CHAPTER 13
The clouds overhead were thin enough that I could see hints of the sun for the first time in over a week. Thorne’s hawk was circling high above on the hunt for prey, and the woods almost looked inviting for once instead of menacing. But I couldn’t stay focused on my serene surroundings.
Not when Thorne was stripping again.
That and the arrival of his two friends made the nerves in my stomach do somersaults.
He’d just placed his tie and blazer on a nearby rock and started to roll up his white shirtsleeves when he caught me staring. Our eyes locked, and I immediately wanted to look away in embarrassment. Knowing he’d only see that as weakness, I kept my eyes on him, praying my cheeks weren’t bright red.
At least he’d kept his shirt on this time. Those forearms, though. Why did it immediately become harder to concentrate now that they were exposed?
Annoyed at myself, I blurted the first thing I could think of. “What are they doing here?”
Thorne broke our stare to glance at his friends, which instantly allowed me to breathe easier.
“Riku and Oz have agreed to observe our training sessions. Every move you make at this academy is under scrutiny, so our sessions shouldn’t be any different.
Think of them as an audience waiting for you to mess up. That way, you’ll try harder not to.”
Great, just what I needed right now. An audience to witness Thorne handing my butt to me.
It was on the tip of my tongue to protest, but Thorne must have anticipated it, continuing before I could open my mouth, “The more you desensitize yourself to the constant pressures of performing, the faster you’ll acclimate.
Those who continue to cave under the pressure don’t make it.
There were nearly two hundred students my first year here.
That number was cut in half by the end of the year, then again the next year, leaving only fifty of us left.
Many quit, some died, and a few took their own lives.
But the number one reason why they failed was their inability to cope with the pressure.
It’s why the school board voted to incorporate a mentorship program this year.
Heartstone was losing too many students. ”
“And parents were beginning to complain,” Riku added, jauntily crossing his arms over his chest as he joined our group. When I glanced over at him, he gave me a saucy smirk.
Ignoring it, I asked, “So the mentorship program was a political move, then? To appease the families so they wouldn’t try to have the school shut down?”
“They would never do that,” Oz replied, coming to stand on Thorne’s other side.
Being this close to all three of them again was overwhelming, but I was too focused on the unsettling conversation to care right now.
Sliding his hands into his pockets, Oz went on, “The families might be upset about the fatality rate at Heartstone, but they would never have it shut down. They want the Conclave of Magic to be a success just as much as we do and wouldn’t dream of sabotaging our chance at earning spots on the council. ”
Oh. So the students weren’t the only cutthroat ones. Their families were too.
“This is political, then,” I said, lifting my gaze to Thorne again. I shouldn’t be surprised, but it still bothered me.
“Welcome to the top, Snowflake,” he replied in a tone that was almost mocking. “Up here, everything’s political.”
What did you expect, singalongs around a campfire? his eyes seemed to say before he turned and strode several paces off into the grass in preparation of our training session.
Riku called after him, “Snowflake? Cute, man, considering her name. Not as cute as Bambi, though.”
Done with all the insulting names, I snapped a little louder than planned, “Stop calling me Bambi. I’m not a male deer.”
Riku glanced at me in surprise, and I braced myself, certain he was going to put me in my place for reprimanding him.
Instead, his expression softened as if I’d said something adorable, and he cooed, “Aww, our Bambi has tiny claws, Ozzy. Too bad she doesn’t like to be teased, because it makes me want to tease her even more. ”
At the scowl I gave him, Oz shook his head with a quiet laugh. “Careful, Ri. Those claws aren’t as tiny as you think. I saw the damage they inflicted yesterday.”
“Well, it’s a good thing I like dangerous women,” Riku all but purred, dropping his arms as he sauntered toward me.
I stiffened at the mischievous glint in his dark eyes but valiantly stood my ground, even when he slid up beside me and breathed in my ear, “You can sink those claws into my back any time, Bambi.”
The comment annoyed me, but it was what he did next that shoved me over the edge.
I didn’t see him do it, but I didn’t need to.
Only an Air Elemental could make a sudden gust of wind flip up my skirt high enough to expose my entire backside.
I gasped and whirled on him, instant fury rushing through me when I saw that his gaze was fixed on my butt.
