Chapter 28 #2
Nate doesn’t answer, giving Adler a jerk of his head with a signature grunt before grabbing his jacket and heading up the stairs.
We all file out the door. Adler takes off, hopping on his horse, and rides into the night as he whistles.
Toby and Nate walk toward their trucks, voices low and rumbling about something, probably more cheating accusations.
I’m about to head for my own truck when Mercer taps my arm and nods his head toward the rocking chairs.
He has that “I’m The Sheriff And We’re Having A Chat face. ”
I sigh, but drop my ass down onto one of the wooden seats. Planting my feet on the deck, I settle into the seat and rock. “What’s up, Merc?”
“I did a little more digging.” He drops into the extra chair, watching as the boys take off down the driveway.
My muscles tense, fingers flexing as I try not to show the discomfort.
“I called the police department and asked for the files on Leni’s mugging.
A detective sent me that picture I showed you.
” His fists ball up at his sides. “They said there wasn’t a mugging.
” He shakes his head, eyes turning toward me.
“They wouldn’t tell me anything else over the phone.
I won’t have any paperwork until Monday, but I need to fucking know what she’s hiding. ”
“Maybe you should ask her, instead of digging for answers behind her back.”
“You really think she’d tell me? After ten years of lying about it? What’s to stop her from lying again?” His brows furrow, the thought of asking Leni so far out of his mind that he can’t imagine it.
“I don’t know, Merc. Maybe because she’s an adult now? Maybe she had a reason for it.”
Mercer’s eyebrows go up to his hairline. His body leans back into the chair as he appraises me. “You know something…what do you know, Clay?”
“Nothing,” I scoff, looking out over the empty drive, wondering if he would follow me if I made a break for my truck. Anything to avoid this conversation.
“Nah, that’s not going to work tonight. You know something, but how?” His index finger taps his chin, eyes watching me, in a way that leaves me feeling exposed. “How do you know something? When’s the last time you talked to Leni?”
“Before I got here,” I mutter, my eyes widening in disbelief. I didn’t even realize I was saying it until the words came out. Fuck my life.
“Excuse me?” Mercer leans forward, his eyes bright with excitement. “You’re talking again? When did you start talking again?”
“I—fuck, I don’t know Merc.” My fingers pick at the seam of my jeans, eyes looking anywhere but at him right now because I’m so goddamn uncomfortable.
“Holy shit.” Mercer stands, walking to the railing of the porch, where he turns around to face me. Leaning against the banister, he crosses his ankles, then his arms, glaring. “She’s home right now, isn’t she?”
I gulp, looking at the roof of the porch. Maybe if I stare at it hard enough, it’ll collapse and take me out with it.
“I swear to God, Clay, if you don’t start talking right now, I’m going over there.”
“Fuck, yes. She’s fucking home. Okay?” I meet his eyes. The idea of him going over there and accosting her sets my teeth on edge.
“Home, as in her cabin, right? Just to clarify, my sister is in the little one-bedroom cabin that you are also occupying.”
“Yes,” I growl, fingers gripping the chair’s arms. This is such a huge violation of Leni’s trust. She told me that the one thing she needed was for me to trust that she knows what’s best for her. That she will do things in her own time, and here I am, not allowing her that privilege.
“She’s the girl you’re fucking.” Mercer uncrosses his arms, running a hand through his hair before it scrubs down his face.
“Great. I mean, I’m not mad about that part; I’ve been saying it for years.
But what the fuck, Clay? I’ve been talking non-stop about getting her home for the summer, and you’re what? Playing house with her?”
“It’s not like that. She asked for time to figure stuff out.”
“Figure what out? You and her? How did this even happen? One minute, she told me she wasn’t coming home all summer, and now she’s here, and you’re fucking. That didn’t happen overnight, so how long has she been here?”
I sigh, leaning forward, burying my face in my palms, shoulders shrugging in reply.
“You know why she lied back then, don’t you?”
“Yeah, Merc, I know.”
“This is bullshit.” Mercer marches off the porch, heading straight for his beat-up green Dodge pickup. I beeline to intercept him, putting myself between him and the truck door.
