25. Chapter 25
Fitz
W hatever secrets she was guarding, they were perched at the tip of her tongue. With the right nudge, I felt as though she would spill it all, but I couldn’t find the combination that would trigger the release.
“I told you,” Sadira swallowed hard and squared her jaw, “I found that letter and she said she was—”
“It wasn’t real,” I corrected her.
“It was her handwriting, Your Highness.” She stammered for a moment then added, “I know it was.”
“Yes, her writing, but coerced. We had…” I hesitated for some reason, as if she weren’t worthy of the information, “a certain way of signing letters. Never would she have penned the word sincerely. Especially not to announce that she was leaving me.”
If I hadn’t been watching, I never would have seen it. A flinch. Hardly even a tightening of muscle, and yet it clearly corresponded to the insight that Michaela had hidden a message within her letter. But what did that mean? Was Sadie involved? Why? Other than to force me to marry her? Would she truly be that desperate? There was one way to find out…
I dropped my hands from her shoulders. In order to learn the truth, I couldn’t exert any pressure. She had to know this wasn’t a royal command. The door opened behind me, but I paid it no mind. I needed answers and I sensed the poor raffle winner from the Eshein Province was the gatekeeper.
“Leonidas,” my mother spoke my name, almost enough to deter me, but I pretended it hadn’t registered.
“Lady Sadira,” I extended my hand to her, offering myself, so to speak, “I would have you know, I made my decision and it isn’t you. I fully planned to announce my marriage to Michaela Caldwell at the ball. If the court accepted her, we would marry, and if they didn’t, I would abdicate and walk away forever.”
The sharp intake of breath belonged to Mother, no doubt, because Sadie held steady, unflinching and strangely interested, not horrified as one might expect from the one being told she was the projected loser.
“But since she is missing and my hour has come, I have had to reevaluate that choice.” I couldn’t be distracted by anything else. I watched the maiden carefully. “Instead, I choose to extend that invitation to you.” As a symbol of that, I reached for her hand, which she readily gave. “I’m asking if you’ll marry me, Lady Sadira. Here, tonight. Right now.”
Another gasp sounded behind me, Mother again, but this time all too happy she was getting her way. Sadira, however, looked five shades of green and gray at the thought. I didn’t plan to make it any easier, either.
Before she could answer, I continued. “You should know, I will never love you, not really. It will be her face I see, her arms I feel around me. Our marriage will be one of convenience and necessity. We will never be truly wed, not in heart or mind. I will never share your bed or have children with you because anything of the sort would be a lie and a betrayal to the one whom I am truly devoted.” I waited, needing to understand if she understood what I was saying. “All that considered, are you still willing to marry me?”
In a normal world, with any other competitor, Chantal included, I suspected they would try to convince me otherwise. Tell me that my mind would change after enough time and eventually we would fall in love. I thought Sadira might try to explain her merits or virtues, how she differed from Michaela, and why it was an asset, not a hindrance. In essence, I expected any normal person would have fought for their right to love.
But that didn’t happen.
In fact, Sadie didn’t even look in my eyes at first. Instead, her gaze moved beyond me, focused on my mother who waited behind me. Why would she be seeking permission from the queen?
“I find your terms quite agreeable.” She placed her hand in mine. “I will marry you, tonight, right now.”
My stomach twisted with concern. I had my answer. Yes, Sadie would stop at nothing to win. But why? What motivated her to be willing to sign up for a lifetime of unrequited love?
Just about the time I had forgotten her, Mother interrupted my thoughts.
“Surely she can’t be married in this.” Mother protested, waving her hands at the purple gown Sadie had selected. “She looks like an under taker, not a bride.”
“And what do you suggest, Mother? We’re two hours from midnight. I thought you were on a timetable.”
“We are, but that doesn’t mean we have to throw away every tradition. In fact, I have a few options at my disposal,” she spoke as if this hadn’t been her plan all along, “and they happen to be in Sadira’s size. I will send them to her chambers along with a host of lady’s maids to prepare.”
