Chapter 17 Sun Meets Shadow by. AG
Jackie
I stopped to take a breath.
I had been running as fast as possible for so long I lost track of how far I had gone. I couldn’t stop for long. I couldn’t let him catch up, or maybe I had to catch up to him?
I-I couldn’t remember.
Why couldn’t I remember?
I looked around, trying to get my bearings. I was in a forest and couldn’t see past the trees. They were everywhere and towered so high I couldn’t see where they ended. They obscured the sky but the moonlight filtered through the branches, casting shadows on the forest floor.
Fuck, I couldn’t stop.
I needed to keep running.
I took off through the trees. I needed to run as fast as I could.
My thighs burned from the exertion but I kept pushing myself.
I could hear footsteps. Were they in front or behind me?
Was I chasing someone or was someone chasing me?
Why couldn’t I remember? My feet ached, why did they hurt so badly?
I looked down to see I had no shoes on. Why did I leave without my shoes?
“Jackie!” screamed a voice in the distance. It was definitely in front of me. The voice sounded panicked. I must have been running towards them. That had to be it.
“Hello?” I yelled back. “Where are you?”
“Jackie!” the voice yelled again. They seemed closer but I couldn’t be sure.
“Who are you? Where are you?” I yelled as I ran towards where I thought the voice was coming from.
“Jackie.” The voice sounded right next to me.
I stopped dead in my tracks.
I couldn’t find the source of the voice. Who were they? The voice felt familiar but I couldn’t put my finger on who it was.
“What’s going on? Where are you?” I yelled back.
I ended in a clearing within the woods. There was a cabin in the distance that was obviously abandoned.
There were no doors, and only windows on the second floor.
There was a light in one of the windows, it flickered like a candle and was the only source of light nearby.
“You’re back. Do you remember this time?” A new voice asked. It was coming from inside the cabin that I was suddenly right next to.
“What? Who are you?” I asked, confused by everything that was happening.
The voice sighed disappointingly. “I’m sorry, I’ve explained but you never remember.”
The voice was familiar, very familiar. It made me feel safe and comforted but also hurt so deeply. I didn’t understand why.
“Who are you?” I asked the voice.
“You won’t believe me.”
“What do I call you?”
“Whatever you want, Jack. I’ll answer,” he responded. He sounded to be just on the other side of the wall.
“Why?” It was all so confusing. I didn’t know where I was, I didn’t know how I had gotten here, I didn’t know who I was talking to, but I didn’t want to leave or stop.
“It’s my job. I’ll always answer, I'll always come for you, I’ll always keep you safe.”
I was starting to remember him. I had been here before, maybe we had even had this conversation.
“Can you help me?”
“Of course.”
“Am I next?” I asked. I didn’t elaborate. I don’t know how, but I knew he would understand I was referencing what Griffin and Joey had told me. He knew I was asking if I would go missing next.
“Yes, but it’s different.”
“How?”
“In war, truth is the first casualty. The sinews of war are infinite money. Armed forces abroad are of little value unless there is prudent counsel at home. Silent enim leges inter bella.”
What?
That wasn’t a response, that was… that was completely unhelpful.
“What war? I don’t understand!” I yelled. I couldn’t understand what was happening.
“It’s starting,” he responded. “I hoped none of it was true, and if it was we were safe. I was wrong and I’m so sorry, Jack.”
“What do you mean we were safe? Who even are you?” I cried in response.
“Run, Jack. I need you to run, hard and fast and do not answer. Understand?”
“No! I have no idea what is happening! Where am I? Who are you? How did I get here?” I screamed.
“Run, Jack!” he screamed back.
I’m not sure why, but I did. I ran hard, and fast. I ran until my legs felt like they were going to give out. I ran until it hurt to breathe. I ran until I couldn’t remember why I was running.
I woke up breathing hard.
I must have had another dream. This would make one every night since we were in San Fransisco a week ago.
After Will took me to Sleepy Hollow, we headed home to Eugene the next morning with Sarah.
Once again they were calling me Mrs. Bly and I think Sarah nearly died from holding in her comments about that.
We had all agreed to take the rest of the week and the weekend to think over what we had discovered while gone.
Since I had been home I had been ignoring calls from Fai, Oliver, Sarah and Will.
In truth, the only person I had talked to was Theo.
Being in San Francisco reminded me how much I missed having her close.
I knew I could tell her everything with no judgment.
She was my person and I hers. I had called to tell her about Griffin and his strange drawings.
I told her about Will’s theory about me going missing.
I told her about my feelings for Will. She actually screamed for joy about that and then proceeded to tell Violet that I had a crush on her Willey which caused Vi to scream for joy.
I had even told her about my mysterious dreams I had been having but for some reason could not remember.
They were occurring every single night, and even when I was napping.
