Chapter Fifteen
Owen
“Hey, Owen, have you got a second?” Alfie asked as he ducked into the kitchen, a bright smile on his face. From behind him, I could hear the loud hum of busy chatter and laughter from the shop where everyone and their nan seemed to be out for ice cream before the summer holidays finally ended.
“Sure, what’s up?” I asked, putting down the knife I’d been using to chop some sponge fingers for another batch of tiramisu. It’d been super popular in the last couple of days since we’d launched it, and it was amazing to see people so excited about it.
“Nothing. You’ve just got visitors. Although they said if you’re busy then not to worry about it.”
I grinned because I knew exactly who it was. “You’re all right, I’ll come through.”
Following him out, I saw my dad waiting with my brother, Matthew, and my two nibs.
The youngest, Maggie, was asleep in her pram, but Lando, who was two-and-a-half, was swinging on my brother’s arm and giggling wildly.
He wasn’t wearing shoes and was covered in sand, which was about right for Lando.
I was more surprised my brother had convinced him to put clothes on.
“Ey up,” Dad said, shooting me a broad smile. “Thought we’d come and surprise you.”
“I have no idea who you are,” I said with a laugh as I ducked around the counter. “Especially not this one.” I winked at my brother as Lando threw himself at my legs.
“Nice to see you too,” Matthew said. He was two years younger than me and two inches taller, something he’d always loved reminding me of when we were teenagers and he’d had his first growth spurt at fifteen.
He’d always been a solid, steady person—both physically and in temperament.
It didn’t surprise me he’d stayed in Heather Bay, deepening his roots until they were as solid as an ancient oak.
Our different approaches to life had frustrated the pair of us for years, both of us wishing the other would change.
But recently, that had eased. I didn’t know if it was because of Dad, or if having two kids under three had finally exhausted Matthew enough to give up nagging, but we’d been getting on a lot better since I got back.
“What’ve you lot been up to today?” I asked, putting my hand out to spin Lando out of the way of a couple of customers.
The shop was getting busier and there wasn’t really a lot of room for us to stand and chat without getting in everyone’s way.
Outside didn’t look much quieter either.
It was difficult to see from where I was stood, but it looked like all the colourful chairs and tables we put out every morning were full.
“Been down to the beach,” Dad said. “Lando and I went paddling, then we built a sandcastle.”
“Sandcastle!” Lando said with a giggle. “Then we squashed it!”
“Playing Godzilla then?” I asked.
“Something like that,” Matthew said, gently rocking the pram as Maggie stirred.
“We won’t keep you. Just wanted to pop in and say hi,” Dad said.
“And get ice cream,” Lando said as he tried to spin around me only to get casually wrangled by Matthew, who seemed to have more arms than an octopus. It was impressive. And reminded me I’d never have the patience to be a parent.
I’d happily keep on being the irresponsible uncle who popped up once or twice a year with new tattoos and trinkets from his travels.
And maybe… a beautiful man by his side.
“You should meet Darcy before you go,” I said, craning my neck to see if I could see into the kitchen from here. I couldn’t. But I suddenly had the urge to introduce him to everyone, and I didn’t want them to leave without knowing the amazing man behind this place.
“Oh, we don’t want to be a nuisance,” Dad said with a wave of his hand.
“It’s fine, hang on. And your ice cream is on me, I’ll tell Alfie.” I walked back towards the kitchen before either of them could object, letting Alfie know what I’d said so he could charge me later. Even though he’d probably tell me it was fine and on the house, because he was sweet like that.
I stuck my head around the kitchen door to see Darcy shutting the door of the freezer. “Darcy, can I borrow you?”
“Yeah, sure. Everything okay?” he asked as he adjusted the bottom of his apron.
“Yeah, my family is here and I want them to meet you,” I said. He looked shocked for a second and I suddenly realised what that might sound like. But before I could add anything, he’d schooled his face into a polite smile, putting on the public persona I’d seen every time he dealt with customers.
I wanted to say something, but I didn’t know what.
There were too many options and none at the same time.
It didn’t help that I had no fucking clue what I was feeling.
Things had changed so much but neither of us had said anything about it.
I doubted Darcy had even admitted it to himself. I definitely hadn’t.
Not really.
All I could do was smile and lead Darcy into the shop, walking ahead of him without reaching back for his hand. My fingers itched and I balled my hand into a loose fist.
“Dad, Matthew, this is Darcy, who’s the awesome genius behind Lick It!
,” I said as we approached them, trying to keep smiling despite the fact my insides were squirming weirdly.
“Darcy, this my dad, and my brother, Matthew. The little chaos demon is Lando, and then we’ve got Maggie. Who’s asleep for once.”
“Don’t jinx it,” Matthew said, shooting me a withering look like I’d just cursed him. And sure enough, Maggie started to squeak and grumble.
Shit. Now I’d done it.
“It’s lovely to meet you,” Darcy said as he reached out to shake my dad’s hand. “Owen’s told me a lot about you.”
