19. Raphael
Raphael
19
I’m finding it hard to concentrate on my run when thoughts of Lily’s soft lips from last night keep distracting me. I wasn’t lying when I voiced my intentions, when I told her how badly I wanted to lay her out and bury my face in her pussy until I suffocated in her pleasure.
And God, when she said do it…how ready I was to take her up on her permission. But the dumb angel on my shoulder shouted louder than the devil’s encouragement that her approval was because of passion fueling her brain and not logic.
I also wasn’t lying when I told her that when we cross that bridge, and we will, that’s it. There will be no turning back, no second-guessing decisions, no hiding from a chance to heal. Because I’ll help her heal. With every kiss, every gentle stroke of my tongue, every tender caress of my hands, and every passionate thrust of my body inside hers will wash away the pain she’s endured until she only knows me and my touch.
The door to the indoor gym opens, and Enzo struts in with a slightly noticeable limp. His one arm rests in a sling while he waves a tablet in the other. I turn off the treadmill, grab a towel to wipe the sweat from my face, and take a big swig of water.
“Evie found this late last night,” he says as he hands me the tablet. “Let me tell you. That woman does her best hacking after a couple of mind-blowing orgasms. She does this one move that—”
“Enzo.” I interrupt with a quick look. “I’m not really in the mood to hear about your sex life with Evie.”
Enzo smirks, and I realize my mistake too late. “Someone got a bad case of the blue balls today?”
“Someone want to lose their balls?”
“And here I thought killing the doctor would have put you in a good mood. Did Lily not like her gift?”
“She liked it.”
“Then what’s wrong?”
“We kissed and—”
“You kissed? Whoa! Hold up. First off, Dominic owes me a hundred bucks. I can’t wait to shove this in his face. He’s going to flip—”
I tune the big idiot out and instead focus on the report in my hand. I hate to admit it, but if sleeping with Enzo gets this level of intel, Evie’s welcome to spend every second in the big blond man’s bed. Hell, I’ll offer to chain him to the bedpost if it helps.
The Los Renegados was a large cartel controlling nearly all of Columbia, but when their leader was killed in a war among cartels, they dissolved. That was nearly five years ago, not long after they bought and sold Lily. It leaves me wondering if she had been taken after their war…if the Los Renegados weren’t around to sell her too, where would she have gone? I hate to admit it, but while there’s no denying her past is terrible, it could have been worse. She could have died.
The very idea makes me sick to my stomach. In less than a week, Lily and Mei have become such an integral part of my life that I can no longer imagine one without them in it. I always felt like something was missing but could never put my finger on it. So I just ignored it or filled the hole with other vices, like alcohol and women, until I no longer felt it.
When Michael made the choice to pursue a life with Rose and Liam, before we knew who she was, I accepted my fate. I accepted that whatever was supposed to fill that hole would never come. And I was fine with that. Or at least I was after a night I drank myself into a blacked-out slumber.
The relief I felt when Rose’s true identity came out and I was relieved of my duties as the heir wasn’t as freeing as I thought it would be. The hole remained. That feeling of something missing grew larger. So once again, I threw myself into distractions, anything to numb the feeling. Until a pair of blue eyes opened in a dark room and filled the void.
“So no one is left who harmed her except Xiao?” I conclude, handing the tablet back to my friend.
“Yeah. No one that Evie could find, anyway.”
“Dom sent me a text last night that he’s looking into a possible Triad hideout. Have you heard anything more from him?” It’s beyond frustrating knowing the last man to pay for hurting Lily keeps evading us.
“He checked in earlier this morning. Said not to worry, that he won’t be late for Christmas Eve dinner tomorrow. He knows Aunt Alice will kill him if he’s not there.”
It’s not uncommon for Dominic to go off on his own to track down a lead. But Xiao’s silence about Lily and his daughter being with us is concerning. Especially after his failed attack on Enzo. I don’t like for any of us to be unaccounted for. Because from the way Lily describes the Triad leader, his daughter is his most prized possession, and he’s just crazy enough to do whatever it takes to get her back.
Enzo’s phone beeps, and he glances at it before softly smiling. “Got to go. Duty calls.”
“Is that Evie’s nickname now?” I laugh while I walk over to the bench press.
As he leaves the gym, Enzo mimics my laughter in a mocking tone, telling me I touched a sore spot.
I’m sliding weights onto the barbell and getting ready to do a set when there’s a soft knock on the door.
“Lily,” I say her name with a smile when I see her standing in the doorway.
“Hi.” She’s been a little shy all morning, which is kind of cute in an endearing sort of way.
“Did you need something?” I consider reaching for my discarded shirt but throw the thought out when I catch her eyes running down the length of my chiseled and slightly damp chest. The gray sweatpants I’m wearing hide little, not that I’m little in that way, so when her eyes snag on the outline of my dick, her face explodes red as she bites on her bottom lip. Which only makes my dick jerk in my pants.
Jesus. The hold this woman has on me. I’m very sure that the moment she touches my cock, I’ll come like a teenage boy being touched for the very first time. It’ll be embarrassing as hell, but nothing I can’t fix with a mind-blowing orgasm. Or three.
“Um, I still have nothing for Christmas, and I don’t want to arrive empty-handed. Especially since your family has gone out of their way to buy presents for Mei and me…and then there’s your...gift from last night.” Lily shrugs, trying her damnedest to avoid my eyes and body. “I don’t know. I just want to do something nice after...I don’t know, something normal I guess.”
I can think of a few nice things she can give me, but I’ll keep those thoughts to myself…for now.
“How about this?” I wait until she looks up at me and smile reassuringly at her. “After I finish my workout, we can order whatever you want.”
“Are you sure? I don’t have any money to give you or anything—” She stops abruptly and wrings her hands together.
“If you are about to offer your body to me, I don’t want that either,” I tell her. “Not in exchange for a favor at least…as tempting as that is.”
She blushes hard. “I-I…Raphael, I—”
An idea comes to mind, and I interrupt her. “Actually, there is something you can give me.”
“Okay,” she says hesitantly.
“A kiss under the mistletoe?”
Lily smiles softly. “I can do that.”
“Good. Now, will you come over here and spot me?”
She raises a brow. “Spot you?”
“Yes. You stand behind me and be there in case I need help.”
Her eyes take in the number of weights on the bar. “Raphael, isn’t a spotter supposed to be able to lift the same weight? There’s no way I could help you if you needed it.”
She’s not wrong. And to be honest, I didn’t need a spotter. I’m lifting a weight I’m comfortable with, but it’s giving me an excuse to keep her near.
“Then how about you act as inspiration?”
Lily shakes her head with an exasperated sigh but pushes off the doorway anyway and approaches. I lean back and slide beneath the silver barbell as Lily comes around to stand behind me. She stares down at me, fighting back a smile, but I don’t because it feels like I’ve won.
Feeding off the energy between us, I wink up at her, which breaks through her defenses. The most beautiful smile stretches across her face, framed by her blond hair. From this angle, with the room’s light behind her, she looks like an angel.
“You’re trouble, aren’t you, Raphael?” She whispers on a breath. It’s there in the depths of her ocean-blue eyes that reveal the woman fighting to return, and I can’t wait to meet her when she does.
“Sweetheart, you have no idea.”