“You’re not supposed to know she’s here. You’re not even supposed to know that she found me that night. She didn’t tell you that, remember?”
“Oh, I fucking remember Clayton. So what? You’re hiding her from all of us? What does she have to figure out?”
“She feels like a failure,” I blurt, the words tumbling out of me faster than I can stop them. “You guys closed ranks on her after that summer. She didn’t want you to know she’s back because she feels like she proved you all right.”
“How? By being super successful? By putting herself through school and doing it basically alone?” Mercer looks completely baffled. Jesus, does no one realize how alienated she feels? I know that she keeps them at arm’s length, but do they not see why?
I lean against his truck, gut churning as my mouth keeps moving. “None of you wanted her to go.”
“Of course we didn’t!” Mercer shouts, his temper getting the best of him. He takes a step back, his shoulders creeping up toward his ears. “She’s our sister, our only sister. How were we supposed to protect her all the way in fucking Benson?”
“She didn’t need your protection, Merc. She needed your support, fuck, anyone’s support.”
“We have been nothing but supportive.”
“Right.” I shake my head, rolling my eyes at him. “That’s why Brooks told her she’d never make it, right? Why she avoided coming home for over a year. Because of all the support?” I wrap air quotes around support, my voice edged with a challenge.
Mercer shoves my chest, slamming my back into the pickup before he jabs a finger toward my face. “You don’t get to fucking talk. You weren’t here. Where was your support, Clay? Where were you when we got a call from a hospital in the middle of bum fuck nowhere saying she’d been hurt? Huh?”
My fingers ball into fists at my sides, heart pounding painfully in my chest. “You know where I was.” My voice comes out steady, calmer than I feel.
“That’s right,” he sneers. “You were in the hospital after you threw a tantrum so bad you scared my baby sister into getting on a bus in the middle of the night. Is that why she lied, Clay? Did you beat her up? She’s so fucking good, she wouldn’t tell us so that we wouldn’t turn on you. Is that what happened?”
“I would never hurt her, and you know it, Mercer.” A knife slices through me; he knows I wouldn’t hurt her. He has to know I didn’t do that.
“Do I? Because the Clay I knew wouldn’t lie to me. He wouldn’t hide my sister from me and keep secrets. He would’t go off half-cocked and confront his dad while he was on a fucking work call and then forget to tell me about it. So how am I supposed to know what you’re capable of, Clay? Huh?”
“Not that!” I bellow, shoving him back a step. I need space to breathe. “I wouldn’t fucking do that!”
“Then tell me what happened, Clay, because the evidence is stacked against you.” Mercer steps his feet apart, arms crossing over his chest, eyes bore into mine.
“It’s not my story to tell, Mercer.”
“Well, I’m asking you to tell me, Clay. Enough with the secrets, man. What did you do?”
The open anger in his eyes takes the wind right out of me. He’s supposed to be my best friend, my brother. “You’re supposed to fucking trust me,” I manage to calm my voice, the tenor shaking as I speak.
“How can I do that when you keep fucking lying?”
“I’m not lying now, Mercer.”
“Just go,” he spits out, disgust on his face. He starts to walk back toward his house. “I can’t even look at you.”
“Some asshole tried to rape her.” I spit the word out, knowing it’s going to hurt him, using it like a weapon, hitting my mark with expert precision.
Mercer turns slowly, his eyes wide with disbelief.
“Yeah, she was attacked in that bathroom, and she didn’t want you to know. Didn’t want any of you to know.”
The words taste bitter in my mouth. The flavor of betrayal coats my tongue. I did the one thing she asked me not to. Delivered it in such a way that I knew it would do the most damage to Mercer. Fuck.
“You need to leave.” Mercer’s voice comes out low, deadly.
I don’t look back at him as I storm to my truck.
I hit the highway at a dangerously fast speed, racing against a clock I know I can’t beat.
I pull up in front of Leni’s cabin, tires spinning so fast that the front porch and the woman standing on it are wrapped in a cloud of dust as I fling open the door.
When the dirt settles, it takes one look into Leni’s eyes to know that I just lost everything.