Chapter 19
A Group Gathering with Shots
Brushing away a stray piece of auburn hair that fell straight onto my face when I opened the door, I try my very hardest to collect myself.
Although, it’s not working very well so far.
The alcohol is causing my vision to sway and I feel like I’m standing on the surface of the sun.
Maybe if I focus really hard, I won’t look like I feel.
Miles looks a little disheveled too. I step back and take him in.
Sexy gray sweatpants cling to his hips, shoved awkwardly into a pair of dusty cowboy boots.
It’s an effort not to look at his ass. He looks like he threw on the closest wrinkled black t-shirt he could find.
His hair is mussed, like he rolled out of bed and ran his hands through it a couple of times.
His lips are moving and I realize I haven’t been listening at all. “What?” I say, squinting at him as if it’ll help me think better.
“Jesus Christ,” he sighs, rubbing his temple with his hands. “I said, are you okay? I saw a big flash of light coming from the cabin, so I came running over here as fast as I could. I thought someone was breaking in and setting it on fire or something.”
Flash of light? “I’m not sure what you saw, but we are all fine here,” I say, suddenly remembering there are other people here. Other people like his best friend. Maybe he won’t notice?
“We?” Busted.
“Yeah, I’m halfway done with the construction thingies so I invited my brand new friends over to celebrate so that’s what we are doing. And you can’t be mad at me because it’s my cabin. I bought it. It’s not yours.” I hear my words slurring but I can’t stop them from tumbling out of my mouth.
“Who’s at the door?” Parker yells from the living room. I ignore him, keeping my eyes on Miles and a tight smile on my lips.
“Oh yeah, and Codie found Parker on the streets and brought him too. They brought Tequila and card games,” I say.
Miles’s face falls as he looks down at the ground. For a second there, he almost looks sad. But as soon as his gaze lifts back to mine, there’s only anger there.
“Mac, are you drunk?” He asks.
“No.”
“Yes, you are.”
“No, I’m not.”
“I can tell that you are.”
“Are you drunk, Autry?”
“No I’m not–” Miles sighs, hands on his hips. “Nevermind. I was just coming over to make sure no one was setting the cabin on fire. I’ll let you get back to your little drinking party with Parker.”
That’s all it takes to set me off. “Excuse me? It’s not a party, I’m not eighteen years old.
And it’s not just with Parker, he just came later on because one of my friends has a crush on him, not me by the way.
I told you it was with my friends, but Erin brought her boyfriend so now there’s five of us.
Five people isn’t a party, it’s a group gathering. With shots.”
I know I’m not making any sense, but now I’m too pissed off to care. Who does this guy think he is, waltzing over to my fun night to crash it and judge me?
“Fine, I’ll let you get back to your group gathering with shots. My mistake,” Miles’s tone hardens with each word. What reason does he have to be mad at me?
“Yeah, it is your mistake. You can’t just come over here and ruin my night with your judgment and your ass-hugging sweatpants. The whole point of this was so I didn’t have to think about you any more and now you’re here, in real life. Cowboys aren’t even my type. It’s not fair.”
Oh crap, did I say that outloud? Maybe he didn’t hear me.
“What?” Miles freezes with his arms crossed. He definitely heard.
“Nothing. I didn’t say anything,” I deadpan.
Miles and I face off in the doorway, neither of us uttering a word. But it feels like an entire conversation passes between our gazes. I can feel the heat radiating off of him. Or maybe it’s coming from me.
I’ve always been pulled to him like a magnet. A moth to the flame. I can feel it as I stand here right in front of him. A pull so strong I have to physically resist taking him in my arms. It’s a bad idea. We have a history, and even though it’s been better lately, I know he’s not my biggest fan.
There are some other reasons too, but I’m having a hard time remembering them right now.
“You know, I remember when you were all smiley and kind and funny. What happened to that Miles?” I take another step closer to him until we are almost touching.
“That was a long time ago.” Butterflies flutter in my stomach at the low rasp of his voice.
“Not that long ago,” I counter. I reach up and run my fingers through his hair, unable to hold back any longer. I’m not sober enough to stop myself around him.
Miles sighs and leans just slightly into my touch. “Katie…” he starts, closing his eyes.
“Yeah?” I breathe. He doesn’t respond. Words fall out of my mouth like a firehose, filling the heavy silence.
“You’re just so tiring. I just want you to like me back.
We could be really good friends, or we could be friends that kiss a little.
I think I’d prefer that. You’re a really good kisser.
The best probably. But you’re always mad at me, and it’s not fair.
” The alcohol rushes straight to my head as I lean onto him, wrapping my arms around his neck. “Don’t you want to kiss me?”
His fingertips brush against the waistband of my jean shorts at my hips so lightly I barely feel it, causing goosebumps to pop up all over me. His eyes look so different close up. Lighter, almost. I can pick out a few gold specks I could never see from afar.
His expression wholly darkens as he looks at me. Having his full attention on me is intimidating, but I love it. It’s like a drug. His gaze drops to my lips, and I instinctively brush my tongue across my bottom lip. He tracks the movement, throat bobbing as his eyes dart back up to mine.
I’m sure my entire face is flushed. It doesn’t take much. But I can’t find it in me to be embarrassed about it. I want him to know how he makes me feel.
“You’re drunk,” he whispers. The heat in his gaze diminishes, like a coal turning to ash. “You should go back inside.”
“I don’t want to go back inside. I’m fine right here,” I say, taking another step closer so we are chest to chest. My skin ignites at the contact, but now that he’s here the heat isn’t uncomfortable. It’s addicting.
“I’m not having this conversation with you when you’ve been drinking tequila like it’s water. You need to sober up.”
The air leaves my lungs. His scolding tone is like a bucket of ice water dumped all over me. I step back, creating as much distance between us as I can. This was a mistake. I never should have opened the door in the first place. He doesn’t want me.
“Don’t tell me what I need to do, Miles. I work hard, I deserve to have fun every once in a while. You’re the one who crashed this anyway. If you don’t want to be here, just go,” I snap.
“Katie, wait, that’s not what I–” Miles starts, but it’s too late, I’m already back inside the cabin with a hand on the door.
“Just stop, okay? I get it,” I interrupt.
“Katie, who’s at the door?” Morgan hollers from the living room.
“It’s Miles,” I holler back. “Don’t worry, he was just leaving, he doesn’t want to hang around. He hates me.” The words feel poisonous as they roll off my lips, but I don’t take them back. Miles rears back a step as if I’ve hit him.
“Miles, hey man,” Parker shows up at my side, leaning into the door frame. “Want us to deal you in?” He nods towards the living room.
“No, Mac is right. I was just leaving,” Miles says, voice rough. He never takes his eyes off of mine, not even a sideways glance at Parker. He turns around and walks back down the driveway, leaving me standing at the door frozen in place.
I watch until he’s back in his truck, tail lights disappearing into the black night.