Chapter 29 I Will Try To Fix You #2
Hannah, still holding the letters in her hands, stood unmoved, her eyes as cold as ever. “I didn’t ask for any of this,” she said, her tone sharp and distant. “Don’t you think I’ve been fighting my own battles too? Don’t you dare make this about me.”
Wynter’s jaw clenched, and for a moment, he wanted to shout, to break her down piece by piece. But he couldn’t. He couldn’t bring himself to do it in front of everyone. His anger, now simmering beneath the surface, felt dangerous, like it would consume him whole if he let it.
Yesoh was standing there right outside, she had silently trailed behind him.
She always seemed to be there. He was ashamed; for how he had acted, how he’d spoken he couldn’t bare to face her.
He felt betrayed by the first girl he’d ever let in and it was a massacre that wasn’t enough to be witnessed by only him but everyone had seen him be taken to the slaughter.
He walked right past her and kept walking and she thought he didn’t notice but she followed, every step away from March house, in her own way it was her assuring him that she wouldn’t let him hurt alone.
But when he didn’t turn back, even Yesoh knew that she couldn’t push. And so she let him be.
Her hand reached and then retracted— he would never reach back.
Yesoh was a silent witness to the unraveling of everything he thought he knew. For the first time, she saw him—really saw him—as more than just the caretaker, the protector. She saw the cracks in his armor, the pieces of him that had shattered under the weight of everything left unsaid.
And in that silence, everything began to change.
The air in the living room felt thick, heavy with everything unsaid. Wynter stood in front of his sisters, his heart wrapped in a thousand knots. He had no script, no rehearsed words. Only the raw ache of regret.
Bae and Beck sat side by side on the couch, arms folded, watching him with silent contempt. Jiwon stood by the window, her back to them, as though she couldn’t even bare to look her big brother in the eye. Wynter took a breath, steadying himself.
“I owe you all an apology,” he began, his voice low, as though it pained him to speak at all.
“I invited someone into our lives who shouldn’t have been there.
I let her into your space without consideration of how you might’ve felt.
And I think it’s very important that I express that I won’t let that happen again. ”
“She ate my Mac and cheese.” Bae complained eyebrows furrowed.
“She left her underwear on the bathroom floor.” Beck pointed out.
Jiwon nervously bit her fingernails in silence.
“I thought I was keeping control,” he went on, his eyes scanning the room, but never quite meeting their gaze.
“I didn’t realize she was being obnoxious and leaving her stuff around the house for you to pick up after her.
I should’ve seen how she made you feel— but I was clouded by how she made me feel, too—too wrapped up in her to see you.
I let her invade our space. And I’m so sorry. ”
Wynter sat down on the floor in front of them.
“Do I get my Mac and cheese replaced?” Bae wondered out loud. “If not I can never restore your honor!”
“I’ll turn on the food network and make you a whole pot just for yourself.
I know I can’t erase what’s happened. But I promise you, I’ll never let anyone do that again—never again will I let something or someone come between us.
Especially someone you guys don’t take a liking to.
If I ever bring a girl around next, I’ll ensure that she’s someone with strong character, who you guys love to be around as much as I do.
You are my family. And I will do whatever it takes to protect your peace too. ”
He bowed deeply, his forehead brushing the floor as he spoke the words that had been haunting him. “Jeoreul yongseohae juseyo.” Please forgive me.
Bae was the first to budge, her expression softening. “You’re a total idiot, Wynter. Always have been.” Her voice was a whisper, almost tender. “But you’re our idiot. You don’t get to mess this up again, okay?”
Beck simply nodded. “Yeah, don’t screw this up, or you’ll really have something to apologize for.”
A sense of relief washed over him, and for the first time in what felt like forever, his chest felt lighter. But his gaze drifted back to Jiwon, who had yet to speak. She stood by the window, her face hidden from him, as though she were afraid to let him see the storm inside her.
