Chapter 26 #2
“Sweden.” A smile spread across her lips as she gazed off into the distance, lost in thought.
“It was beautiful there. On the weekends, a small group of us would take the train or a boat and go to other towns and countries. On one of our trips, I met someone. He was a couple of years older than me, he was gorgeous, and we had an instant connection.”
“Which country?”
“Norway.” She blinked, the far off gaze disappearing as she refocused on me. “We exchanged numbers. He convinced me to go on a few dates with him. Alone. We eventually slept together. That man is your biological father.”
I didn’t know what to say to any of this. “Didn’t you use protection?” I asked lamely.
“We did. But we’d, uh, had intercourse in a pool. Condoms aren’t as effective in chlorinated water.” She spoke matter of factly.
I scrunched my nose, having a hard time imagining my mom with a fling in college. She always seemed so…responsible, grounded, and not adventurous at all.
“Anyway, that was four weeks before my semester ended. I returned home and discovered I was pregnant and due in February. I signed up for as many summer classes as I could and managed to graduate a semester early, in December, before you were born.”
I hadn’t known my mom graduated early like that.
“During that time, there had been a few abnormalities in my ultrasound. I was referred to a genetic specialist. That’s when I met Noah. He was doing his residency at that time.”
She twisted her coffee cup, her focus on it instead of me.
“Did your parents know you were pregnant?” I asked.
“No. I was too afraid to tell them. I figured if I graduated first, then told them about you, it wouldn’t be so bad.” She rubbed her temple. “Noah personally performed a sonogram and ran some tests.”
“What did he discover?” I asked, leaning forward. “What’s the insulin hiding?”
“Noah spoke to me privately. He told me his suspicions. I didn’t understand any of it. I hadn’t known that the man I slept with wasn’t…human. He looked human, acted human.” She shook her head, tears filling her eyes.
My heart pounded, trying to come up with logical possibilities for what I could be. What my biological dad was. What Rowan and his friends were. I couldn’t think of anything that made sense.
“I knew if anyone found out, you’d be taken from me.
I didn’t know what information the clinic already had on you, so I didn’t go back.
I changed my name. Noah arranged for me to have a home birth.
He delivered you and saw to your care. Noah and I got close.
He asked me to marry him. He came from money, and I knew he could keep us safe. ”
I wondered why Noah had been so willing to help my mother. Maybe he was in love with her, or maybe he wanted to be able to study me and my condition. “You put Noah’s name on the birth certificate?” I knew she did but wanted to nudge her to continue.
“I did. I also lied about your birthdate.”
Shock rolled through me. “My birthday isn’t April twenty-first?”
She shook her head. “You were born in February.” She looked pointedly at the ring on my finger.
The amethyst. “It was the safest thing to do. That way, if anyone came looking for you, they’d be looking for a baby born in February, not April.
Plus, if your biological father ever tried to find me, he wouldn’t know you’re his.
He’d assume I got pregnant with you after I returned from Europe. ”
The server approached with our food. After setting the plates down, he left.
The french toast didn’t look appetizing at the moment. “Did my biological father give you any reason to think he’d try to track you down?” I didn’t see how it would matter if he did.
Mom gazed outside for a minute, lost in thought.
Needing something to do, I smeared the butter over my french toast. Then I drizzled some syrup over it.
“This next part is difficult for me to talk about,” she said.
“Especially with you.” She picked up her fork and knife, then set them both down, pushing her plate away.
“I was leaving in four weeks. He knew that. After we had intercourse in the pool, he asked me to stay in Europe with him. It wasn’t a proposal; it was just so we could keep spending time together and see where a relationship might lead.
” She looked me in the eyes, as if begging me to understand and sympathize with her.
I could do neither at the moment. I needed to know more.
“I really enjoyed our time together, but it was just a fling for me. A time to let loose. I had to return home. My parents would never have let me stay in Europe, let alone paid for it. I had to go back and finish school. I had one more year. I didn’t see the point in us keeping in touch.”
She took a sip from her coffee, this time her hands visibly shook.
“I was staying in a dorm similar to what you’re in but much smaller.
I called and left a message with him, ending things.
That night, I was out at a bar with a group of friends.
One of the guys, Andrew, had his arm around me.
We flirted, but that was all. I returned to the dorm and went to sleep.
The next day, Pierce showed up at my dorm.
He confronted Andrew. He was angry, and I thought he’d hurt Andrew. His behavior really scared me.”
“Pierce? Is that my biological father’s name?”
“Forget I told you that. I don’t want you to know anything about him.”
“Why?” I had a right to know since he was part of me.
“He’s dangerous.”
“Because he was jealous and yelled at someone?”
“No,” she hissed. “Because he killed Andrew.”
“In front of you?” I asked, horrified.
“No. He left. We went to class like normal. That night, we realized Andrew was missing. The police were called. Two days later, his body was found in a nearby canal. He’d been murdered.”
“Was my father arrested?” Was he in jail?
“No. There wasn’t enough evidence. I was so freaked out that I spoke with my advisor and returned home early. I had this feeling that he was after me. That I was next. I was jumpy and scared at school. I kept expecting to find him hiding somewhere ready to kill me for flirting with another man.”
“When did you realize you were pregnant?”
“A couple of weeks after I’d returned to the States.”
“You never knew my dad wasn’t fully human? You never saw anything?” I’d never seen anything with Rowan to suspect he wasn’t human. And as far as I was concerned, I didn’t display any traits that hinted I might not be human.
“Looking back, there had been a few things I brushed off at the time. His eyes changed; his senses were amplified. He could see and smell things no one else could.” Her hands were still shaking.
