Not Her, Me
Dread washed over me the moment I walked in the front door, as it did every day. What mood would Cassius be in? What fresh hell of Aemilia’s was waiting for me?
Cassius’s bad moods never ended well for me. As my father, he left me with no option but to accept it, to grin and bear. And my horrible half sister, Aemilia…she could conjure hell right from the depths of her evil heart.
I held my breath as I closed the door behind me, making myself small and silent, hoping to avoid any altercations. A tiny bubble of hope built within my chest as I tiptoed through the empty living room toward my back bedroom, thinking I could get there unnoticed and slip inside.
But that bubble burst, with a sinking feeling in my gut, when I heard Cassius slam his glass down on the grimy dining room table in the next room. Fuck.
“Read anything useful in your books at that worthless job on how not to be a complete waste of space?” Cassius asked with a derisive smirk—this was our daily routine now that I was out of school.
He knew how much I loved my job at the bookshop, despite its poor pay, so he loved to goad me about it.
Maintaining a bookshop paid better than having no job at all, but more than that, it was an escape from the hell I called home.
Books were better company than people, except for my youngest half sister, Nella. She alone was worth enduring hell for.
“Sure didn’t, Cassius,” I said, with as much snark as I could get away with and avoid a backhand to the face.
I knew he’d been drinking and taunting him was tantamount to poking a hibernating bear.
But I was already in a bad mood, so maybe I was looking for a fight.
Or at least looking to siphon off some of my anger, which, nowadays, was a constant companion.
His chair scraped the floor, then his footsteps grew closer. “You dare speak to me in that tone? After everything I do for your ungrateful ass? And you dare to call me anything but Father, you little burden of a—”
“Okay, yeah, sorry, Dad.” I was flirting with danger using that tone, but I didn’t care.
I was nearing my twentieth birthday, and I could leave this godsforsaken place behind soon.
Not that I had the funds to do so yet. And then there was Nella…
How could I leave her here with our brute of a father?
“But I did read a riveting guide on beheading, torture, and how to get away with murdering your oppressors.”
I bolted toward my door before his foggy brain could piece together what I’d said.
His angry snarl reached me just as I rounded the corner toward the bedroom I shared with Nella and found it blocked by Aemilia.
For all the love I had for Nella, I despised Aemilia just as much.
My two half sisters shared the same fae mother but could not have been more different from each other.
Aemilia and Cassius had hardened souls, a penchant for violence, and only loved and appreciated each other. And now I was caught between them.
“Daddy, I’ve got Naci cornered! You’re in trouble now, freak,” Aemilia said with a satisfied grin that revealed her sharpened fae canines.
She tossed her long dark brown hair over her shoulders, intentionally showing off her pointed ears—a reminder that she was the only one in this house with magic, even if she was only half-fae.
Nella hadn’t inherited any powers or physical fae traits from their mother—Cassius’s mortal blood won out for her.
“Well done, Aemilia. Bring Agnella out here too. I know those two have been scheming. I hear the whispers at night.”
His use of Nella’s full name took me a second to register, as I never used either of our full names.
“No…” Panic set in. “Dad. Father, please leave Nella out of this! It’s my fault, she did nothing, I—”
“You know Daddy can’t stand when you defend that useless rag,” Aemilia said.
I knew I’d messed up with Cassius, but Aemilia didn’t scare me. She was evil but brainless, and I had a few inches plus nearly three years on her. And skinny as I was, I didn’t need to hide behind magic as she did. I could fight, and I was a master strategist.
“Wanna know a secret, Aemilia?” I asked.
Her smile dropped into a sneer.
“The only ‘useless rag’ in this piss-poor excuse of a house is the space between your ears that you call a brain.” Insulting her felt so good in the moment.
Just as she opened her mouth to retort, Nella flung the door to our room open with wide eyes, having heard me taunt Aemilia.
That was when Cassius came stumbling down the hall, belt in hand. I knew how this was going to go, but I’d be damned if I let him hurt Nella. I would bleed every last drop of my blood to ensure that not a drop of hers was ever spilled. Not by this monster who called himself our father.
Aemilia slipped behind Cassius with a wild, wicked grin. She relished my abuse. I relished her death in my dreams.
