13. Abigail
Icame out from the session with Jason, and I was all out of sorts. Dana cocked her brow up at me, but I ignored it and her. I wasn’t going to feel weird about what I’d just done in there. I refused. I felt amazing, Jason was amazing, and I wasn’t going to feel bad about it. Granted, I had no idea what I was doing when it came to Jason, but I didn’t think it mattered all that much. He was high, then low, and I understood his explanation far more than I would have liked to. I knew at once what he was trying to say.
I’d agreed to go to his place, offered it even, because I knew how badly I wanted him. When he had apologized, then touched me the way he had, I lost it right there. It had been hard and fast, throwing me out of sorts. I really liked Jason, even when it was so confusing.
“Do you want to go out with me tonight? I was thinking dancing and a few drinks?”
I agreed that it sounded fun, but I knew that I had a lot more fun waiting for me at Jason’s. I wasn’t going to be able to get out of it and I didn’t want to. We were finally going to finish what we’d started. That was all I wanted. “No, I think I am going with someone tonight.”
Dana asked if it was going to be Jason, and I knew that there wasn’t much I could do about it. She knew, so I admitted it.
“Yeah.”
“I thought you said that he had a temper that you couldn’t deal with.”
I shrugged. “I was wrong. He has a temper, but I understand why he does, so it really isn’t that hard to understand him. I get him now, so it is a lot better.”
“You really should fix your hair before the next patient comes in.”
I felt my hair and I could feel it was out of sorts. When I got to the mirror, I gasped, and she just shook her head. “I can see why you want to make the best of it. He is hot and apparently gets you going. Does he have a friend?”
I shrugged because I didn’t know. I did tell her that I would keep a lookout and I meant it. I wanted there to be a reason that the two of us could go on. I wanted there to be something special about us that made us different. We were exactly what the other one needed and since I never thought I would be “it” for anyone, I liked the feeling a lot, even if it didn’t all the way make sense. Did it really have to?
Later that eveningwhen I got home from work, I took a shower and got ready carefully. Third time was the charm, right? I said the words out loud, and it sounded strange, even to my own ears. I wondered how it was all going to turn out. Was it going to end the same way that it had three times before? I hoped not. I wanted this time to be different.
I got to his place about the same time again and when I knocked, he answered in just a moment. That relaxed me a little bit, but it didn’t last very long. I wasn’t relaxed after realizing that he already had his shirt off and there was only a pair of shorts on down below. His body stopped me in my tracks. It was bad enough to feel all of the hard rigids pushed up against me. It was another thing altogether to see him without his shirt on. My mouth was dry, and he asked me if I was coming in.
I agreed that I was and before I could stop myself, I told him that he looked good. He chuckled. “You like? I was just about to switch the air on. I was cooking and it got hot in here.”
“Uh huh.” I couldn’t say much more, and he just chuckled so I had to guess that he was used to women falling all over him. Just because he was blind now, didn’t mean that he hadn’t done enough of that in the past.
He offered me a drink and I took it, drinking more than I should have in one gulp, because I really just didn’t know what to say or do. I was lost in the moment, and I didn’t know where I was supposed to go from here. I was still thinking about him touching me before in the room and how good it had felt. I had come all over, and I wanted to do that again.
“Are you hungry?” Jason wanted to know.
“Not really.”
There was silence and then he grinned. “What would you like to do?”
“We could watch a movie?”
He scoffed, “Is that what you want?”
I disagreed. “No, I want to finish what we started the other day. That’s what I really want to do.”
That was all the answer that he needed. He moved close and took my face in his hands. He kissed me so delicately and then pushed the limit as his tongue pursued more. He was kissing me in a way that was so full body. I didn’t know what to think of how he made me feel. I tried my best to figure out what happened next, but I didn’t need to wait long. Jason was moving me back toward the bedroom or at least that was where I thought we were going. He had the sweetest look on his face when he looked at me. He couldn’t see me looking, but I think I was falling in love with him in that moment. I was all over him in seconds.
The bedroom was there, and I could feel the bed against my back. It was soft and there was something about the way it sprang back when I sat down. Jason was quickly on top of me, moving me further up on the bed so I wasn’t hanging over with my legs.
“Now I know right where you are. In the bedroom is the only place that I am used to not seeing.”
I wasn’t really listening because as he was talking, his fingers and then his mouth were doing everything they could to distract me. I couldn’t help how turned on I was and when he came off and started to take off the last thing standing between us, I gasped with the sight. He didn’t seem to wonder what I was worried about. Jason was no longer wobbly, and he moved me around in his arms like he was the one in charge. He really was too. I was powerless against the way he made me feel with his fingers. I opened my legs to his hand that started to rub on me again. He made comments of how hot and wet I was, but that was nothing that I hadn’t heard before. I was wet, dripping wet, and it was all for him. I was dying for him to push deep, and I just needed a moment.
