Chapter Twenty-Three
Saturday morning started early for us. Maisie’s been in my bed all week.
Not having Kara upstairs has changed her comfort level.
Neither of us has slept well. She’s spent most nights tossing and turning, her legs and arms flying into me like a tiny UFC fighter.
I’ve been slapped so many times, I think I’d stand a chance in the ring.
Even with all that going on during the night, it’s still not why I can’t sleep.
Since Kara left, my mind’s been consumed with her. I wonder if she’s sleeping well, if Judy’s giving her good options for dinner, if she’s keeping up with schoolwork, if she misses home. It’s not easy. I miss her.
I miss Sam too. But that part I push down to the compartment in the back of my mind. I have to deal with one heartache at a time. If I allow it, my emotions will consume me, and I have Maisie to think of.
Steven’s been my saving grace. He’s shown up here almost every day after work, providing support and comfort without judgment.
He’s the best of people. I know he’s deeply in love with Luke, yet he’s stepped up for me and Maisie.
He hasn’t questioned my decision, and he hasn’t talked about Sam. I’m thankful for that.
We made the commitment to go through Bill and Annie’s room. Steven’s idea, of course. I probably would have put it off forever. But he’s right. Nothing difficult is ever conquered without taking the first step. When my strength fails, he becomes my backbone.
Even this early in the morning, Steven and Maisie are full of energy while I lack motivation for the day. Grief is heavy. I feel the weight of it. Life goes on, but not always easily.
“I love this.” Maisie giggles as she twirls around with one of her dad’s jackets hanging off her tiny shoulders. “I remember this.”
“I love it too.” I smile. “Let’s keep it.”
Her eyes light up with joy. “Yay!” She proudly places the jacket in the keep pile.
My heart warms as I think of Bill wearing that jacket the night we celebrated their anniversary.
One day, I’ll show her the pictures and tell her all about that night.
How happy her parents were and how deeply they loved her and Kara.
“Look at this.” Steven holds up a locket that belonged to my mother.
When he opens it, my breath catches. Inside are two tiny pictures of Annie and me as little girls.
She’s on the left, smiling with that mischievous grin.
I’m on the right, gap-toothed and shy. We don’t have many photos from our childhood, so finding this is a gift.
I take the locket from him, tracing the miniature images with my thumb. We were so young. I always thought Kara looked like Bill, but in this photo, I see my sister’s face in hers. Tears spring to my eyes as I stare at the only person that made me feel truly loved.
Maisie wraps her little arms around me. “It’s okay, Aunt Allie.”
A smile forms through my tears as I pull her onto my lap. “This is your mom when she was young.” I point to her picture. “She was a little older than you are here. She was so smart and was always making me laugh. She was the best big sister.”
Maisie lifts the picture to her mouth and kisses it. “Mommy was so cute.”
I laugh softly. “She really was.”
“Kara’s a good big sister too,” Maisie adds, glancing up at me.
“She is,” I agree. I squeeze her into a hug and rock her side to side. “I know you miss her. I do, too.”
“Okay!” Steven claps his hands. “What do we want for lunch? I’m starving.” The emotion in the room must be getting to him. He’s a big softy.
“McDonald’s.” Maisie’s eyes widen with excitement.
“Maybe,” I say, tickling her sides. “Can I borrow some money, though?”
Maisie hops off my lap, marches to Steven and rests her little hand on his shoulder. “Uncle Steven,” she says in her most serious voice. “Can Aunt Allie borrow some money? It’s for a good cause.”
Steven bursts out laughing as he pulls out his wallet. “Will five dollars work?”
“Thank you!” Maisie beams, taking the money and sprinting it back to me. “Here, I got it,” she says, so proud of her achievement.
“Guess that’s a start,” I tease. Steven and I laugh as my phone rings. It’s Judy. “Hey,” I answer, still chuckling.
“Allie!” Judy gasps, breathless.
I jump to my feet. “What’s wrong?”
“Kara’s missing.” Her voice is trembling.
“What do you mean?” I walk into the hall so that Maisie doesn’t hear. “She isn’t with you?”
“No.” Judy is clearly distraught. “I went to get her for brunch, and she’s gone. Nowhere to be found. Do you have any idea where she could have gone?”
I feel as if things are moving in slow motion. The world seems to tilt as my pulse pounds in my ears. I brace myself against the wall. “When was the last time you saw her?” I finally manage.
Judy clears her throat. “After dinner last night around eight.”
I struggle to think logically. “Is anything missing from her room?” If she’s running away, I wonder how far she plans to travel. Hopefully not with that boy who’s been hanging around.
