CHAPTER FOURTEEN
PENELOPE
I CAN BARELY FOCUS on what Dr. Qwann is telling me. She’s throwing numbers and data at me while I nod, but all I can think about is the Ward waiting outside the room.
“You will need to get these tests done to determine the quality of your eggs and if you have enough. Then we will talk through the best way to move forward,” she tells me.
What she hasn’t done is give me false hope. In fact, if anything, she’s been rather pessimistic. If I wasn’t so agitated by the six-foot-four distraction sitting outside, I might have felt quite crestfallen.
If you want a baby, I will give you one.
I am not going to let myself believe his words. It was said in the heat of the moment and without thought.
I think I fucking love you!
It’s taken him two weeks to respond to what I said and for some reason he needs to tell me as I take this enormous step in life.
Sure, I might not be successful in getting pregnant via IVF, but just coming to this appointment has been emotional. Walking through the building having Ward in tow only added to that pressure.
“Penelope?”
“Yes, sorry.” I nod, annoyed with myself for not paying attention.
I write down a few things, trying to stay focused so I can remember everything. I’m handed dozens of pamphlets and the form to get the tests done.
Should I choose to proceed.
I don’t have a choice.
My suspicion is that Ward and I have a connection that is hard to walk away from. The chemistry between us is like a blistering heat and highly addictive. He wants me as much as I want him, but that doesn’t mean it will work out.
I have this last chance—hopefully—to have a child, and so I am going to choose to proceed. If I didn’t, and I waited for him, then never had a baby, I’d end up bitter.
I’m already angry at myself for not doing this sooner.
You can’t turn back time, but you can make decisions now that create what you want.
“You should stop taking the contraceptive pill immediately,” Dr. Qwann says, scribbling on a notepad.
“Oh, I stopped it last y—”
She looks up. “Have you had a test?”
I shake my head.
“Are you regular?”
I nod.
“When was your last period?”
I must go pale, because she smiles, pushes her chair back and pulls open her drawer, while my heart beats loudly in my ears.
I don’t hear another thing she says.
There’s no way...