CHAPTER 35 #2
“Can we talk about Lainey later?” Dana’s shoulder rose and fell. “It’s my birthday. I just want to be here with you. I haven’t kissed you in days.”
“Yes. We can even do that for hours to make up for it, if you want.”
“I wasn’t thinking we’d kiss for hours.”
Dana pulled back and smirked at her.
“Hey, I have a gift for you.”
“You do? Shit. I didn’t get you a Christmas gift. I was going to buy you something in LA and–”
“It’s okay,” Samara told her, cupping Dana’s cheek. “I don’t need anything. I’m just happy that I’m here; that we’re together.”
“But you got me something?”
“Not exactly,” Samara replied. “I didn’t actually buy you anything for Christmas.”
“Okay…”
Dana looked at her in confusion.
“Dana, I–” Samara cleared her throat. “I love you.”
Dana tilted her head and asked, “That’s my Christmas gift?”
Samara didn’t know what to say. She’d listened to Kyla, which had clearly been a bad idea, and now, she didn’t know how to get out of this. She had just told someone she loved them for the first time, after years of thinking she’d never say it, and she’d done it wrong somehow.
“That’s the best Christmas gift I’ve ever gotten,” Dana added, and suddenly, Samara was on her back, not knowing how she’d gotten there. “Really? You love me?”
“It’s not crazy?” Samara asked and smiled up as Dana moved on top of her.
“Probably,” Dana replied. “But I’m good with crazy.” She pressed their foreheads together this time. “I love you, too, you know?”
“You do?”
Dana nodded and rubbed her nose against Samara’s.
“I got you a birthday present, too,” Samara said.
“Is it in your suitcase? I’m exhausted, but I will happily do anything you want tonight.”
Samara laughed and said, “Not in my suitcase. I didn’t buy anything.”
“Okay… I’m confused again,” Dana stated, so Samara pulled her phone out of her pocket and unlocked it.
“I talked to everyone I needed to talk to, which sounds silly, but it’s part of being in this business.” She found the app and turned the phone around. “Remember this picture?”
“Our Hollywood sign selfie? Yeah. Why?”
“Read what it says under it.”
Dana took the phone from her and sat up, straddling her, to read the post Samara had drafted but hadn’t yet sent out to social media.
She looked incredibly focused, and Samara worried that she’d gotten too ahead of herself with this one.
Confessing their love to one another had already been a massive step, but it might be the only one they should take for a while, considering how new they still were.
“Samara…”
“Is it okay?”
“This is you coming out, babe.”
Dana looked down at her.
“With you on my arm. If you’re okay with that. If not, it’s okay. I can change the picture.”
“But… Are you sure? You don’t have to do this for me. I don’t need you to do anything you’re not ready for. You had a plan.”
“Yes, I did, and you weren’t a part of it at all.
Suddenly, you’re there, and it’s like, yeah, I know what I want, and it’s you.
The moment I press send on that, though, everyone will want to know who you are.
Your life will get complicated. I didn’t want to do this unless you were okay with it.
If you’re not, we can wait until you’re in LA, or until we’ve been together longer.
I won’t be upset. It just means I’d need to buy you a real birthday present,” Samara said with a smile.
“Are you sure?” Dana checked. “I mean it. You have to be sure that this is what you want for you. I love you. I know that how I know that I’ve always wanted to be an actor, and I don’t want this to end, but it is still new. Coming out without me in the picture might be a better first step.”
“You were my first step,” Samara said, smiling up at her.
“No matter what happens between you and me, you’ll always be part of my coming out journey.
I’ve thought a lot about this while you were here and I was there alone, missing you and wishing I could just be myself with the world.
I’ve never been in love before, but I met you, and it was clear to me: I love you.
I’m tired of being scared, Dana. I’m ready. ”
Dana handed her the phone and said, “Then, post it.”
“You’re one-hundred-percent sure? You’re tagged here. People will–”
“My profiles are all set to private. I’m good. Post it.”
Samara bit her lower lip and said, “Okay.”
“Babe?” Dana said.
“You changed your mind?”
“What? No.” Dana laughed. “I was just going to say that I’m really, really proud of you.”
“I’m proud of you, too,” Samara replied.
Then, before she could talk herself out of it, she pressed her screen and came out to the world.
She swallowed, and her heart was beating fast, but it was fast in a good way, not in that way that she usually felt when she was overwhelmed and scared.
This was fast in the way that told her she was excited and happy and couldn’t wait for the next step in her life, whatever that would be.
“It was sweet what you said in the post,” Dana said.
“That I met an amazing woman and fell so hard, I let her take a ridiculous selfie of me in front of the Hollywood sign?”
“Yes,” Dana said with a laugh. “But I seem to remember you making me take that picture.”
“We remember that differently,” she replied, dropping her phone and wrapping her arms around Dana’s neck as Dana moved back down.
“I feel like that’s going to happen a lot in this relationship,” Dana teased.
“Will you shut up and let me give you a birthday kiss already?”
“I want more than a birthday kiss,” Dana told her.
“You want one at midnight, too?”
Dana pressed her forehead to Samara’s again and said, “Then, in the morning as well, and I’m thinking every day for maybe, like… ever.”
Samara laughed and replied, “That sounds pretty good to me.”
Samara’s phone then dinged, pinged, gonged, bonged, and emitted just about every notification sound all at the same time.
“I think people have some thoughts about your recent announcement,” Dana said as she reached for the phone.
“Yeah… Don’t care. Come here,” Samara said, pulling Dana in for a searing kiss she’d needed for over a week now.