Chapter 21 Deuce
THREE DAYS LATER
The prosecution brought Lena’s mom up to talk about the last phone conversation that she had with Lena, which was early the morning of her murder. Although she maintained her calm composure, she shed a few tears as she sat on the witness stand.
She boldly looked her former son-in-law in the eye as she gave her testimony. At one point, he appeared to be looking intimidatingly at her. I happened to be sitting behind him today. I had broken rank to sit on the defense’s side of the room because I wanted to send a message to him.
“Get that fucking smirk off your face before I wipe it off,” I whispered as I leaned forward over the bar from the gallery to the defense table.
Paul sat up even straighter and dared to grin at her. I stood from my seat and leaned forward more. The defense attorney was up asking questions.
“You think I’m fucking playing with you?” I grumbled.
He jumped up and spun around as if ready to fight me, and I jumped over the bar at him, but not before some of my fellow officers grabbed me and pulled me back.
I guessed some of them had been watching me all along and anticipated something jumping off.
The noise in the courtroom escalated as everyone rushed to stop the action.
“You think I don’t know what you did? I’m not stupid, Fullwood. Your secret ain’t as safe as you think it is!” he shouted at me as the guards grabbed him back too.
“Order! Order! Order in the court!” the judge shouted, banging his gavel.
“Mrs. Allen, please get your client under control. Detective Fullwood! You will not make a mockery out of my courtroom. I don’t know why you’re sitting on that side of the courtroom other than to antagonize the defendant.
The only reason I’m allowing you to stay in here is because Mrs. Ward was your partner.
As much as anyone deserves to be here, you do.
But one more outburst from you, and not only will I hold you in contempt, you will be permanently barred from these proceedings.
Do I make myself clear?” Judge Knight shouted.
My chest rose and fell as I struggled to regain my composure. I wanted to pound Paul’s fucking face into the ground.
“Do I make myself clear?” the judge repeated in a shout.
“Yes, Your Honor. I’m sorry, Your Honor.”
I headed back to the other side of the courtroom where some of my brothers closed rank around me.
Whether to protect me or to keep me from losing my shit again, I wasn’t sure.
When I looked up at the witness stand, I felt bad.
Mrs. Jones looked shaken for the first time, and I could tell that she was struggling to regain her composure as well.
I sat quietly throughout the rest of the session, struggling not to look at Paul’s evil ass. I headed out of the courtroom and took the elevator to the main lobby. I was jogging down the courtroom steps, so that I could head home, when I heard someone call out, “Detective Fullwood.”
I turned around and spotted Mrs. Jones, standing at the top of the stairs with her son and her other daughter. I slowly walked back up as she said something to her two children. They both nodded and stepped back to give her space and us privacy.
“Mrs. Jones, I apologize for my outburst back there. You didn’t deserve that. I just didn’t like the way that he was looking at you. It felt like he was trying to intimidate you.”
“Oh, he was, sugar, but I’m not scared of Paul. He can do nothing to me that the Lord won’t allow.”
“How can you be so kind to him? He doesn’t deserve it.”
“‘But love your enemies, and do good, and lend, expecting nothing in return, and your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High, for He is kind to the ungrateful and the evil.’ That’s Luke six and thirty-five.
I live according to the Word of God. As long as I have that, I can’t go wrong and nothing can break me.
“I miss my daughter and loved her so greatly. Lena called me every day and every night. She was my youngest child and my world. I know that she’s no longer suffering at that monster’s hands anymore.
Though I wish that she had made that decision quietly.
But you know Lena, when she thinks she’s getting the last laugh, she’s going to make sure that her enemy knows it.
“I know that she stayed with him and tried to make it work because she saw her daddy and me do it. Her daddy was a good man, although he had his faults. He never put his hands on me, and he loved me until he breathed his last. But it wasn’t always easy.
I think that she was trying to prove that she could have the same thing with her husband, but she fell out of love with him a long time ago. Son, I don’t blame you.”
I was so confused, and I knew she could see it on my face. “I don’t understand.”
“You blame yourself for her death. I see it on your face. You think that because she was leaving him for you, that you’re to blame.
Nothing could be further from the truth.
Thank you for loving my daughter and bringing happiness to her life in her last year.