“Please!” I didn’t know what exactly I was begging for, but whatever it was, Jason was going to give me everything that I needed. I was shaking underneath him, and his knees were wedging my thighs open. I had a lot on my mind, but at the end of the day, I just wanted him inside of me. I worried that something would happen and change it all again. I didn’t know if I was going to be able to figure that out. I didn’t know if I wanted to.
“I am so glad that I met you, Abigail.” Jason started.
“Great, now you want to converse,” I started to fuss, but then he surged deep, and I screamed out instead. I knew it was coming, saw how thick and nice he was, but being split wide open with his hard length was more than I could have prepared myself for. He felt amazing and before I could stop it, Jason was balls deep and he was kissing my lips, shushing my moans and whimpers. I’d gotten everything that I wanted, even though it felt like more than I could handle. Jason petted me like I was a nervous animal, making sounds to calm me down.
“Fuck you feel good.” He kept repeating that as he started to move inside of me. I looked up and his eyes were closed. He was getting into it, and I was turned on more than I had been in a very long time. Every stroke in, made us both moan in pleasure and await the next stroke to do it all over again.
I closed my eyes for a moment and relaxed my grip. I let myself feel the soft mattress underneath me, the heavy man pressing me deeper into it. Every time Jason leaned in and set me straight with his hard length, I dipped a little deeper into the mattress. Everything around me felt like it was so far away. I wanted to try many things, to make him move deeper, but I was afraid that I would throw him off again. I was feeling so good, but still trying to hold myself together as well. It was a strange way of living and honestly, I wasn’t sure what I was supposed to do with the feelings that I had racking up inside of me.
I came multiple times, but he didn’t slow down, and I didn’t want him to. Instead, I clung to him and let him slide in and out of me at whatever pace that he wanted. It was more than I could handle and before I could say more or do anything else, Jason was pulling out and flipping me onto my back. I was amazed by how quickly he could change my position and how good he was at it. Even without his sight, Jason was far more into it than I was. He seemed to know every inch of my body and again, it was a wonder because I knew that he couldn’t see more than shadows.
Every time I doubted how he could do something, he just did it even better and I forgot all of it. I forgot who he was, who I was. I couldn’t think straight at all and each push in was moving me in another direction. He had one thigh cocked up and it hit differently. I came hard and I swear that it was all because he knew everything about me. I didn’t know what he was going off of, but I was so worked up. I really couldn’t help it. Why was he making me feel like everything was going to end now?
I couldn’t hold on any longer and I collapsed against the mattress that welcomed me. Jason just changed how he pushed in, and I was left trying to pull myself together. He was no longer listening to reason; he was on his own journey. I felt his desire sprouting wings before I felt it inside of me. He really did feel amazing, and I didn’t know if I was ever going to be able to handle him. I just barely managed to and when he started to shoot himself deep, I felt so full that I could barely keep it all in. He’d stretched me to capacity and before I could do anything more, I was begging him to give it all to me. He made me feel like I was a cat in heat, with that much sense. I didn’t like feeling like I had no control over myself. With him though, I knew I never would.
He laid down next to me, and after a few moments, I eyed him from where he had left me. I was beyond dignity and before I could do much else, I was crawling over to him and sliding on top of his body. He jerked a little. Jason wasn’t prepared for me to get on him. “What are you doing?”
“Riding,” I said simply. He was still partially hard, and he slid right in. I gasped by the quick entrance. I knew that he would start growing, and I was able to finally have something my own way. I put his hands on my hips and clenched him until I heard him moan. “Trust me, Jason, you are going to like it. Lay back and relax.”
He scoffed and groaned as I rotated my hips. He felt so good and so deep, I was going to lose it sooner than I thought, but it didn’t matter. I was in charge now, and I was going to take all that I could. Jason was a great lover, and he was well equipped for the job. I had never felt anything that was better. I wanted more and my movements got faster as we both panted and whimpered with the meeting of our bodies. Jason had tried to slow me down, but there was nothing he could do.
My head went back and I rode him with abandon. I came repeatedly, but every time I thought that I was done, Jason would take over and remind me that I wasn’t. I didn’t know if I could ever get over all of the feelings that Jason stirred up inside of me.
I watched his face as he finally came again, and it was one of the hottest moments of my life. It was like a secret that only I could see. He couldn’t even see the expression that my body gave to him. It was one of the sexiest moments of my life, to know that his desire was all mine. In that moment, I felt like I knew him better than he knew himself.
When I got off of him, he slipped out of me and we both reacted to the change. I was no longer feeling stuffed, but I missed the feeling that he created inside of me. I wanted it back. I already felt empty without him.