4. Chapter Four #2
“Because I’ve been a prisoner for most of my life. I want to get out and see the city. I can do that, right? Because if I can’t, I’m going to complain your ear off for the rest of our lives together and I don’t think you would find that amusing.”
“You’re allowed to leave the house. I don’t want a prisoner for a wife.
With that being said, you have to be careful.
I have enemies here. People who would hurt you.
Always take a guard with you if you leave but otherwise, you can go to the cafes or museums. My work leaves me busy most of the day so I don’t want you to get bored.
I may not believe in love but that doesn’t mean I want to torture you. ”
The tension in my shoulders eases up slightly. So Adrien isn’t all bad.
“And I can call my mom and sisters?”
He frowns as he stops before a closed door on the second floor. “Why wouldn’t you call them? They’re your family.”
“My uncle, Denis, prevented me from seeing them for years. So I just wanted to make sure.”
“You are not a prisoner here, Anastasia.”
“Ana.”
He ignores me. “I want to have fun with you.” He opens the door and it leads into a large master bedroom.
Soft whites and greys with subtle greens and blacks make the entire space feel like something out of a fairytale.
French doors lead out into a balcony that overlooks the huge expansive backyard. This is a place to fall in love.
Too bad that won’t be happening.
“Are you tired?” Adrien asks, shutting the door behind him.
I’m consciously aware that I am completely alone with him for the first time. And we’re in his bedroom. Well, my bedroom now too. I can see the dark desire in his eyes. It’s obvious he would love to have sex.
I could just give in and have fun. Enjoy my time here. Get everything I’ve ever wanted… except for love. But maybe that’s a small price I have to pay. Most people don’t get everything they want in life.
A compromise.
I stride across the room, intent on having fun. Adrien grabs my face and presses our lips together. The kiss is hot and passionate and everything I’ve ever dreamed of in a kiss. He definitely knows what he’s doing.
Adrien doesn’t waste any time lowering me onto the bed and kissing me more deeply. I can feel his entire body on top of mine. The strength in it. A heat settles its way into my core.
I can do this. I can do this.
So why is my heart hammering and not in a good way?
“Adrien,” I murmur when he kisses down to my neck. It all feels good and yet… I can’t get out of my head. This is all too much, too fast, too soon.
“You smell so good,” he says into my ear.
“Adrien,” I say more firmly, pressing my hands into his chest. To his credit, he raises himself off me, though he still hovers over me, having the upper hand. “It’s too fast.”
“I’m not sure how much slower we can go. I haven’t even undressed you yet. We were only kissing.”
“No, I mean… I’m not ready to do this. I still barely know you. I just need time.”
I can see the disappointment on his face before he closes his features off to me. “So, you don’t want to have sex.”
“I’m just not ready.”
He eases off me and stands up, straightening the sleeves of his button down. “Then I will not force you. I like a woman who is willing in my bed. And you are clearly not willing.”
“Could we maybe talk instead?”
“Talk?” He asks it like he’s never even heard of the word before.
“Yeah, you know. The thing people do to get to know each other better. We could talk. It would help me to get more comfortable with you.”
“I thought you wanted an adventure.”
“I do.”
“Having sex would be an adventure. But talking?” He practically shudders. “I have no desire to talk.”
“No desire to talk? You don’t want to get to know me?”
“I’ve never bothered to get to know the other women I’ve fucked before. It was all in good fun.”
“But I’m not like the other women you’ve been with. I’m your wife. I’m living in your home.”
“True. You are that. But I’ve explained this to you, Anastasia.”
“Ana!” It comes out more of a scream than I intend for it to.
He blinks. “You’re clearly upset. I’ll leave you be to control yourself. I have things I need to work on anyway.” He heads for the door.
“Wait,” I say. “You’re just going to leave… like that?”
There’s a coldness radiating off him that stings. “You said you’d try.”
“And I did try but I realized I’m not ready. Can’t you be patient with me? Can’t you talk with me?”
“About what?”
“Anything and everything!” Why does it feel like I’m talking to a brick wall? Adrien is confusing to say the least.
“I just don’t see the point. We’re not going to fall in love, Anastasia.
We married for convenience and power. If you don’t want to have sex, that’s fine.
I will not force you. This is not a punishment.
If you’re this uncomfortable with me, then I’ll give you some space.
But I’m not going to hang around and talk and pretend I want to do that when I don’t.
So, spend some time exploring the house.
I have work I need to catch back up on.”
“But it’s our honeymoon.” I sound so pathetic that it almost makes me cry.
“Couples usually have sex on their honeymoon but you don’t want that. So where does that leave us?”
“This is our chance to get to know each other.”
“You’re still hoping I’ll fall in love with you. Is that it?”
I flinch because… he’s right. If we spent time together, then maybe Adrien would come around to the idea of love.
“It is,” he says. “But it’s not going to happen.” He wrenches the door open and leaves me, all alone, in a brand new city that I know barely anything about, in a new home without my family. I can’t stop myself from curling into a ball and crying all the pain inside of me out.