Chapter 74 My worst fear – Briar
MY WORST FEAR
brIAR
Morning comes too brightly once again. The ice outside reflects the early morning sunlight, and I let out a groan, pulling the thick comforter up and over my head, trying to give myself a few seconds reprieve from facing the day.
It’s been two days.
Two days have come and gone since Koen left me in the woods. There are so many unanswered questions, and in typical Koen fashion, he didn’t stick around to give any answers.
I’m anxious, my stomach is in knots, and I’ve been walking around this house like the floor is made of glass.
The first morning here, we arrived early.
Liam brought Remi and me to a bedroom where she slept for a couple of hours in my arms while I kept watch.
It’s Koen’s room. I’m sure of it. Everything is neat and clean; there’s no clutter; dark woods and walls are offset by the sunlight streaming in through the wall of windows facing the lake.
And the faint scent of him lingers on the sheets and in the air.
I don’t know what to expect. I’d been a prisoner the night before. Was I their prisoner still?
Guest, captive, unwanted intruder—exiled to this house in the woods to live out the rest of my sorry existence caged and alone?
All of it bleeds together into a deep pool of anxiety that’s made its home deep within my chest. I’m on edge, tense, ready for my world to come crashing down at any given moment…
even though the days have been—peaceful.
I sat in the bedroom for hours that first afternoon, doing my best to appease an energetic Remi, with nothing to entertain her, watching the door and wondering if it was locked.
I didn’t have it in me to try, and I certainly wasn’t brave enough to venture out of it with Remi’s safety at stake.
The sliding doors are locked, from the inside, but she doesn’t have a jacket or shoes, and it snowed while she slept, a couple of inches quieting the world around us.
Sometime in the early afternoon, a knock sounded at the door. I stiffened, instinctively reaching for my daughter and pulling her close, though she failed to notice the imminent threat of danger.
The door cracked open, and Liam leaned casually against the frame. Easy in a way that made me even more wary. “The door is not locked, you know; you two can come out.”
I opened my mouth, but words didn’t come, because what do I even say?
But Remi didn’t have to be told twice. She slipped from my grip, running for the door and darting out under Liam’s arm.
He tracks her, smiling softly.
I rise slowly, my motherly instincts screaming at me to run after Remi, but all too aware of the danger standing in my way.
Liam’s gaze trails back to me, green eyes softening when he sees the fear in mine, reaching up to rub the back of his neck uncomfortably.
“Listen,” he says, remaining in the doorway. “You’re safe. Nobody here is going to hurt you. Not last night, not this morning. You don’t have to worry about that, okay?”
I want to believe him, and I genuinely want to believe that none of them would hurt Remi now that the secret is out, but I’m not certain the same can be said for me. I saw that look in his eyes.
“Where’s Koen?” I ask, the words coming out lower and scratchier than intended, my throat dry from the stress.
“He’s not here.”
I catch the unspoken addendum. Nobody here is going to hurt me. The jury is still out on Koen.
Liam reads my face and shrugs. “Koen’s… complicated, but he’ll come around. Give him time.” He pushes the door open wider. “Hungry?”
That was two days ago, and I still haven’t seen a trace of Koen. He’s left me to linger in this frozen purgatory, trapped inside this beautiful house with the rest of his family. I’m cautious, too well aware of every rule I don’t know, every expectation I’m bound to break.
I’m trying my best to keep Remi quiet and out of their hair, but no matter how hard I try to shield her, she’s wormed her way into all of their rooms and hearts.
She beats Liam in endless games of checkers; he swears she’s cheating, and she cackles every time he pretends to throw the board in frustration.
Alex is able to find Remi’s favorite cartoon on the television, and sometimes I catch Liam or Alex watching it after Remi’s lost interest and left the room.
Rory found some markers and paper in one of the drawers, so while Remi is occupied, happily scribbling nonsense, I leave her with Rory. Hurrying to the bathroom and nearly having a heart attack when I come back to find my daughter coloring in Aidan’s tattoos.
Aidan O’Rourke, Irish Devil Enforcer.
“Remi!!!” I chastise, racing over to pick her up, but Aidan raises a hand, stopping me.
“It’s fine,” he says, before pointing to an area she’s missed. “I think we need some more green over here, Rem.”
I shoot Rory a look, who’s got her hand clasped over her mouth looking like she’s trying not to die from keeping the laughter in.
She’s great. I spend a lot of time with Rory. We have a lot in common; she’s a figure skater and has certainly spent a fair bit of time in a dance studio. We bond over relentless practice schedules, and overly-critical instructors—and complicated O’Rourke men.
But nothing can make me forget that I’m in Koen’s world now, under his roof and at his mercy.
Even if everyone else is kind, Koen’s shadow is never far off.
Like a guillotine blade hanging over my head, the torture of it is far worse than anything he could’ve concocted back in that grimy little room.
By the end of the second day, the lake house had… against my will… grown more comfortable, familiar, and dare I say, even safe.
That is… until he walks into it.
Aidan, Liam, and Rory have just disappeared upstairs. They’re leaving early in the morning for a Breakers game tomorrow afternoon. It’s a long drive, but Rory promises me they’ll be back tomorrow night.
I’m sitting in the large plush armchair by the fire, hands curled around a mug of hot chocolate. Remi is at my feet, wholly consumed by the last game of checkers she has going with Alex on the rug. She’s dragging it out with the threat of bedtime hanging over her.
The front door opens, and suddenly he’s there.
Koen’s cold eyes scan the room as he moves through it, bringing the frost in with him from outside.
His dark eyes fall on me, and I hold my breath, while they linger for the briefest of seconds before he looks away.
There’s no anger, no rage; there’s just—nothing.
Koen continues walking through the main floor and up the stairs, as if I don’t even exist.
I stare after him.
Alex is quiet, and I feel his eyes on me.
I’ve been sitting here, waiting for Koen’s anger, preparing for it, but this—his… indifference? The way he looked right through me as if I didn’t even matter… barely a blip on his radar, ignoring me, ignoring Remi?
It was my worst fear come to life.