Anytime I would try and sleep I would wake up about four hours later wide awake in a panic.
I couldn’t remember a single thing from them or even the first minute or so I was awake.
It was disorienting. I was so exhausted. I knew I was not functioning well.
I began to stretch from my spot on my couch when I heard the phone ring in the kitchen. I looked at the time. It was about half past four.
Hmm… weird time to be calling.
I made my way into the kitchen wondering who would be calling me at four in the morning. Almost no one had my number, and those who did would only call at this time for an emergency. While yes I was avoiding everyone in my life, if it was an emergency I had to answer.
“Hello?” I asked after I had picked up the phone.
“Jackie? How did you sleep?” a voice on the other side asked.
“What? Who is this?” I asked, confused and not recognizing the man on the other side of the phone.
“I’m offended you don’t know it’s me. It’s Griffin.”
What the hell?
I was immediately wary and nervous.
“How did you get my number?”
He laughed. “That’s inconsequential, Jackie. I needed to talk with you and I needed to make sure he wasn’t around when I did.”
“He?”
“William Bly.”
I knew I should hang up and call the police, or Will, at least someone.
But this was my chance to get more information about what was happening, and just a phone call couldn’t hurt me.
In fact, it provided protection and a veil to how I truly felt.
I could use that to make Griffin believe I felt as he did.
I grabbed a pen and began to take notes, not wanting to miss a single detail if it could be helpful.
“Well, just your luck, I haven’t seen him since last Tuesday.”
“Good. He’s no good for you, Jackie. He’ll only hurt you. You saw how he acted when I was simply taking what’s mine. He hurt me, Jackie. How could you just stand by and watch that?” Griffin asked, growing more agitated.
I needed to deescalate the situation, and get him to answer some questions. I needed to appeal to him, make him think I care for him.
“I’m so sorry. I was scared to come when Will was there.”
It felt disgusting to lie about Will and use him to get to Griffin but it was my only choice. But, it seemed to be working.
“Yes, yes. Of course you’re right. Will is dangerous, it was smart to do that. We can’t have him knowing about us.”
I sighed and sat down at my kitchen table. “Exactly. Thank you for understanding. May I ask you something, Griffin?”
“Yes. Of course.”
“How did you draw those pictures of me?”
“Did you like them? I worked so hard on them for so long for you.”
“I did, I loved them, Griffin. But I don’t understand how you drew them?” I asked again.
I needed to know how he did it. It was terrifying and impossible that he was able to do that.
Some of the items in his drawings, such as wall art in my apartment, had been added since he was imprisoned.
Therefore, it was impossible that they all came from before then.
I had thought about theories of how he pulled it off.
Maybe he hired someone to follow me, maybe he had friends nearby or we had mutual friends.
When I told Theo she decided he was a psychic. So we obviously had no viable answers.
“Oh, Jackie. You wouldn’t believe me yet. Soon you’ll understand.”
Why couldn’t he give me a straight answer? That’s what I wanted to ask him, but knew that would most likely upset him. Just as I was about to respond, he cut me off.
“I have to go, Jackie. I will call again soon. Good luck.”
And with that, one of the shortest and strangest phone calls I had ever been a part of ended.
I sat for a moment and just thought.
I was so exhausted and I was so confused.
I couldn’t make sense of any of it. Griffin and Joey stating I was going to go missing.
The stalkerish behavior from Griffin, a person I had never met before.
The dreams that were non stop yet I could remember nothing from.
The case that was just supposed to be about a young boy's disappearance had evolved into my own nightmarish reality.
I could barely follow how things had escalated.
I didn’t know who to talk to about it all.
I had been lying to Fai about it for so long it was too late to come clean now.
Sarah would just want me to talk to Fai.
I couldn't burden Oliver with anything more to keep from Fai. I did tell Theo, but she was a state away and couldn’t exactly help.
That left Will, who I had been avoiding since we had gotten home.
My feelings for him were growing and expanding in ways that I didn’t understand.
It was all just too much. A few months ago my life was ordered and understandable. Now, I had no idea what was happening and just wanted a drink. One drink to help make it go away. I couldn’t do that, and I wouldn’t, but it was all I wanted.
Slowly I sank down into the kitchen floor and let it all out. I laid there and cried. The exhaustion only heightening my confusion and fear surrounding the case, surrounding lying to Fai, and surrounding Will.
It was all too much to handle. I cried so hard my eyes were swollen and my voice was gone. I let all my emotions out, I let myself feel everything fully. I just let myself be free for one night.
Once my tears had dried up, I laid and watched the sun come up through the window.
At some point my cat, Jedi, had found me and laid next to me.
I knew I couldn’t ignore my life any longer.
I had to go back to work. I had to call Will back.
Hell, I needed to go grocery shopping to finally have food.
And I would do it all, but first I just needed to feel.