Chapter 30 Cade
CADE
I’m thankful I have time to shower before Ansel wakes up. I don’t want to scare him. I don’t think he’ll mind how I dealt with it…but knowing it and seeing the evidence of it are two different things.
I’ve kept my crazy mostly under lock and key. I don’t want this to be the thing that breaks us apart.
I use the shower in a guest room, only sliding into the bedroom Ansel and I have been using after I’m clean. Ansel is fully sedated, and Dr. Ramsey is working diligently on his hands. I swallow back bile as I catch sight of them. The twisted mass of broken bones barely resembles anything human.
I was too easy on Vex. I should’ve made it last longer. More painful.
My poor butterfly. Crushed but not broken. I should’ve protected him better. What if he doesn’t get better? What if he can’t use his hands properly in the future?
Then you’ll be his hands for him.
“He’ll be okay,” Dr. Ramsey says softly. He’s not looking at me, but he knows I’m here. And what I’m thinking. “It’ll be a long journey, but I’m confident he’ll regain full use of his hands.”
Some of the tension leeches from me. “I just don’t want him to be in pain.”
“He’s heavily dosed up. I’ll stay until he’s awake and ensure his pain levels are manageable.”
“How long will that be?”
“It’s hard to say. Both his body and mind have experienced massive trauma. He may stay asleep for several hours yet.”
I growl in impatience. Why can’t I just speed up time and make Ansel better now? “Are you sure there’s nothing else—”
“Cade.” Dr. Ramsey’s tone is firm but kind. “I know what I’m doing, I promise. Your Ansel is in the best possible hands. Now, go and find something to do until he’s awake. I need to focus, and your presence is distracting.”
I grind my teeth together, preparing to insist that I stay at Ansel’s side, when I remember the meeting. Fuck.
I can’t skip it. The Umbra Syndicate isn’t just The Firm’s business.
They’ve made it personal. I’m going to be part of their downfall every step of the way.
Starting with this meeting.
Besides that, I’ve got a few things I need to…discuss with Wylder. I might’ve let it slide earlier, but there’s no way I’m going to forget the way he tried to pin this all on Ansel.
He needs to accept that my butterfly is part of the family now, and he could’ve died trying to protect us.
He deserves loyalty from every single one of us.
Including Wylder.
“Send for me the second he’s awake,” I growl at the doctor before striding from the room.
I’m barely eight feet down the corridor before Neo steps into view. “How is he? Is he awake?”
My ire softens at the fear on Neo’s face. I’m not the only one who loves Ansel, and I’m surprisingly okay with that. He deserves all the love in the world. Not the same kind I give him, but this platonic love?
I want it all for him. I truly do.
“He’s injured but okay.” I pat Neo’s arm. “Feel free to go and sit with him for a while. Don’t ask questions though, or the doctor will kick you out.”
Neo clicks his tongue. “Like Wylder just did. Apparently, only family members are allowed to know official Firm business.”
It’s strange knowing we don’t have to hide ourselves around Neo now. Not that I spent much time with him before, but he’s going to be a big part of our lives going forward, with how close he is to Ansel. “Don’t be offended. It’s just how it is.”
“Whatever.” Neo scuffs his sneaker against the rug. It’s an antique, bought by Wylder at some fancy-ass auction. I smirk at how he’d react if he could see the way Neo is abusing it. “It’s not like you’ve got any secrets from me. I protected them for you, remember?”
“Yes, and I’m sure Wylder’s grateful for it.”
Neo rubs his upper arm and scowls. “Wylder would be grateful for my absence and that’s about it.”
I don’t think that’s as true as Neo believes it to be. Nor Wylder, for that matter. “Why do you care? Wylder’s straight, and don’t you have a boyfriend?”
“Yeah.” His sneaker goes back to snagging the rug. “Guess he is, and guess I do. Don’t know why I’m letting him get under my skin so much.”
Interesting. I don’t think Wylder’s ever gotten under a woman’s skin before. I know for certain that no woman has ever got under his. Certainly not fucking Candace, who he still needs to officially ditch.
