10. Ben #2
“I have to say, if I didn’t know better, I’d say you could see.” Cindy’s voice was still bright and warm, like it was the greatest compliment.
I could almost hear Rian grind his teeth. “And how should a blind person act?”
“I’m sorry.” Cindy sounded genuinely sorry. “I was trying to be complimentary, but I can see how that’s not…polite.”
An awkward pause. I tapped Rian’s hand, still at my three o’clock.
“It’s okay, Rian,” I said. “Visually impaired people are given extensive training on orientation and mobility.”
“I wasn’t trying to be rude,” Cindy said again, silverware clicking on her plate.
“It’s really okay.”
I was used to sighted people expecting me to grope around to find things. When I asked Rian about signing up for Cosmic Bonds, I knew we would have some basic conversations about my blindness, and I didn’t see it as too much different than talking about our personal preferences in a partner.
For example, Rian wouldn’t be able to stand a long-term relationship with someone who never picked up after themselves. We’d dated an alpha woman who was a total slob, and it only took three dates in for us all to realize it was a deal-breaker.
I didn’t see this as being too different from the normal getting-to-know-you conversation.
“The orientation and mobility training, or O I just didn’t express them until I was further along in the relationship.
“I think it’s amazing, how you’re living your life without letting your disability define you.”
Some of my determination to take Cindy’s questions at face value slipped, and I almost snarked back that other people did that just fine.
In the end I settled for the answer I gave to get the person off the subject. “I’m just living my life, right? Don’t actually have a choice. Besides, people live with disabilities all the time. You find a way.”
Rian huffed. “Can we talk about something else? That isn’t about how amazing it is that Ben knows how to use a fork like a big boy?”
“Sure, sorry.” Cindy sounded wounded. “I was just curious, but of course.”
The night was stilted after that. I was drained, and I couldn’t decide if we should have a second date to see if things would get better or not. It went about as I expected, but it could have been better.
We said polite goodbyes and stood up together. I got my cane, extended it, and shifted behind Rian. He put my left hand on his elbow, and we exited the restaurant. As we moved, I heard the slight pauses in conversation that meant people were watching us leave.
Cindy said goodbye one more time and left in the opposite direction. Rian went to the right, where the street leading to the parking garage was located.
The sound of cars on the street was loud, and the slight wind was softer this close to the buildings.
The pavement changed from squares on the sidewalk to smooth asphalt, and sound echoed as we entered the parking garage. I mentally counted rows until we reached the car.
“Sure you don’t want me to drive?” I asked, reaching out for the keys.
“Not tonight,” he said halfheartedly.
I climbed in and felt the lurch as the car pulled away.
“She was awful. Like you were a sideshow monkey.” Rian growled, his smoky oak and amber scent filling the car. The amber had a bitter note to it.
“It could have been worse.” I patted his arm. “She didn’t ask how I knew when to stop wiping my butt.”
Rian laughed. “She probably didn’t get a chance to before I shut her down.”
I relaxed, trusting Rian to get us back home in one piece. It was definitely going to be a head-straight-to-the-nest sort of night.
“We’ll go back to Cosmic Bonds tomorrow,” Rian said like he’d come to a decision. “We’ll tell Ember to screen the ableist idiots out of our profiles.”
I snorted. “That would be a real magic trick. Seriously, I’m fine with questions. We expected it.”
“Yes, but not as the entire topic of conversation.” Rian grumbled. “We changed the subject twice and you gave her a few outs to ask about music.”
“All right.”
Going back to Cosmic Bonds meant seeing Ember again, and I was definitely not against that.
Judging by the satisfaction in Rian’s voice, he didn’t mind so much either.
Suddenly the week was looking up.