“Oh aye? Getting me in trouble no doubt?” Dad asked, chuckling as he winked at Darcy. “Probably told yer I’m making him tear his hair out because I won’t sit still.”
“You won’t! That’s not lying.”
“Nowt wrong with me going for a walk, is there?”
“You don’t just go for a walk,” I said. “Getting hold of a wheelbarrow full of compost and taking it around the garden isn’t a walk!”
“I were walkin’ while doing it.” Dad shrugged. “And I didn’t have me stick. Barrow was the next best thing.”
“You see what I’m dealing with,” I said to Darcy, whose perfect smile had melted into something much more relaxed, his eyes twinkling with amusement.
“I’m fine. You two worry too much,” Dad said as he looked between me and Matthew, who seemed unwilling to get involved, especially as he had his hands full with a grumbling Maggie and screeching Lando.
Or maybe he just didn’t want to have this argument again, which was fair enough because it’d happened a lot.
I knew Dad was on the mend, but he seemed to think he was back to business as usual, and I spent half my time trying to convince him that wasn’t how it worked.
Just because he felt better didn’t mean he should be throwing himself back into things, because there was a good chance he’d undo his recovery and we’d be back to square one.
“You should come round for tea one night,” Dad continued, giving Darcy a warm smile. “Come back with Owen one day next week.”
“Oh, er…” Darcy’s expression was one of poorly disguised panic and I went to step in.
“Dad, Darcy is very busy.”
“Exactly, be nice for him not to have to cook,” Dad said firmly. “Owen doesn’t exactly have many friends with him gallivanting off round the world so often.”
I grimaced, feeling like a child all over again. What was it about parents and their ability to make you feel no more than eight with only one sentence? I was thirty-four, I didn’t need him trying to help me make friends. Or scaring away the ones I had.
“That’d be lovely,” Darcy said. “Maybe next Wednesday? It’s usually one of our quieter days.”
“Lovely, we’ll see you then.” Dad nodded, looking very pleased with the outcome. “Now, we won’t keep you. We’ll get some ice cream and be out your hair. Nice t’ meet you, Darcy, and I’ll see you later, Owen. Tarra.”
“See you,” I said, smiling weakly as they joined the queue. I wished I’d told Dad to pack it in, or at least asked Matthew to intervene. Although I doubted that would have gone down well since I’d apparently cursed him.
I’d make it up to him at some point by offering to babysit one evening. But first, I had other fuckups to deal with.
“I’m so sorry,” I added as I followed Darcy back to the kitchen, hoping I hadn’t totally fucked things up between us.
Getting parents involved usually meant things were serious…
but how could things be serious between us when we didn’t even know what this was?
All I’d wanted was to make Darcy happy and now it seemed like I was making everything worse.
I was getting so in my own head and I didn’t know how to untangle things.
“I didn’t know Dad was going to do that. ”
“It’s fine,” Darcy said, not looking at me as he walked over to the dishwasher to slide the full tray out and put another one in.
“I can make an excuse for you.”
“It’s fine, honestly.”
“Are you sure? Because it doesn’t sound fine.”
Darcy sighed. “I guess it threw me a bit. But that’s on me. I guess… I don’t know.”
“Tell me, angel. Please.” I closed the gap between us, not touching him but standing close enough I could see all the details of his face.
“It just feels confusing.” He picked up a bowl, turning it around slowly in his hands.
“We’re friends and we fuck and we hang out all the time, and I guess…
I’m not sure where we stand. But also, I don’t want things to change.
I want…” He trailed off and shook his head. “Ignore me, I’m just wittering.”
“Nothing is going to change,” I said. “It’s only dinner.”
I was reassuring myself as much as him, because I didn’t want anything to change.
I knew it was going to at some point, and that’d happen sooner than we wanted because the end of summer was coming.
But until then, I was going to bury my head in the sand and pretend this bubble was never going to burst.
Because then I didn’t have to figure out what I wanted to do with my life.
And I didn’t have to confront all the pain from my past and my fears for the future.
There was a gnawing feeling in my gut telling me things were different, that I’d changed and so had my dreams, but I didn’t want to listen to it. Not yet. I’d had a plan for my life, and nothing had ever altered it.
But now…
Darcy nodded, a tiny smile pulling at the corner of his mouth. “I know, and I’m sure it’ll be fun. I can’t wait to ask your dad all about you as a kid. Do you think he’ll dig pictures out to show me?”
“He might,” I said. “There’ll probably be at least one of me in a wheelbarrow.”
Darcy laughed softly. “I can’t wait to see that.”
The tension that had been building eased, and I picked up a couple of clean containers and went to put them back on the shelves as I started telling Darcy some random story from my childhood.
Both of us seemed pleased the moment had passed, but as happy as I was to move on and forget about what Darcy had said about where we stood, there was still an uncomfortable feeling in my gut.
Because we could only put that conversation off for so long, and those days were numbered.
At some point, we’d have to talk about how we felt and what we wanted.
My only hope was I’d have figured it out by then.