Maybe Wylder’s been looking in all the wrong places.
I keep that crackpot theory to myself. If this is gonna implode over us all, it’ll be better to just sit back and watch. And so much more fun.
“Go sit with Ansel. And remember, no questions.”
“I’m not very good at that.”
That draws a chuckle from me. “Me neither. But that’s why I’m out here and not in there, so learn from my mistakes.”
I take a few steps away before Neo calls out, “Hey, Cade?”
I turn to him questioningly.
“Don’t let Ansel out of your sight,” Neo says. “I mean it. He needs to be at your side at all times. I need him safe.”
“Me too. Trust me. That’s exactly where I plan on keeping him.”
I’m the last of my brothers to arrive. Wyatt is also present…as is Jackson.
I raise a brow as I take my place around the conference table. “So Neo’s not allowed to sit in, but Jackson is?”
“Jackson’s family,” Dalton says gruffly before Wyatt has a chance to do more than open his mouth. “He has every right to be here.”
“Thanks.” Jackson’s grin is something to behold. As is the adoring way he’s staring at Dalton.
I’m not the only one who notices. Samson winces alongside me. Matthias’s eyes narrow as Wyatt’s lips purse. All of us know that Dalton will never go for Jackson. Even in a few years’ time, when he’s well into adulthood, it’s unlikely Dalton will ever see him in that way.
This road is going to lead to resentment and broken hearts. Problem is, Dalton doesn’t seem to know it. Hell, he doesn’t even realize he’s in the car with Jackson, thundering along the highway to the inevitable crash at the end.
“Jackson’s my brother,” Wyatt says. “Surely that gives him a right to be here?”
I nod slowly. “I’m not arguing with that. But Neo is the closest thing Ansel has to a brother. And given what he already knows about us, it seems pointless to exclude him.”
“Neo’s a distraction,” Wylder says dismissively. “What’s more, we don’t know if we can trust him.”
Oh, I’m so glad he said that. “Like how you thought we couldn’t trust Ansel? Remind me, how’d that work out?”
Wylder doesn’t meet my eyes. “Obviously, I was wrong. I made a mistake.”
“Your mistake almost cost Ansel his life,” I say bluntly. “If Neo hadn’t arrived when he did, we would’ve been delayed further.”
“It’s my job to distrust everyone. It’s how we keep this family together, Cade.”
“Bullshit,” I spit. “We keep it together with trust and blind faith that we have each other’s backs.”
“Much as I hate to say it, Cade’s right,” Dalton says. “You jumped to the wrong conclusion, Wylder. Admit it.”
“I have already admitted it, Dalton. I was wrong, and I apologize. When Ansel’s awake, I fully intend on apologizing to him, too.
” Wylder gets to his feet, leaning with his knuckles on the table.
“But I would like to point out that my job is to keep all you fuckers safe and alive. Sometimes that means making the calls no one else wants to. Sometimes it means taking an educated fucking guess and hoping like shit that it’s the right one.
Now, if any of you want to step up and take my place, be my fucking guest.”
My jaw isn’t the only one swinging open. I don’t think Wylder’s said that much in a row in…well…ever. Or cursed as much.
Guilt prickles over my skin. I’m still pissed that Wylder even dared to accuse Ansel of betraying us…but I don’t think I’ve ever thought about the pressure on him. As the oldest, he’s not just the head of our household, but the entire Firm.
That’s a lot of weight to carry.
“Sorry, Wylder.” I give him a sheepish smile. “I’m just protective of Ansel, ya know? I’m not criticizing how you run things, honestly.”
“I know.” He drops into his seat heavily. “And I’m sorry for not believing you when you said he wasn’t responsible. I’ll try to do better in the future.”
“And none of us thinks we can do a better job,” Matthias adds. “But if you need more help, Wylder, you only need to ask.”
“Thank you,” Wylder says stiffly. Of all of us, he’s the one who struggles to show his emotions. Which makes sense, given he’s the one Dad tortured the most. “I appreciate it.”