“What did Noah see on the sonogram?” I asked.
Mom’s eyes filled with tears. “Parts of your body didn’t look right. One minute you’d be fine, look human, then the next you wouldn’t.”
I nodded. “So you changed your name, had me, lied about the father and birth date, got married, and changed our last names to Noah’s. How does the insulin that’s not insulin fit into this?”
“Noah and I were able to pinpoint a gene that was causing you to mutate. After a lot of research, we were able to come up with a serum that suppressed that gene. We gave it to you. It did the trick. We had to adjust it as you grew, but it has been highly effective.”
“Mutate? What would I look like? Do you have pictures?” My mom was known for her research. She had to have pictures.
“I don’t have any pictures,” she replied. “Noah and I wanted you to be able to experience a normal childhood without any noticeable deformities. The serum does the trick.”
“If I stop taking it, will the gene no longer be suppressed?” I wondered what would happen to me.
“First, you’d go into withdrawal. Then the gene would do what it does. Your life would no longer be normal.” Tears spilled down my mom’s face. She wiped them away. “I’m sorry I’ve kept this from you. I only wanted to keep you safe and give you a normal life.”
So many things made sense now. Her overprotectiveness. Her paranoia. I had so many questions, like whether I could have children or if they’d carry the gene. And what exactly was I? My mom had to know given that she’d located the gene and managed to suppress it.
I was about to ask her when she said, “My entire life has been dedicated to you. The genetics lab, everything, is for you. I love you.”
“Does Dad, Noah, know you’re telling me all this?”
“He does.”
“And Rowan…”
“I’m sure you’re attracted to him because you’re somewhat like him. He’s like your dad. You have to understand how much that scares me. I just want to keep you safe and away from that dangerous world.”
“I understand. But Mom, what am I?” Reaching out, I grabbed her hand, holding it tightly, begging for her to tell me.
“If anyone finds out, a doctor, teacher, police officer, they’ll take you away and do experiments on you. They might even kill you.”
“How do you know I’m different? What did you see on the sonogram?”
“It wasn’t just the sonogram,” she said. “When you were a baby, I saw things that weren’t normal.” She shivered.
“What did I do?” I had to know.
“You…shifted. Into something else. Something not human.”
I was going to be ill. I needed more answers. The only person who could explain everything to me was Rowan.
For the second time today, I stood outside my dorm building.
This time, I was waiting for Rowan to pick me up.
He’d told me to wear something comfortable and warm.
In order for him to tell me what he needed to, we’d be going somewhere private.
Alone. I shivered, wondering if I should be scared.
Before talking to my mom, I would have said Rowan would never hurt me.
Now, I had no idea. He’d hurt me this week with his distance.
And now he was taking me somewhere. I texted Sarah to let her know.
If I wasn’t back by tomorrow, she would call my mom so she could track me.
Standing there, I realized I wasn’t just anxious, I was terrified. Frightened of what I was, of what Rowan was, and what I’d learn tonight. It felt as if I stood at the top of a steep cliff while the wind blew, making me teeter. I didn’t know if I’d stumble to safety or plummet to my death.
Rowan’s truck pulled into the parking lot and stopped next to me. Taking a deep breath, I opened the door and climbed inside.
His scent enveloped me, immediately calming my racing heart. Even though I was scared, mad, and overwhelmed, just smelling him put me at ease. An intense desire to touch and kiss him inundated me. I forced myself to put my seat belt on and not look his way.
“Thank you for giving me this chance to explain things,” he said, his voice instantly soothing me.
“I want to know everything.” Not bits and pieces. He had to fill in the holes my mom left.
“That’s what I plan on doing. Are you sure you’re ready for this, Laney?”
Against my better judgment, I looked over at him. I’d missed him more than I realized. His gorgeous eyes pulled me in, revealing love. Instinct had me reaching over and taking his hand. “I’m ready.”
He drove us off campus and along the highway leading out of town.
I sat there, clutching his hand, afraid of what truths would be revealed tonight.
We drove about an hour before he pulled off the road and stopped the truck.
“Can we park here?” I asked, not seeing anything around and fear creeping in. Mom had said my dad was dangerous and that Rowan was like him.
“You know you don’t have anything to worry about with me,” Rowan said, as if reading my mind.
He got out of the truck and grabbed a huge backpack that had all sorts of compartments. It was taller than his head. Considering how tall he was, that was saying something.
“What are we doing?” I asked as I reluctantly climbed out.
“I’m taking you camping.”
Confusion filled me. “I thought we were going to talk?” And I’d finally have all the answers I needed.
“We are. While camping.”
“You haven’t spoken to me all week.” And now he wanted to go camping. I couldn’t figure him out.
“I’ll explain everything. I promise.”
“Rowan,” I said, needing to understand. I wasn’t going to traipse off with him in the woods late at night. This was giving major creeper vibes right now. Or murder vibes.
“Laney,” he replied. “I promised myself I’d take you camping. This is me doing that. While we’re camping, I will tell you everything.”
It was late October, and the weather was getting cold. I only had my sweatpants and crew neck.
Then I realized what he’d implied. He’d promised himself he’d take me camping. Which meant he was definitely going to break up with me. “Is this our last time together?” My voice hitched while I spoke. I hadn’t meant to show emotion or let him know how upset I was.
Without answering, he started walking. After a few feet, he turned back. His eyes were red. “Yes.” He held out his hand. It was up to me if I took it. “If you don’t want to go camping with me, I’ll explain everything, then take you back to your dorm.”
I made my choice.