Lena loved you with her entire being. She told me that all the time.
She would have made an excellent mother, and she was certain you were going to be a great father to your baby. ”
“You knew?”
She nodded. “She told me everything. She trusted me with her secret, and I have carried it with me and will continue to carry it. I only told you because you need to be free of the guilt that you’re carrying.
It’s time for you to let her go and move on with your life, Deuce.
She would want you to be happy. Besides, you’re not getting any younger. ”
She patted my arm and winked at me. I couldn’t help it.
I leaned down and wrapped my arms around her.
When she held me back, it felt like Lena was holding me.
I could smell the same rose scent that Lena wore on her mother.
I was not sure if Lena wore it because it was her mom’s favorite or the other way around.
Hugging her and the way that she patted my back felt like Lena was the one who was right there doing it. I could hear her whisper in my ear, “Goodbye, Deuce.”
I whispered back, “Goodbye, Lena.”
Her mother released me and smiled at me. She patted my cheek and replied, “My daughter is well, and she will get justice. Free yourself, Detective Fullwood.”
My soul felt refreshed and restored as I jogged down those courthouse steps. I felt a weight drop off me that I hadn’t realized that I was carrying. I was finally free.
I stopped by the grocery store on the way home and picked up fresh ingredients for us to make our own pizza from scratch.
By the time that I arrived, I found Sevyn in the garage working out with her new physical therapist, Allyson. Tonight would be the night that I told her the truth.
I said hello to both ladies, ran upstairs, showered, and changed. I turned music on as I cut fresh vegetables and got everything ready so that I could build our pizza.
By the time that Sevyn walked in fresh from her shower, I had pulled the pizzas out of the oven.
“What smells so delicious?” she asked, pulling her hair back into a ponytail.
“I made us a couple of veggie pizzas.”
“Yummy. I’m starving. I worked hard today.”
“Yeah, Allyson told me that you have two more sessions, and you’ll be done.”
“I know. I feel like I’ll be missing something so significant in my life without her.”
“She’s been your therapist for the last two months.” Her former therapist, Derek, had left the hospital and went to work at a private sports facility. He had referred her to Allyson before he left.
“Here. I thought you could use this,” I stated, handing her a glass of sweet tea.
She took it and sipped it. “Mm. Thank you.”
“You’re welcome,” I replied, pulling the glass from her hand and kissing her lips. I grabbed a slice of red pepper and fed it to her.
“Mmm. I love fresh vegetables.”
“I know.”
She smiled at me as she continued chewing.
“How are you feeling, Sev?”
“My muscles are tired, but I feel good and accomplished. Your sister swung by today to check on me. I thought that was sweet of her.”
“It was. She asked if you would be here all day, and I told her you would. I wasn’t sure why she asked, and I didn’t have a chance to dig into it. What did she want other than checking on you?”
“She invited me to lunch in a couple of days. I found out that, like me, she has a handbag fetish. So, we’re going shopping for bags and shoes first, then we’ll head to lunch.
She said that she needed to get out of the house and away from the kids more often than she does.
I can’t believe that she has three kids.
She really doesn’t look thirty-two. She looks closer to my age. I really like her.”
“That’s cool. I love that for you. I told you that you and my sister are a lot alike. I think y’all would be great friends.”
“What about you? How did things go today at trial?”
I sighed because I didn’t want to talk to her about it, but I knew that I couldn’t continue holding everything back. Besides, I had decided to tell her the truth about Lena and me, as well as about the night of her accident.
“Honestly, it was hard. Today was the most emotional day we’ve had since the trial started.”
“What happened?”
“I almost got into a fight. Threatened to be held in contempt of court and be banned from the courtroom.”
Her eyebrows rose and her mouth dropped open. With a quick jerk of her head backward, she asked, “But why?”
“Lena’s mother took the stand, and that slime thought he was gonna intimidate her. I warned him, he thought the shit was funny, so I had to let him know that I was dead serious.”
“Deuce. You could have let the judge and bailiff handle that. I mean, I know that she was your partner, but . . .”
“No one was doing anything. He needed to know that this wasn’t a game. This man took that woman’s life, her mother was on the stand fighting to maintain her composure, and just being the sweetest old lady, and that nigga thought it was a joke.”