The conversation moves on to the little we learned from Vex, which is basically nothing more than knowing that the Umbra Syndicate isn’t going to back down without a fight.
I won’t lie, that suits every one of us perfectly.
After that, Wylder and Dalton explain what they’ve been able to surmise from the documents Ansel secured.
The Umbra Syndicate is what Wylder calls an “up and coming” gang in Eastgate.
“Evidently, they’re looking to extend their reach and wealth.
From what Ansel has provided, I believe their plan was to discover information that they could blackmail us with. ”
Matthias’s brows draw together. “Blackmail us to do what?”
“Your guess is as good as mine,” Wylder muses. “But I imagine parting with a large sum of money and using our connections to aid their growth would be on the list. Along with turning a blind eye as their corruption spreads through St. Dismas.”
I suck in a breath. Yeah, that’s not happening. Even if they hadn’t hurt my butterfly, we wouldn’t have allowed that.
St. Dismas is ours to protect, just as we’ve done for generations.
Just as I’ll do for Ansel for the rest of my days.
I tap my fingers on the table. “So we need to track down all the key players and eliminate them.”
“Yes,” Wylder replies. “And in doing so, we’ll be sending a message not only to Umbra, but to everyone that The Firm is not to be fucked with.”
“Should we be concerned that Umbra knows the Buckinghams are The Firm?”
Wyatt’s question has us all exchanging looks. However, I’m the one who answers. “Honestly? I think they already knew. I took a gamble back in the cabin and sent them a selfie. Once they realized who was with Ansel, they messaged saying he was on his own.”
Matthias sits back in his chair. “Why would they back off only to then turn around and blackmail Ansel to get information on us?”
“I can answer that,” Dalton says, tapping one of the many sheets of paper. “Ansel included transcripts of their messages. Looks like he asked them the same question.”
I lean forward. “What did they say?”
Dalton’s gaze skims over the text. “They said, ‘We were prepared to let this go, but then we realized what a unique position you’re in. No one can get close to The Firm…apart from you.’”
I run a hand through my hair. “So they went after Ansel because they saw how obsessed I am with him.”
“Don’t blame yourself,” Wylder says. “This is all on them.”
“Oh, I’m not.” I grin. “It is all their fault. I’m just low-key proud that my love for Ansel shines so brightly that even evil henchmen can spot it.”
A collective groan goes around the table. It just makes my grin wider. They better get used to me crowing about my feelings for Ansel, because I’m sure as shit not keeping them to myself.
“Okay, next question.” Samson turns his head to Wylder. “How’d they bug the house?”
“Remember the burst pipes? We think they were installed then, but the security company we hired to remove them is going to analyze them to see what date they started transmitting data.”
Well, that’s something, at least. Guess we’re going to have to be a lot more careful about who we let into our homes in the future.
“I’m guessing those two tonight weren’t the head honchos,” Harley says, pursing his lips. “Vex was far too cocky to actually have any power.”
“He was merely an enforcer, nothing more,” Wylder says as we all nod. “Thanks to Ansel, we have some names and addresses to look into.”
My chest swells. My butterfly is so fucking smart.
Then Wylder says something that has it deflating instantly. “And, once he’s better, he can help us find out more.”
“No he fucking can’t.”
Wylder frowns at me. “Why not?”
“Because he can’t,” I all but growl. “It’s too dangerous. He’s already put his life on the line to protect us once. He’s not doing it again.”
“Cade, be reasonable. Ansel can—”
“No.” I glare at him, my dagger finding its way into my hand. “That’s final. Find another way, Wylder. Ansel is my line, and I won’t cross it. Not even for any of you.”
There’s a tense moment before Dalton gives a low whistle. “Fuck me. Never thought I’d see the day Cade was whipped, but apparently it’s here.”
“It’s been here for a while.” Matthias rolls his eyes. “Or do I need to remind you of his hissy fit when we ‘rescued’ him.”
My cheeks color. “I did not throw a hissy fit.”
Harley giggles. “You kinda did, dude.”
I go to argue with him, but the door swings open. Neo appears, a huge smile on his lips. “Ansel. He’s awake.”