64. Charlie
Charlie
Home feels a bit warmer tonight. I’m not sure what changed.
The house is packed with family and friends who came to celebrate Ryder’s graduation.
A group of football players huddle up in the kitchen taking photos.
Ryder has an arm around two of his teammates, all of them congratulating him.
He gave the biggest speech to thousands of people.
I never thought I’d cry at a graduation, but watching him stand up on a podium telling his story had me bawling my eyes out.
Mom actually looks happy and healthy again serving cheese squares to half the team. Noah’s been helping her in the kitchen all evening, and I think she’s finally opening up a bit to him. To be honest, she kind of doesn’t have a choice either.
I’m still trying to process Ryder getting drafted into the NFl too and that Payton is moving to Los Angeles with him. It’s not like I’m staying either. Later tonight I’m hitting the road with Noah to go on his tour, and the reality of that is barely setting in.
I slip down the hallway into my bedroom.
The tack holes are still visible, even the loosely hanging tape lays untouched from when I packed up to leave for college.
I glance at the photos sitting on top of my dresser.
I run a thumb over one of the frames, picking up the photo of Ryder, Payton and I.
We were hanging out by the pool on a hot summer day.
Ryder isn’t glancing at the camera like Payton and I. He’s smiling down at her.
“Hey…” I hear Ryder say behind me, and I swivel around the second he knocks his index finger on the door.
“What’s up?” I place the photo back down, making sure to adjust it so it doesn’t look crooked.
“What’cha looking at?” he asks, inviting himself in. “I remember that day,” he points to the photo before dipping his hands into his pockets. “You two were being little shit-heads.”
“Do you remember that stupid video Payt made?” I bring a hand up to my lips holding in a chuckle.
“Yeah I fell asleep on a floatie, and she kept whispering in my ear, Sebastian Sebastian knowing damn well I hate my first name. Since I didn’t wake up she took the damn pool noodle and hit me with it." He mimics that whack of the noodle with his hands.
“You yelled at her, don't call me that!”
“Stop being so crabby you stupid crab!” Payton interjects. Ryder and I both turn our attention to the doorway she’s standing in. She leans her head against the door frame, her cheeks red as she looks at my brother. “You were being such a jerk. I wanted that floatie,” she points a finger at him.
“Did you really have to nickname me after The Little Mermaid?”
It’s silent for a moment, and we can only hear the sound of the party outside the walls before she subtly says, “Yes… but I did not mean for that video to go viral, blame your sister for posting it.” She raises her hands up to her shoulders.
“By the way, your mom says she can’t get the grill to turn on and needs your help.
” Payton flashes us a desperate smile then winks at him.
“I don’t know how to use it either. I think we are out of propane.
” Her eyeballs are darting at him to vacate the room with her teeth gritted together.
“I’ll be right there babe. There should be one in the garage.” Ryder’s eyes light up.
Babe? God, they are so gross. “I’ll let her know.” Payton bounces on her toes before slipping out of the room.
He reverts his attention back to me, wiping his mouth. “So uhh… mom showed me an old photo album and I think you might want this.” He digs into his back pocket and pulls out a picture. He holds it out to me, and I take it.
“Oh, it’s my baptism photo.” I study it seeing a huge group of kids, including myself, with our hands in prayer position. I cringe at the white dress mom shoved me into. It was too big and poofy for a twelve year old. “So, what’s the big deal about this photo?”
“Look at it again, maybe you’ll see it.”
I bite the inside of my cheek scanning it again at everyone in the photo.
Two rows of people behind me I spot him, and my heart instantly melts.
“Is that…” I gasp my mouth falling to the floor…
“Oh my god. It’s Noah.” I let out a breathy laugh.
“He was baptized with me that day?” I glance back and forth between Ryder and the photo.
“And he’s so skinny, he must have been fifteen. ”
“I thought you might like it…and I also wanted to apologize for trying to beat the shit out of him… and I apologized to him too… like less than two minutes ago.”
“Oh…”
Ryder places a hand over my shoulder and tugs me in for a hug. I fold into him easily, wrapping my arms around him. Thank god he doesn’t smell like sweaty feet. “I’m sorry,” he murmurs into my hair. “I should've protected you better.”
“Stop,” my voice cracks instantly, my face grows hot and I can’t stop the tears. They come fast and I bury myself into his chest to hide them.
He squeezes me tighter. “You’re my baby sis. I...”
“You stopped him… that’s… that’s all that matters.” He squeezes me tighter and I’m afraid he might rip the fabric of my dress. “You're the best brother a little sister could have. You didn’t do anything wrong, you did everything you thought was right, and I’ll forever love you, you stupid heifer.”
He pulls back and looks at me, his jaw tight, eyes shiny. He presses his forehead against mine, blinking back tears. “I love you too.” He releases me, and points a thumb over his shoulder toward the door. “I’m gonna go help mom.”
