Chapter four
Dylan
“Devyn, go inside so I can talk to Dylan,” Caine said.
She shook her head immediately. “No.”
“Devyn.”
“I’m not leaving because this concerns me,” she replied adamantly.
Her voice cracked and my chest tightened all over again.
We had been standing here arguing with Caine for the last several minutes and nothing was changing.
The plane was still leaving next week. She was still going to Switzerland.
And Caine was still standing there acting like he was doing her some huge favor.
“Dylan.” Her fingers wrapped tightly around my wrist. “Please.”
I hated hearing her cry… always had but today felt different. Today felt worse because I couldn’t do or say anything to fix it. I couldn’t stop it. I couldn’t even make her feel better. All I could do was stand there and watch her heart break.
“Dev.” I reached up and wiped a tear from her cheek. “You should go inside.”
Her eyes widened, like she couldn’t believe I had said that. “What?” she asked. “No.”
“You should go inside,” I repeated.
“No, I’m not going anywhere!”
“Yeah, you are.” I forced a small smile… one I didn’t really feel. “I’m good.”
That was a huge lie, but she didn’t need to know that right now. She was hurting enough already.
“I’ll come by to see you tomorrow.”
She stared at me like she was trying to figure out if I meant it. If I could, I’d spend every day of the next week with her… every minute, every hour because once she got on that plane, who knew when I’d see her again?
“You promise?” she asked in a small tone.
The question nearly broke me because she sounded so small and scared. Like a little girl looking for reassurance.
I swallowed hard and nodded my head. “Yeah.”
“Promise me,” she said.
I nodded again reassuringly. “I promise.”
For a moment neither one of us moved. Then she threw her arms around me, hard. Like she was trying to memorize what it felt like. I hugged her back just as tightly, not caring that Caine was still standing right there watching.
And for the first time all day, I had to blink a few times to keep my own emotions in check. Because if I let myself think about next week, I mean really think about it, I was gonna lose it.
Eventually she pulled away and locked eyes on her father. The look she gave him could’ve cut steel easily. Then she rolled her eyes dramatically.
A second later, she turned and headed towards the house. Neither one of us spoke right away. We just watched her go until the stable door closed behind her. Then suddenly, everything felt different… quieter and heavier.
For several moments neither me nor Caine said a word. I kept staring at the stable entrance long after Devyn disappeared. Trying not to think about the fact that in seven days she’d be gone for real. Trying not to think about how empty this place was gonna feel without her.
“You mad at me?”
His voice finally broke the silence.
A short humorless laugh escaped my lips. “What you think?” I asked in a brazen tone.
Caine didn’t respond right away. Instead, he looked towards the doorway in the direction Devyn had gone.
“I think you got a right to be.”
The answer caught me off guard, so I finally looked at him. I couldn’t even lie… the man looked tired. Not his usual powerful and intimidating self, just tired. Unfortunately, it didn’t make me feel any better.
“You ain’t gotta send her away.”
His jaw tightened as he looked me square in the eyes. “Yeah, I do.”
“No, you don’t.”
His eyes met mine. “You don’t understand, Dylan.”
“There you go with that.”
“With what?” Caine asked.
I folded my arms over my chest. “Everybody always says that when they don’t wanna explain the reason behind why they did something.”
His expression remained neutral. “I’m saying it because it’s true. You can’t understand my reasons because you aren’t a parent yet,” he said.
“No disrespect Caine, but that’s a bogus excuse,” I said.
The words left my mouth before I could stop them. But once they were out, I didn’t take them back. I was tired of hearing the same thing over and over.
You don’t understand.
You’re too young.
You’ll understand when you have kids of your own.
That was a load of bullshit and they knew it. If they felt that I didn’t understand, why didn’t they just explain that shit? Make me understand instead of telling me I don’t.
“Explain why she gotta leave,” I stated. “Why did this have to happen now?”
Caine sighed heavily. “Dylan…”
“Nah, I need some answers sir.” I shook my head. “Because right now, none of this makes any sense.”
His eyes narrowed slightly. “Maybe it doesn’t to you.”
“To anybody,” I corrected. “Devyn doesn’t understand it either.”
The stables fell silent. I could tell that he was choosing his words carefully. Trying not to say the wrong thing or make the situation worse. Unfortunately, I already knew the answer or at least I thought I did.
“This is about me, ain’t it?” I asked.
The silence that followed told me everything I needed to know. My stomach immediately dropped because even though he didn’t say the words, his silence said it all.
I laughed again. This time there wasn’t a trace of humor in it. “That’s what I thought.”
“Dylan.”