“If it’s not too much to ask, Your Majesty,” Sadira’s mousy voice barely carried, “the dress Michaela planned to wear tonight is positively breathtaking…”
“You would wear her dress?” I nearly showed my hand, all too defensive in the face of her outright disrespect toward the woman I loved. “Why?”
“You said you would see her every time you gazed at my face. I thought it might make it easier for you.” She pressed her lips together, hesitating for a moment. Did she sense my irritation? “Perhaps it would bring us both a modicum of comfort, my friend, your love. A tribute?”
“I’ll send someone for it right away. Along with the others.” Mother clapped her hands loudly and spouted orders. “Reginald, get them to work. You know where the dresses are located. Fetch them to Lady Sadira’s room with great haste. I think if we call the…” Reginald followed on her heel, taking her orders as she strode quickly down the empty hallway toward the grand staircase.
I turned my focus on Sadie once more. “You’re sure about this?”
Again, I expected some declaration about a possible future together and, once more, she said words I never would have expected.
“I believe, Your Highness, this is the best for all of us.”
While there was no way I could ever believe that, as far as I could tell, she did.
Michaela
“How do you get yourself in these situations?” I asked myself out loud as I inched along the ledge outside the palace window. “This is the gate all over again. Leap first, ask questions later.” I was really losing it, having an entire conversation with myself. “But look where it’s gotten you? Fifty feet above the ground, one strong sneeze away from being a pavement pancake. Real nice there, Princess Coco .”
I slid another step to the left, staring over the courtyard below me. It looked like I was coming up on the arches that I’d seen in the gardens when I arrived. I’d been trying to get a good look at the gardens since day one, but an arial view like this one wasn’t my plan.
Still, the outdoor lights caught the snow and sent twinkling beams in every direction and I couldn’t deny the beauty… despite my pounding heartbeat. My feet grated on the ledge, one tiny step at a time. I refused to focus on the fall though.
I counted rose bushes. I tried to gauge the distance from the palace to the outer walls that surrounded the property. I even spotted the dang gate that I’d gotten wedged in weeks ago when Reginald had found me. It felt like a lifetime since then, but also maybe only a day. So much had happened, the greatest of which was falling in love with my best friend.
Oh, Fitz. Where are you? Why haven’t you come for me?
What if he believed the letter? What if he married Sadie instead? In the millisecond it took to think of it, my focus split.
My foot slipped.
Gravity captured my frame and yanked me downward.
My heart leapt up like it was making a break to climb to higher ground. Pain ripped through my palms as I clawed at the palace wall behind me, trying to find purchase. I whimpered as my vision bounced around the fall below me. No amount of ordering myself to stay calm would help. My heel ground against the ledge and finally created traction that drove me back against the wall. I closed my eyes and panted, tears rolling over my cheeks.
I had to get off this ledge. It was bound and determined to kill me and I couldn’t let it. I drew in a soft breath, forced it in a tiny stream between my lips. In through my nose, out through my mouth, counting six then eight, and refusing to give into the voice that shrieked in my head and tried to make me believe I was going to die on the ledge.
Shaking, I slid my leg to the left. Rough stone scratched at my calf as the outcropping barred my way. The lanterns on this side of the palace didn’t offer as much illumination, but as I peered carefully to the left, I noted the way the wall jutted forward a couple of inches. Some kind of adornment or decoration or… trim. Like on a window.
My mind started racing. Why hadn’t I seen it before? I’d been staring at this arial view of the garden for weeks, not from the death-defying ledge, but from my window in my chambers. I wanted to scream out in joy! I’d found my window! I found a way in!
And, if I was right, that meant I’d found a way to access the secret passageway.
I held my breath as I angled my body to take on the corner and its awkward angle. It made my wrist ache to turn my hand to grip the trim around the window, but I had no choice. Exhaling slowly, I didn’t look down, not even when the tiny pebbles beneath my feet tumbled over the edge and descended in a free fall to silently land three stories down. Because of the way the trim came out and the window was tucked well inside of it, I couldn’t simply pull myself around, not without tipping the scales of my balance and sending myself careening forward. But, if I could manage to keep my grip, I thought I might be able to swing myself around the edge, like a spin on the dance floor, shift from forward facing to back facing the fall, and hope my momentum would carry me in through my unlocked window.
