s kind of nice. Not exactly the mansion my parents have, but comfortable upstairs and useful downstairs.
Who’d have guessed that bears were more practical than wolves? ”
Anybody. It was well known that wolves like to put on a show. Every wolf alpha in a major city had a mansion, whereas the bears just liked a cozy, protected den.
“Growing up, I was the daughter of an alpha. They told me there was nothing I couldn’t do. I just had to work hard enough.” She snorted. “What a load of crap. I’ve never worked harder in my life and I’m still out here and called a traitor.”
“What happened to pulling together as a pack?”
She looked up when he spoke. He’d managed to finally open his eyes because he was pulled to look at her face. He wanted to see the emotions there, to catch the shift of grass-green eyes and the sweet curve of her mouth.
“The pack is only as strong as its weakest link.” Her lips quirked in a bitter twist. “I guess I’m the weak one here.”
“Or your brother.”
She shook her head. “He’s the leader over there now. That means he’s the strongest.”
He focused, lifting his hand to stroke across her tear-streaked face. “I was told to protect my family.”
“And you have.”
“My family didn’t protect me. My parents can’t even say the word ‘shifter.’ Nanook tried to kill me. And even the cops I work with day in and day out don’t know what I really am.” He wiped at her wet cheek. “I say we throw out all those stupid sayings and start making some of our own.”
Her mouth curved into a smile. “Like what?”
“How about, I’ve got your back, if you’ve got mine.”
She tilted her head, nuzzling her cheek deeper into his palm. “Do you?”
“Tried to.”
“Yeah, my bad.” She glanced across his shoulder to the hallway where—he guessed—she could see her father through the open doorway. “You protected my father anyway.”
“I still serve and protect. What I’m looking for is my family.”
She arched a brow. “The Griz don’t support you?”
“Not one went up against Nanook when he tried to kill me. He might have been holding them back. I don’t know.”
“But you don’t trust them now.”
“Simon and Alyssa are new. They seem okay. Vic, too. But I’ve been going it alone since Nanook betrayed me.” And look where that had gotten him? Nearly dead in a sewer. Nearly dead at an abandoned factory. “Going solo isn’t working for either of us.”
She nodded but if anything, her expression turned even more sober. “Why do you trust me?”
Good question. There were obvious reasons why he shouldn’t.
She was a wolf and she’d bailed on him at the storage area.
But he’d understood why and would probably have done the same if he were her.
She’d saved his life in the sewer and tried to protect him at Hazel’s home.
That counted for something, but it wasn’t enough to explain why his instincts kept pushing him to trust her.
“Remember when I told you about roaming the woods? When I was a teenager?”
She nodded. “While your grandfather fished.”
“I was amped up from shifter hormones, but something about the place centered me. Life was chaos, or at least it felt that way, but the smell of the pine and the whisper of leaves made me feel stronger. Like the storm was outside instead of inside. And I could deal with that.”
“I get that.” She pressed her lips to his palm in a quick kiss. Then she pulled back enough to explain. “It’s what a good pack feels like. No matter what’s happening in your life, there’s that solid center inside.” She blew out a breath. “I haven’t felt that since turning hybrid.”
“Because your brother started taking over the pack?”
Her gaze turned thoughtful. “Maybe. I just assumed it was because I’d changed into a monster.”