“Nah,” I said as I pointed towards the mansion. “I’m good enough to work for you though.” His jaw flexed and he looked like he wanted to say something, but I didn’t give him a chance. “And I’m good enough to learn from Rico.”
“Dylan…”
“I’m good enough to be around you and your people every day.”
The hurt I had been holding back ever since Devyn told me she had to leave finally started slipping out.
“But I’m not good enough for your daughter to be friends with.” He stayed quiet, which only made it worse.
For the first time since the conversation started, Caine looked uncomfortable because he knew exactly why I felt that way.
Finally, he exhaled slowly. “I like you, Dylan.”
I frowned thinking I heard him wrong. Surely, he didn’t say he liked me because if he did, he wouldn’t be shipping Devyn all across the world.
“What?” I asked with a surprised expression.
“I said I like you.” I looked at him like he was lying but he held my gaze. “I really do.”
Something about that made my chest hurt. I mean, if he hated me, this would make more sense. If he thought I was worthless, then I could understand, but he didn’t. And that made everything worse.
“Then why?”
The question came out quieter than I intended. For the first time all day, my voice cracked… just a little but it was enough.
“Why ain’t I good enough?”
For several seconds Caine didn’t answer. When he finally did, his voice was calm, honest, and brutal.
“Because the future I have planned for my daughter doesn’t include you,” he said.
The words hit me harder than any punch ever could. And standing there in the stables, staring at the man I had looked up to for almost a year, I realized I’d never forget them… ever.
“Do you even care why I like Devyn so much?” I asked.
Since he remained quiet, I continued. “Devyn never judged me. She accepted me for who I have been since day one. She’s never tried to change me or mold me into someone I wasn’t.
When I told her I couldn’t read and write that good, she helped me get better.
She cares about me without wanting a damn thing in return. ”
By that time, I was on the verge of tears, so I quit talking. It wasn’t like it would change anything. She was still leaving next week.
Without another word, I headed towards
my scooter because I didn’t trust myself to speak or to stay in his presence. If I stayed any longer, I might say something I’d regret.
A few seconds later I threw my leg over the scooter and the engine roared to life.
“Dylan.”
I froze. For a moment I considered ignoring him. Instead, I looked over my shoulder. Caine stood in the stable doorway…his expression unreadable.
“I won’t stop you from spending time with Devyn before she leaves.”
I didn’t respond.
“I mean that.”
I still said nothing because what would be the point?
Then he sighed. “But once she’s gone…” My stomach immediately tightened. “…I hope you’ll allow her to focus on school.”
The hurt returned instantly… stronger this time.
“And making friends in Switzerland.”
For several seconds I just stared at him because I knew he couldn’t be serious. Surely after everything we had just talked about, he couldn’t expect me to simply disappear from her life like Devyn didn’t matter.
Like she was somebody I could forget.
Slowly, I shook my head. “I can’t promise you that.”
His jaw tightened.
“Dylan.”
“No! I won’t promise that!”
My voice cracked a little, but it was enough. Because suddenly every emotion I had been trying to hold back all evening came rushing to the surface including anger, confusion, and heartbreak.
“You don’t understand.”
His eyes narrowed. “Then help me understand.”
A bitter laugh escaped me. “Devyn means the world to me.”
The words slipped out before I could stop them… raw, honest and painfully true.
I swallowed hard and continued, “I feel like you just ripped a piece of my heart out with that news.”
For the first time since the conversation started, Caine didn’t have an answer, any kind of advice or a damn speech. He had nothing as he just looked at me. I looked away, started my scooter and left.
When I got home, the apartment was quiet. I went to the bathroom to shower then came back and lay on the sofa staring at the ceiling. Then my phone lit up…
Devyn??
And immediately my heart started racing.
Devyn ??: Are you mad at me?
Me: Never
From there we just spent the rest of the night texting. It wasn’t flirtatious or us making promises we’d never get to keep. We were actually just talking like we had lost our best.
We kept trying to figure out how this could have happened.
Devyn ??: I’m scared
Me: Me too
Devyn ??: What if you forget about me?
Me: That ain’t ever gonna happen.
Devyn: You promise?
Me: Promise
And the heartbreaking thing was I meant every single word. The last text between us came a little after midnight.
Goodnight, Dylan ??I love you
I stared at the screen for several seconds while trying to keep my emotions in check. After a few minutes, I typed back.
Goodnight, Dev ?? I love you too
A minute later her read receipt appeared. Neither of us sent another message after that, but I still slept with my phone beside me.
Because for the first time in years, I was terrified of waking up and finding out she was gone.