“Okay.”
Ryder wipes his eyes and straightens out his shirt. He puts his hands in his pockets trying to look unfazed. Ever since he’s been steady with Payton, he’s turned into a puddle of emotions.
I plop down onto my mattress as he leaves my room.
I admire the photo he gave me, but it doesn’t take me more than two seconds to whip out my phone to take a picture of it.
As I log into my instagram I can’t help but scroll through all the photos Noah and I have taken.
I adore the ones he’s taken of me buried in my journal at the studio.
He always writes little love notes in the captions.
The ones we’ve taken together give me the warmest, fuzziest feelings in my chest. There is one with us tangled together in his sheets.
I’m fisting a blanket up to my lips. My cheeks are flushed, even my hair is a disaster.
It’s a dead give away what we were up to by the way Noah is nuzzled between my neck.
The comments were rather ridiculous too, some wishing they could sit on his face, others complimenting me or just hating the fact Noah cut his hair.
Regardless, that was us waking up in the morning after a passionate night, and starting our morning off getting high off each other.
That memory still sets my thighs on fire.
There are footsteps down the hallway, so I turn a shoulder and spot Noah strolling past my room, then back peddling his steps.
“There you are,” he says, slipping inside my room. “You disappeared.” He closes the door with a click. “It's like I haven’t seen you all night.”
I lift a brow as his feet thud across the floor. He collapses onto the mattress with his hands supporting the back of his head.
“Look at this,” I say, handing him the picture. He adjusts himself, tilting his head to the side. “I’m below you.” I point down at myself, and my hideous gap-toothed smile.
“Oh wow!” He props himself up with an elbow. “I don’t recall seeing you that night.”
“Me either, but isn’t that crazy.? We got baptized together that night.”
“Damn, you’re gorgeous.”
“Calm down, I have a boyfriend…” I press a hand to my chest.
Noah coughs up a laugh. “Oh… he’s a lucky guy.”
I kiss him on the cheeks before sliding off the bed. “I have to use the ladies room. I’ll be right back.”
I’m probably thinking too much as the water running is turning into white noise and I’ve been washing my hands a little longer than usual.
I watched my brother propose to Payton at his graduation ceremony.
Noah kind of just blurted it out in the open about getting married.
We went to the church and got a folder with all the steps we needed to take, but that was about it.
I shut off the faucet, shaking off my hands, and using the hand towel that was a little too damp for my liking to dry them.
When I step out of the restroom I head over to my room, and halt the second I see Noah opening a little velvet box in his hand.
My face burns red and I pin myself to the wall, hoping he didn’t see me.
“Hey… are you still in there?” he calls out and I clear my throat, counting a few seconds before stepping back into the doorway. Noah puts his hands in his pockets with a subtle smile and meets me in the hallway.
“I’m a bit hungry, do you want to grab some snacks?
” he asks before lifting up his elbow for me to wrap my arms around.
I give him a mhm and we stroll down the hallway.
A little trail of rose petals litters the floor, and my heart feels like it’s skyrocketing out of control.
He leads me towards the kitchen where it’s completely empty.
Where did everyone go? We follow the petals curving around the kitchen counter.
There isn’t a sound other than a guitar strumming outside on the patio and my heart beating in my eardrums. My fingers dig into his arms and I physically can't let him go as my legs turn into pure jelly.
When we step outside everyone is there in an accumulation of rose petals shaped into a heart and tiny candles encompassing them.
Noah’s band mates are there, with Omen playing the guitar, and Payton is leaping on her toes with the biggest grin on her face.
Ryder is wiping the tears in his eyes, hugging mom as she covers her face with an overused tissue.
“Both of my babies are getting married.” She blows her nose.
I release my grip from Noah's arm, but he reaches for the tips of my fingers pulling me to the center of the heart. I’m a blubbery mess, sucking in air as I face Noah – finally realizing how nervous he actually looks.
Sweat peppers his forehead despite the cool breeze.
He swallows hard, rubbing his palm against his jeans before giving a shaky laugh.
“I know I kinda blurted out that we should just get married,” he stammers out, and I watch the bulge in his throat jump up and down with another gulp. “I jumped the gun on that one, but I wanted to make sure I did this right.”
His fingers fumble in his pocket, nearly dropping the velvet box.
Then he gets down on one knee. “If I could have anyone in this world cause me trouble for the rest of my life, it would be you.” He opens the little box and there is a white-gold crown of thorns engagement ring with the perfect round-cut diamond.
“I love you Charlotte. Just like the true crown of thorns – I’ll sacrifice everything for you, weather any storm with you, it will be your reminder that I’ll commit to you, unconditionally, forever.
That is if you’ll have me. Will you marry me, and cause me trouble forever? ”
I drop to my knees and meet him face-to-face, wrapping my arms around his shoulders and digging my fingers into his hair. “Always.”
Fin