Oh my gosh.
I did leave it unlocked, didn’t I?
That wasn’t a thought I could entertain.
Positive vibes only, I had to believe this was possible.
I drew in an uneven breath and counted it down.
One… two…
As though I wanted to sneak attack myself, I pushed off the wall, swinging forward just enough to gain inertia. I kept my shoulder tight against the trim and twisted around the outcropping and toward the window.
“Hey! There’s someone up there!”
“They’re breaking into the palace!”
“Get the guard!”
The hinged windows were closed, but as my body slammed into them, they proved they weren’t locked. I fell into the room, rolling head over heels on the carpeted floor until I came to a stop in a heap.
Floor. I wanted to kiss it. Had I ever been so in love as I was with a solid surface under my feet? Gratitude swelled in my heart as I felt the sturdy strength of the dark-blue carpeted floor beneath my palms…
My breath caught.
This wasn’t my chambers.
Using my palms, I pushed myself to my feet. None of my stuff was in the room, but that didn’t mean it wasn’t familiar. I’d been in here before, but only a couple of times. Still, I knew Sadie’s room and recognized her things.
My eyes locked on the one thing that didn’t belong in Sadie’s room. Near the door, surrounded by two wedding dresses of the purest white, was my ball dress. The audacity! Hadn’t she taken enough? She was going to raid my closet as well?
Anger surged in my heart at what she’d put me through. Was it petty that I wanted to smash anything that belonged to her, just to get some kind of revenge?
I didn’t have time. I gripped my top and gave it a tug as if to make myself presentable. That was a laugh after what I’d been through. I was lucky all my limbs were still attached. Staying around to fix myself up or cause a little mayhem simply wasn’t in the schedule and I couldn’t afford to risk it. I needed to get to the ball to be sure Sadie didn’t make a little chaos of her own. She was small, but with her skills, she was mighty.
My mind caught on the thought. In reality, she was only as powerful as her elixirs and brews. If I had a few of my own, wouldn’t I be just as powerful against her?
I started searching the room for a trunk or a box, something that would hide her stash. Under the bed, in the nightstand, in the trinket box on the mantle, all a bust. I crossed my arms over my chest, frustrated to be so close and yet not. I noted the chair in the corner, strewn with dresses Sadie had worn recently. She didn’t even bother to clean them up. What kind of queen would she make? I frowned. At least my room was clean.
But that was the weird part. The rest of the room was clean. Only her clothes were out. I cast a glance at the armoire against the wall. I’d fit my entire wardrobe in the massive piece, and yet Sadie left her clothes out, not even bothering to hang them up.
Unable to shake my suspicion, I crossed the room and pulled back the doors on her armoire. Glass rattled within, and I understood why. Hundreds of bottles lined the shelves within the armoire. Small vials, much like the ones I’d seen in the tower, stood silently waiting like soldiers at attention. Sadie’s arsenal that was meant to take Nolcovia to their knees. Each row of colored liquid had a sign at the front.
Burn Remedy
Sleep Aid
Tranquilizer
Mood Enhancer
I continued to search for the label I could use against her. There had to be something that would…
My fingers locked around one that would change everything. It would cause more damage to Sadie than I could have hoped possible and if I dared use it, there would be no coming back.
Time had run out. I needed to put my plan in action. I closed the doors on the armoire and started for the hallway to hurry to my room where I could access the secret passageway. I made it almost all the way to the door before I glanced back at the dress I’d created with my own two hands. Could I really leave it here for her? But what was the alternative? Changing into it and bursting into the ballroom to declare my love for Fitz?
It actually sounded a lot better than my other plan.
A princess was only as valuable as her crown, but by another token, a foreign party crasher might only look as beautiful as her ball gown.