Staring. Teasing. Mocking. Humiliating me. Shaming me.
“No thong?” He tsked, amusement dancing in his eyes as they finally lifted to mine. “School-issued panties are so boring. I’ll have to send you a pair of—”
“You bastard!” I roared, so angry, so mortified that I was no longer thinking. Something else took over, a swift and volatile need that demanded I defend myself, that ordered me to fight.
I wasn’t going to take it again. I was done being made fun of. Done being ogled at like I was some freak show.
Dimly aware that I’d finally snapped under the pressure but was too enraged to care, I let the dark energy coiled inside me rise to the surface.
Thrusting my hand out, I willed it to come forth, to attack the gloating warlock.
Only, it wasn’t really Riku I wanted to attack.
It was Blaze, the warlock who’d pushed me closer and closer to the edge all week until I’d finally had enough.
But my moment of clarity came too late.
I’d already lost control. Already let the darkness burst from my skin like deadly obsidian knives.
Horrified, unable to do anything, I watched as the shadows streaked toward Riku. It all happened in an instant, so fast that he wouldn’t be able to block the magic in time.
Murdererrr, my intuition hissed.
No! I inwardly screamed, cracking, breaking as I watched history repeat itself.
An inch away from striking Riku in the chest, my magic suddenly exploded, the shadows dispelling in thick plumes of harmless smoke.
It looked like a wall had stopped my magic from hitting him, nearly transparent save for the streaks of light spidering over the surface.
Streaks that looked a lot like a static charge, like lightning.
Before I could feel any relief that my attack had been thwarted, something from behind slammed into me.
I fell forward and hit the ground hard, so hard that all the air left me in a violent whoosh.
Stunned, I didn’t do a thing as hands roughly flipped me over and pressed me into the grass, as a furious face filled my vision and bellowed, “Don’t you ever do that again, you hear me? ”
Shocked senseless, I stared into Thorne’s wild eyes, certain I wasn’t the only one who’d just snapped.
He gripped my biceps hard enough to leave bruises, his hands violently shaking.
But he wasn’t just angry. The longer he held me down, the longer his eyes bored into mine, the more I realized that he was terrified.
Terrified of what, I wasn’t sure. Of almost losing a friend? Of knowing history had nearly repeated itself? Of . . . of me?
I didn’t know why, but the thought of him being afraid of me brought no satisfaction. It made me feel ashamed. Made me feel . . . made me feel bad. Wrong.
“I’m sorry,” I choked out, struggling to breathe. Not from having the wind knocked out of me but from the massive amount of guilt sitting on my chest. “I didn’t . . . I didn’t mean to.”
The exact words I’d said to him nearly two years ago.
He flinched as if I’d struck him. An emotion flickered in his eyes so fast that I almost missed it. Almost.
Pain.
My words, my actions, had caused him pain. Again.
I was a terrible, terrible person.
“Thorne, you’re hurting her.”
Oz’s softly spoken words might as well have been a shout.
Thorne let go of me in a flash, jumping to his feet and stumbling back a few steps.
He stared down at me for another moment, emotion, so much emotion in that gaze.
Thunder rumbled in the distance, and I knew, just knew it was because of him.
Because of the emotions brewing inside him like a howling tempest.
Then, as if he’d slammed a wall down, the emotion vanished.
Stone cold nothingness took its place, and I shivered at the terrible sight, unable to stop my chin from quivering.
He took me in, something akin to hatred slowly bleeding into his eyes, and I died a little.
Died as those eyes looked away, dismissed me.
Without a word, he turned on his heel and stalked away. Comet shot from the sky to follow after him, and as they disappeared from view, a deafening silence fell over the grassy glen.
My eyes started to burn, but as usual, no tears fell. Expecting Thorne’s friends to leave as well, I blinked in shock when a hand laden with topaz rings lowered toward me. Riku’s hand.
An offer of help. From the person I’d almost killed.
I hesitated, certain he intended to make me pay for what I’d done.
Then again, I deserved whatever he threw at me, so I lifted my hand and placed it in his.
He easily pulled me to my feet, then gave my hand a light squeeze before letting go.
The faint pressure almost felt like reassurance, like forgiveness, and the burn in my eyes grew unbearable.
“I’m so sorry,” I whispered, trying and failing to look him in the eye.