“I’ll leave you two,” Bae said softly, pulling Beck by the hand as they exited the room. Her voice lingered in the hallway, a quiet reminder of what he had to do. Fix this.
Wynter moved toward Jiwon slowly, each step feeling like it might fracture something delicate between them. He stopped a few feet away, giving her space but never looking away.
“I hurt you,” he said quietly. “Weather that be intentionally or unintentionally. I’m starting to realize that in the real world we don’t get the privilege of being able to defend our actions by our intent.
Because all that’s left in the end are the effects of what we did, and that’s what has to be reconciled with. ”
Her shoulders tightened, and she didn’t turn to face him, as if she were shielding herself from the weight of his words. The silence between them was almost unbearable, thick with things unsaid.
“I found the letters.” He confessed. “I didn’t know you had feelings for Hannah.”
“Why would you—”
“I thought it was house mail. I’m sorry.” He assured her.
“Oh….” Jiwon sighed.
“I don’t know how to make it right, but I want to try.” He paused, his throat tight. “You deserve better than someone like that. Someone who plays with your heart. You deserve to know that I will always be here for you, no matter what. No matter who you choose to love Jiwon.”
The stillness in the room stretched. She didn’t turn. Didn’t speak.
But then, quietly, her voice broke through the silence. “You don’t get it, Wynter,” she whispered, so softly it almost didn’t reach him. “It’s not just about Hannah. It’s everything.”
His heart clenched. “Then tell me,” he said, “Tell me what it is. I’ll listen. I’ll understand.”
There was a long pause before Jiwon’s voice—fragile and full of something raw—finally broke through.
“I’ve been scared,” she whispered. “Scared of you seeing me differently. Of everyone doing so, and rejecting me.”
Wynter’s chest tightened, he wiped away her tears. “We’re your family, we just want you to be happy.”
Her shoulders shuddered before she turned to face him, her eyes filled to the brim. “I don’t want you to hate me or think I’m jealous or something and just acting out.”
Wynter stepped closer, his voice gentle. “Jiwon, I could never hate you. You’re my sister. You’re a part of me.”
She swallowed hard, her hands shaking. “Wynter, I’m a lesbian.”
“Well I figured that was pretty clear.” He chuckled with a warm smile.
“I just needed to say it out loud.” She breathed.
The words hung in the air between them, fragile and full of an unspoken weight. Time seemed to stretch, but it didn’t break.
Wynter took a long breath, his hand reaching for hers. “Thank you,” he said, his voice steady but full of a quiet awe. “Thank you for trusting me with this. And, Jiwon, I’m proud of you. I’m proud of who you are.”
Tears welled in her eyes, and the walls she had built around herself began to crumble. She took a tentative step toward him, and he pulled her into a gentle embrace.
“I’ve got you,” he whispered into her hair. “Always.”
Jiwon’s sobs came quietly, as if the weight of the years she had spent holding herself back was finally being released. She let herself fall into the safety of his arms, her tears soaking into the fabric of his shirt.
Wynter had always known that Jiwon was different, her heart softer and more fragile than most. While Bae carried herself with confidence and Beck wore her strength like armor, Jiwon was a quiet storm.
She didn’t shout when she was hurt; she withdrew.
She didn’t lash out in anger; she let it simmer in her silence.
And Wynter, as her older brother, had always felt a special responsibility to shield her from a world he knew could be unkind.
When they were younger, Wynter had been the one to dry Jiwon’s tears when she cried over stories with sad endings.
He’d sat with her for hours, gently untangling her thoughts when her mind felt too full.
Her emotions, so tender and vivid, had always run deeper than her words could express, and Wynter had learned to listen—not just to what she said, but to what she didn’t.
That moment had stayed with him, a reminder of how much she held inside. Jiwon wasn’t someone who broke easily, but when she did, the pieces were harder to put back together.
PRESENT DAY
3rd person perspective
It was dark all except for the creaking of the ice beneath his feet.