“Naci, you shouldn’t have! He’ll hurt you for that!” Nella said, grabbing my arm and attempting to pull me into our tiny bedroom, away from my impending suffering.
“It’s okay, little lamb,” I said with a soft smile. “If it keeps you safe, I’d throw every insult I can think of at them both.”
I tucked a lock of her thick golden-blonde hair behind her ear just as Cassius made it to where I was standing.
I saw the fear well up in her wide blue eyes over what we both knew was about to happen.
That look tore me apart, but it was better than her being hurt.
For only fifteen, she’d already seen too much bad in the world.
Cassius yanked me away from Nella so hard I thought my shoulder had dislocated, then he wheeled me about to face him.
He stood more than a head taller than me, with broad shoulders and crazed brown eyes.
His build spoke of strength wasted away by years of heavy drinking, with the gut to prove it.
He was massive compared to almost anyone, but especially me.
Alright, asshole, here we go…
“You clearly need a reminder who runs this house!” Spittle flew from his lips as he circled me like prey.
I didn’t move—I knew it would be worse if I did.
“Who puts the roof over your undeserving head and the food in your unworthy belly? You’re a disgrace to the Corren name. Even your mother was so ashamed of you that she ran out!”
There it was. The worst of the abuse. Worse than anything he could do with a belt or hand.
My mother. No matter what he said, I imagined love in these dire moments when I thought of her.
I’d been so young, I had no way of knowing if she loved me before she left, so it may have been wishful thinking.
But it cut me so deep to hear him bring her into my torture.
I remained silent, despite my shaking rage, and held his stare in defiance. I knew I’d pushed him too far tonight, but I found it impossible to hold my tongue when he brought my mom up.
He was mean at the best of times, and Aemilia fed off his rage and hate toward me.
I never could figure out why, though. Sure, I had an attitude and open disdain for them both, but their hate was so extreme that I couldn’t make sense of it.
I didn’t know what I’d done, other than exist, that pissed Cassius off, and Aemilia just enjoyed being evil.
But I had learned to stop questioning it and deal with it for Nella’s sake.
She was so sweet and innocent, her heart too caring and open—the yin to my dark, lonely, and burning yang.
She didn’t deserve this life, even if I did, which was why I fought tooth and nail to keep our father’s wrath aimed solely at me.
I was caught off guard as the first whip of his belt hit me on the back of my calf, sending me to my knees. My thoughts stayed on my mother and Nella as the pain sent shockwaves through my body. I tried my best not to cry out, as that would only incite him more.
As the second lash hit my back, I felt my thin shirt tear and heat build in the welted skin. Tears stung the back of my eyes, but I knew there was more in store for me than just this.
“Aemilia, sweetheart, give me your lightning so we can make sure the message really sets in.”
This is where things got bad.
I squeezed my eyes shut and saw the glow of lightning from beneath my eyelids, heard Aemilia’s amused chuckle coupled with the crackle of her powers.
Aemilia was so fucking special and fantastic because she had lightning powers.
It was why Cassius loved her so much and hated the rest of his mortal children—why he gave her everything while Nella and I borderline starved.
Aemilia and her lightning were proof that he once mattered to someone powerful—a fae.
I focused on a fabricated memory with my mother from when I was a small child as I braced for what would be a damning blow with that lightning-infused belt.
I didn’t actually know her face, but in my mind, I saw the warmth in her tanned features and her wide smile, the love in her eyes, and I let it envelop me, if only in my mind.
It was more of a hopeful glimpse of the past than a memory.
But I saw her, and I imagined I could feel her too—her soft hand on my cheek and the comforting heat she radiated.
Sometimes, if I imagined hard, I could smell honeysuckle.
This time, the belt wrapped around my thigh at his strike, and it sent electricity through my whole body, the sound crackling in my ears.
I let out an involuntary scream. I smelled singed hair as the static coursed through my twitching body and tasted copper, as if I had a coin in my mouth. Her lightning was so unlike the magic the fae harnessed for our electricity. It was far more wicked and unnatural.
“Pain is the only thing that can get through that thick skull of yours. I’ll strike Nella next if you don’t learn respect. So I’ll ask one time, are you gonna be more grateful and start showing me some respect?”