CHAPTER TEN
WARD
I STAND IN MY OFFICE—WHICH I still maintain at Montgomery Enterprises—with one hand nestled in the pocket of my Tom Ford pants and the other holding a coffee mug to my lips as I stare at the gorgeous woman on TV.
Penelope.
My Penelope.
She’s not yours.
“This morning on the breakfast show we have Penelope Goldsmith here from Paws Welfare. Good morning.”
“Good morning, Kelly.” Penelope smiles, and the sound of her smooth, sexy voice slides through my body like a lightning bolt.
I can’t look away. I’m mesmerized.
And I miss her like fucking crazy.
She’s wearing an apple green pant suit which looks stunning with her long straight dark hair and same-colored eyes.
I’m almost breathless watching her.
It’s been two-and-a-half weeks since she walked away from me and my children found out I was dating.
Which is a lie.
We never dated.
But I wasn’t going to say I fucked her twice. She told me she could love me, then I never called her again.
That doesn’t mean I haven’t thought about her every damn day. Because I have. I crave her being in my arms again, and the thought of her out with other men makes me restless.
And a little unhinged.
She belongs to me.
I curse, remembering the moment I said my wedding vows to Tina, and try to work out how another woman could so quickly mean something to me.
Because she does.
“The work you’re doing to help improve the lives of farm animals is highly commendable. Tell us how it works.”
“Well, we’re asking consumers to vote with their wallets at the checkout. When you see products with the little blue heart logo”—an image appears on the screen behind her—“you know our auditors have been on their farms.”
“How does this help the animals?” Kelly asks.
“Farmers must meet our standards. If they don’t, they can’t use the logo. A logo which consumers know to mean the animals were living their best lives. The more consumers that choose blue heart products, the more farmers will be encouraged to join.”
“And more happy animals.” Kelly nods, smiling.
“Exactly.”
“But you pay a little more.”
“You pay the true price of farming. Animal cruelty occurs from cutting corners. It’s as simple as that. But consumers are driving this, so they get to choose.”
“I know what I’m choosing.” Kelly nods emphatically.
“Me too.”
Penelope’s pride hits me straight in the chest. Suddenly, I want to be in that studio with her, waiting to pull her into my arms and congratulate her on getting in front of the nation this morning.
It’s not easy.
And not with a highly sensitive topic like animal welfare.
My finger itches to reach for my phone.
“Is that her?” A voice asks behind me.
I turn to face Knox.
He’s the marketing director at Montgomery Enterprises and when I’m in the office, which is at least once a week, we always meet.
“Yes.” When I glance back, she’s gone, and an advertisement is on the screen. I reach for the remote and turn it off.
“She’s beautiful.” My eldest son says, leaning against the doorjamb.
“She is.” I smile, shaking my head at how I reacted to seeing her.
I need to get control.
When I glance back at Knox, his usual broody expression is there but he’s studying me.
“You like her.”
If there’s one child I cannot hide from, it’s Knox. Or maybe Bella. But she’s sensitive rather than intuitive, like her brother.
“I do, but like I told you on the weekend, I’m not dating. It’s too soon. I love your mother and miss her like crazy.”
“Loved.” He responds and I lift my brows, unimpressed.
“ Love. Love doesn’t die when a person does.” I snap angrily.
Just because Tina, his mother, isn’t here doesn’t mean my feelings were buried with her. I hate that he might think that. This is exactly the sort of thing I want to avoid.
I still love her very much.
I still wish she was here.
I still wish she was my wife...and yet I can’t ignore my feelings for Penelope, either.
Even though I’m fucking trying.
“Hey. Sorry. I get it. Well, maybe I don’t. If Payton died, I think I’d die along with her. A part of me, anyway,” Knox says.
He would.
That boy loves his wife the way I loved his mother. Which is part of the reason I didn’t give him the CEO role. I considered it, but because I have all the years of experience I have, I knew this was the right thing for them.
The position is rightfully his. By birth. It will be there once he and Payton have had time together and created their family.
I nod, calming down.
Knox doesn’t deserve my wrath. I’m angry with myself. Not him.
“But Mom wouldn’t want you to be alone.”
I should have known he wouldn’t drop it. This kid—this grown man—is too much like me.
“Knox, I’ve heard it a million times from others. Please. Don’t.” I sigh and walk around my desk.
He’s silent as I sit and open my laptop. It won’t last. I know my son; he’s simply choosing his words. When I lift my head, begging him silently to let this go, he walks in and closes the door.
“Knox,” I warn.
“Dad.” He slides his hands into his pants pockets and glances down at the floor.
If he’s praying, he’s looking in the wrong direction.
I think.
Then he lifts his face, emotion rich in his eyes, and I curse silently.
“You know I’m not one to talk about feelings and shit,” he starts.
No kidding.
Which is why I’m a little floored right now.
“I miss Mom just as much as anyone. Seeing you with someone else is going to be weird as fuck,” Knox says while my heart slowly cracks.
“But what I just saw on your face while you were watching her...and I’m your son, so this is awkward.”
“Yeah, so maybe—”
“I think you love that woman.”
What?
I avert my eyes, unable to look at him.
Of all the kids to say this to me, I would never have bet on it being him. Never in a million years.
“No. Son. Knox listen,” I start, but my words fade away to nothing as our eyes meet once more.
I stare at my son while he stands there holding space for me to catch up. Instead, I slump back into my black executive leather seat and curse.
When did my kids get smarter than me?
“It took me ages to figure it out,” Knox says, referring to his wife. “Dad, I watch people date and break up around me and consider myself lucky to have met Payton. Luckier that I didn’t fuck it up and lose her.”
He is.
I watched from the sidelines.
“So perhaps, and fuck, I don’t know, but if you’re lucky enough to be loved by two women in this life, then don’t let her get away.”
All the oxygen leaves my body.
“Jesus, when did you become Oprah?”
“Fuck knows. Probably some osmosis stuff from Payton rubbing off.” Knox rubs his jaw and shoots me a sly grin.
I let out a small laugh.
“Bella will be okay,” Knox adds. “We’ll make sure of it.”
I know they will. She might be their older sister, but the boys love her so intensely I still don’t know how Blake was able to marry her.
I’ve never worried about my little girl—even though she doesn’t have my DNA, only her mother’s—because Atlas, Knox, and Levi have protected her even when they weren’t big enough.
And drove her crazy the entire time.
Now, she has an even more protective husband... which is exactly why they allowed her to marry him.
And when I say “allowed,” I mean it.
I glance at the black screen of the TV and wonder if she is still at the studio.
If you are lucky enough to love two women in this life, then don’t let her get away.
I push back my chair.
My heart rate picks up as an idea begins to percolate.