Wynter stood on the frozen lake the one that they often had picnics by under the sun.
This was the last summer that his family would spend in California.
He could feel the brittle cold seeping through his boots and into his bones, the sky above was the seemingly endless swirl of gray and dark cloud.
But something deep inside of him urged him to keep walking.
It was only then that he saw it, the shadow beneath the surface. ??
It wandered slowly at first, gliding through the frozen water with this grace that came across as a natural. Wynter's chest tightened as he strained his eyes to make out its shape. It was almost a person. A figure with long, dark hair, floating like ink in the water.
“Who’s there?” He questioned, a shiver cascaded down his spine.
The figure didn’t answer. It merely turned. Its face was pale, almost glowing in the murky depths, but it’s eyes were blackened over, bottomless and unblinking. The creature stared at him. It’s mouth opening slowly and possibly wide. Then he heard another crack.
The ice beneath his feet splintered, and suddenly he was falling and freezing water, swallowed him hole, pulling him down beneath the decks.
He attempted to kick and claw and fight the cold, but it paralyzed him freezing over his limbs and his mind.
The figure was approaching now it’s hands reaching for him desperately it’s mouth moving silently, but it couldn’t speak.
Wynter couldn’t hear the words, but he knew they were meant for him they mouth the single phrase over and over ; don’t think it don’t say it don’t think it don’t say it. ???
He glanced down at his hands, and all that was left, was a single strand of platinum white hair between his fingers. The words burned into his mind as the figures hands closed around his neck, pulling him deeper and deeper – it was then that he woke with a gasp.
He opened his eyes, distant and unfocused the memory of the creature under the ice lingering in his mind.
He swallowed hard, the words catching his throat.
His skin was slick with sweat the room dark, but the nightmare held onto him, nevertheless.
He rushed out of bed towards the light of the bathroom, he gripped the sink, his knuckles whitening against the porcelain.
He stared into the mirror, his reflection, pale and haunted.
The phrase from his dream echoed in his mind like a curse; don’t think it don’t say it.
He fought the nausea that tormented him, wanting to rid him of all things painful but it never worked.
A soft knock on the door startled him, he turned and the door creaked open— it was Cahya. His expression tired and deeply concerned.
“You okay?” Cahya asked stepping into the room, beside his friend. “The nightmares again?”
Wynter attempted to open his mouth to deny it but he couldn’t, his throat raw he could only nod silently.
“They never stopped did they?” Cahya frowned,
Wynter closed his eyes his breath shallow, “Don’t.” He warned, his voice almost a whisper but it carried such weight it took Cahya aback.
“Don’t what?”
“Don’t think it don’t say it right?” Wynter repeated.
“Right.” Cahya sighed his heart aching for his friend. “Bae can’t see you like this man.”
“Don’t you think— I know okay. I know…” Wynter breathed.
“I’m not saying that you need to forget because none of us ever will but just as I’m strong for my sister, you have to be for Bae.” ?Cahya reminded him of th promise they made years ago.
The silence after that was heavy with expectation. Cahya pleased his hand on his friends shoulder.
“Wynter, what are you so afraid of?” He asked,
“That perhaps it was all my fault, that I could have stopped it, that I’ll never know why it had to happen that way.” Wynter spoke truthfully shutting his eyes.
“Do you still feel sick?” Cahya questioned, his voice softer, more patient, turning on the running water at the sink in apprehension of waking Bae.
“I don’t know…” Wyn admitted though the room spun.
Cahya studied him for a long moment before standing, and helping his best friend to his feet. “Come on let’s get you some tea.”
Wynter hesitated, glancing back at the mirror, and for slight second, he thought he saw something move in the depths of the glass, something dark, and familiar.
Something that looked like him, maybe even a little too much.
But something that was gone now and couldn’t be brought back.
but when he glanced back, it was just his own pitiful reflection once again. ?