Sevyn reached up and caressed my face as she searched my eyes. “I’m sorry that happened, and I’m sorry that you had to become involved. Maybe you should take a few days off. Give it some space and let things cool down before you go back.”
“This is my partner we’re talking about. I’m not about to walk out now, not when her family needs me, and not when we as a department need to make a stand.”
“Was.”
“What?”
“You said ‘This is my partner.’ She was your partner, Deuce.”
“Whatever. You know what I meant.”
“Yeah, but sometimes, I wonder if you’ve accepted her death.”
“You mean the way that you’ve accepted Ethan’s?”
“That’s different. Just because I am able to accept what is doesn’t mean that I don’t grieve him. I do, but I also know that we weren’t in a good place in our marriage. We were constantly arguing and unsure if we would make it. Not to mention he cheated on me multiple times.”
“And you took him back.”
“I did, and that was my decision. We’re not talking about someone I was in love with and couldn’t live without. We weren’t in a good place.”
“You can’t compare the two. You’re talking about a marriage versus a working relationship.”
“Are we?” she asked, lifting an eyebrow again.
“Since we’re going there, there’s something I’ve been wanting to talk to you about anyway.”
Sevyn held her hand up and shook her head. “Not tonight. This arguing we’re doing is not us. I have a feeling that whatever you have to say will only make it worse. We need to breathe.”
“But it needs to be said,” I argued.
“Not tonight, it doesn’t,” she countered, walking away from me.
“Sevyn,” I called out and grabbed her arm.
“I said not tonight, Deuce. Nothing heavy tonight. I had a hard day in physical therapy and mental health therapy. I’m not about to do this with you right now.” Her voice was stern and steady, and the glacial look in her eyes froze me in place.
My jaw clenched, I dropped my hand from her arm, and I turned away for a minute to calm down. The last thing that I wanted was to take things out on Sevyn. When I turned back again, she was watching me closely with narrowed eyes.
“What?” I asked.
She shook her head. “Nothing.”
“You sure?”
“I said light and easy tonight. That’s all I have the bandwidth to handle, Deuce.”
“Come help me set up the fort.”
“What?”
“Grab the glasses, plates, and napkins. Meet me in the living room,” I commanded.
I needed to change the subject quickly because I could see that we were going down a road that we didn’t need to travel.
The last thing that I wanted was to have an argument with Sevyn.
We had disagreed about things before, but those disagreements weren’t anything that ever got out of hand.
I wanted to tell her the truth, but I wouldn’t force it on her, especially not while we were arguing.
I headed into the spare bedroom and grabbed blankets, pillows, a box that held fairy lights, and some candles before I returned to the living room. I set those items down and grabbed my iPad. Sevyn helped me build a fort, and by the time we finished, the pizza was ready.
I fixed our plates. We settled in the fort for a movie marathon and a cozy night inside. While we ate, I thought about everything she said.
“What’s on your mind?” she asked after we finished eating.
I wiped my hands and mouth with the napkins and pulled her onto my lap.
“I’m sorry, baby. I don’t like arguing with you, and being disrespectful and rude to you ain’t what I’m trying to do. You’re my love, and I don’t want to make you unhappy.”
“I know, and I’m sorry too. Arguing with you hurts my heart because I love you so much, Deuce. I do want to know what’s on your mind, but I can’t deal with the heavy tonight.”
“Okay, just the basics. I’ve been thinking about everything that you said. Emotions are running high all around that place, not just mine. Maybe you’re right. Maybe I do need a day or two away from the trial.”
She turned in my lap and stared into my eyes. “I know that it means a lot to you, and I know that you want to show your support. Not being there doesn’t mean that you don’t care. It just means that you’re trying to balance your mental well-being. You’re going to be fine, Deuce.” She kissed me.
“I know you’re right, baby.” I wrapped my arms around her and pulled her even closer. I kissed her forehead, eyes, nose, and lips before she turned around in my lap again.
She settled in against my chest, and we watched the movie as I allowed peace to ease into my mind and soul. I wasn’t sure what I had done to deserve Sevyn, but I was thankful that God had allowed her to come into my life. She made sense out of the nonsense.