“I’m not sure. I haven’t checked thoroughly.”
Steven appears beside me, worry etched across his face. He grips my arm as I continue talking to Judy. “Have you looked for her outside? Around your property and the neighborhood?”
“She’s not here at the house anywhere. And I didn’t know where to go beyond that.” Judy’s voice wavers. “I thought maybe you could give me some insight on her favorite spots.”
I meet Steven’s eyes, my stomach twisting in fear. “I’ll call her best friend, and we’ll start looking. Please contact the police right away. Stay home in case she returns. Let’s keep each other updated.”
“Thank you, Allie,” Judy says, and I can hear the cries of help within her voice. “I can’t believe this is happening.”
“It’s not your fault,” I reassure her, knowing exactly how she feels. “We’ll find her.” I say this for myself as much as for her.
When I hang up, I immediately dial Sam’s number. I speak to Steven as the phone rings. “Please listen as I talk to Sam so I can fill you in.” I hold up a finger as Sam answers.
“Hello?” Sam says warily.
“Sam, has Olivia heard from Kara today? Could you please ask her? It’s important.”
“What’s going on?” I hear her moving as she calls out to Olivia.
Steven quietly closes the bedroom door to keep Maisie from hearing. I know that it won’t last long. Since her parents’ death, Maisie doesn’t like closed doors without someone with her. It makes her panic.
“Kara’s run away from Judy’s. I don’t know where she’d go or who she might be with.” I begin pacing the hall.
“Hold for a second,” Sam says, her voice muffled as she talks to Olivia. “She hasn’t heard from her today. But yesterday at school she told Olivia that she was miserable and didn’t know how much longer she could take it.”
“Does Olivia know the name of the boy Kara’s been seeing?” I ask. “I’m not mad. I just need to know if she’s with him.”
There’s murmuring again, then Sam clearly tells Olivia to speak up, her voice firm. She comes back. “His name’s Drew Freewater. But she said he broke it off with Kara on Wednesday.”
“Can she message him? He’ll be more likely to answer her than me.” I hate to involve them, but I need all the help I can get.
“She’s already texting him.” A pause. “He says he hasn’t talked to her.”
“Okay. If she calls or shows up, please let me know.”
“Of course. But we’re helping look for her. My mom’s here. She can stay while we’re out. Where do you want us to go first?” The shuffling on the phone gets louder as Sam’s breathing picks up. “We are headed to the car now.”
“Ask Olivia where the popular hangouts are and start there. Text me the locations so we don’t double up.” I touch Steven’s arm as I speak. He’s been right beside me the whole time. Pacing and all. “Steven can stay here with Maisie in case she shows up.” He nods in agreement.
After we hang up, I go in search of my shoes. Maisie’s out of the room and curious.
“Where are you going?” she asks as I tie my laces.
“I have to run a quick work errand,” I tell her, trying to keep my tone light. “Uncle Steven is going to stay with you until I get back.”
“I want to go with you.” Her lip quivers.
“But I was hoping we could get lunch,” Steven says, crouching beside her. “Maybe do a puzzle too.”
I squat down in front of her. “Now that sounds more fun than going to the office with me, don’t you think?”
“Okay,” she mumbles, still pouting.
Steven scoops her up, spinning her around until she giggles. “Lunch it is!”
I grab my keys and rush out the door, my pulse hammering. Where the hell do I go first?
* * *
Hours have passed and there is still no sign of Kara.
She hasn’t gone back to Judy’s, nor has she gone home.
I started at Annie and Bill’s gravesite.
Nothing. Sam and Olivia have checked in with their school friends and every hangout they could think of.
I’ve been to the mall and a few other places Olivia suggested.
We’ve covered as much ground as possible in such a short time.
Judy still has Kara’s phone so tracking her isn’t possible.
The thought of her out there alone, without a way to call for help, gnaws at me.
My phone rings. “Hey, Sam,” I answer, sitting in my car, trying to figure out where to go next.
“Hey,” she says softly. Hearing her voice steadies me. “Olivia wants us to check the football field and the skate park. Drew hangs out there, apparently.”
“That’s a good idea. Thank you.”
“I was also thinking,” Sam adds, “have you checked the house we’ve been working on? Maybe she went there. It’s vacant and familiar.”
I buckle in and start the car. “Why didn’t I think of that?”
“Because you’ve got a lot on your mind,” she says gently. “You’re doing your best.”
I sigh as I pull out into traffic. “I wish I could do more.”
“Allie?” Olivia’s voice surprises me through the speaker.
“Yeah, honey?”