16. Electric Fires
16
ELECTRIC FIRES
JADE
“ I can help you learn to control your electric powers,” Osen offers. “Calder could help too since he has fire affinity that I assume would be similar.”
“I’d like to work on this without the pressure of an audience,” I announce. As the crowd disperses, I hurry over to Calder. “Would you help me?”
He looks over my shoulder at the other guys, then back at me in confusion. “You want me?”
“If you want me to find someone else, I get it.” I wave my hand, erasing the request. “Osen said your experience with fire magic might be helpful.”
Calder uses his fingers to comb back his auburn hair, and I watch his arm muscles flex with the simple movement.
“Uh, I…” he pauses and waits for everyone to leave the area.
I wait patiently for him to tell me what he needs to get off his chest. Either he wants to help, or he doesn’t. I will not force him.
“It’s just… I haven’t been able to work with fire magic since my last death.”
“Oh.” I cover my mouth, feeling regret for bringing it up. “I wouldn’t have asked. I didn’t know…”
“I don’t think Osen or the guys have figured it out yet.” He nods behind him, where his now hidden wings would be. “My wings light up. I guess they didn’t think much about it.”
“Is your magic gone forever?” I ask, then grimace. I probably shouldn’t ask that sort of thing. “Sorry, ignore me.”
Calder fiddles with his fingers. “No. It’s okay. You can ask me anything. Weirdly, I don’t feel defensive talking about it with you. I suppose I thought the guys would think less of me.”
“How could they? You’re a freaking amazing phoenix!” I say with enthusiasm.
His mouth turns up at the corners, and he lets a gorgeous smile out on his handsome face. “Thanks. This is what I mean. You’re so new to all this, you’re excited by the little things.”
“You’re definitely not little.” I chuckle when I hear the innuendo. “But yeah, I try to be excited by life—even the mundane—which you, being a mythological creature, are not. Take the compliment, brat.”
He smirks at my sass. “I suppose I can guide you through some things to get you going. I don’t currently need magic to talk about it.”
“And maybe you just have the yips.”
Calder jerks his head in confusion. “Yips?”
“It’s a human sports thing. Usually, it’s thought of as a state of nervous tension affecting an athlete, making them freeze or spasm. They get all up in their heads and have performance anxiety.”
He glances down at his crotch.
“It sounds like you went through a horrible experience. I’d be surprised if you didn’t have some blocks from something like that.”
He stares at me for a long time. I wonder if he’s pissed and is trying to compose himself.
“I suppose it might be that. I lose part of myself when I die, and the last one was a particularly traumatic death.”
I want to hug him and tell him it’s all going to be alright. Fortunately, I remember myself before I leap at him and encroach on his boundaries.
Calder surveys the area and flicks his chin toward the hothouse. “Let’s get away from prying eyes and go where it’s a bit more private. You don’t need the extra pressure to cause the yipping.”
I grin to myself as we walk to our destination, loving how he’s making sure I feel comfortable.
When we’re in what looks like a more private location, I stop and stare at the small building.
Calder’s powerful presence slides up behind me. It’s closer than I expect him to be. I feel the heat from his beautiful body.
His hands cup my shoulders, and he leans down to whisper over the shell of my ear, “You can do this.”
Goddess, how I want to press back into his muscular chest and feel his arms wrap around me. At this point, I’d settle for a friendly hug, just so he can get over his aversion to touch.
I wonder why I have such a draw to them, including Calder, other than the obvious. I’ve seen a lot of gorgeous guys in my life, but none has made me ache with the need to make them mine.
“You’re still denying this? They’re your fated mate matches,” Osen says wistfully.
“ I suppose I thought it only happens in books.” Then I ask him in my mind. “But what about what you had with him?”
“Yes, I believe Calder and I were a mate match, but it seems you’re matched with the entire pack.”
“Well, that’s not heavy or anything. ” I had thought maybe the gravitational pull between us might have been a bit of Osen’s influence. But what if it isn’t?
“First thing to do is to relax.” Calder brings me back to the moment. “I watched you earlier and your instincts are good. You rooted your feet in the earth with the intention of grounding yourself. I would suggest that before you call upon your power that you visualize what your goal is.” He points over my shoulder at the weathervane, staying close. “Do you want to throw a ball? Or a lightning bolt? What does it look like in your head?”
“Yeah, okay. I understand.” I suck in a breath and shake out my hands. Instead of holding my palms facing each other like Amira prompted, I lift them up toward the building’s lightning rod. Then I call on my magic. I’m paying more attention since I don’t feel like I’m performing for a crowd.
The magic doesn’t flow until I think about how I could use it to protect my pack from Galiana and Rob. It must be triggered by the need to keep them safe.
Energy seems to gather from inside me and then draws from outside of my body.
“Very good,” Calder encourages. “I can feel it. Keep going.”
Excited that I’m a flipping mage and I’m doing this, I open myself even more to the magic.
My hair is rising on my arms and head.
Maybe too much? Shit .
I throw the energy like I did in hell, and it streaks out of me like Zeus’ bolt, fully formed.
It crashes against the lightning rod and obliterates it.
Metal explodes out.
Calder grabs me, spinning. He protectively expands and curls his wings to shield us. I can feel his feathers slide across my arms.
Glowing scrap metal lands all around us, sizzling in the grass.
Calder jerks as though he’s been hit with debris.
Then I realize his wings are on fire. I expect them to burn me, so I recoil. But other than heat, I don’t feel like I’m being hurt.
“Calder! Are you okay?” I ask.
“Fine,” he grunts and yanks his wings away from me. “ Fuck , Jade, did I burn you?”
I touch my arms and hair, then I turn for him and pat my sides. “I don’t think so.”
“How?” He keeps inspecting me for damage. “I swore my wings touched you, didn’t they?”
“Maybe?”
He looks disturbed by that revelation.
“What the fuck?” Darius barks as he charges out of his house, staring at the scattered lightning rod pieces smoldering in his yard. “Woman, you owe me a new rod!”
Protectively, Calder moves in front of me and growls, “Back off, hellhound.”
I peek around the phoenix to see that we’ve gathered a crowd again.
Amira waves her hand and mumbles a chant and the flames on the grass are snuffed. “You told her she could use it as a target.”
“I didn’t think she had that much juice.” Darius shakes his head, studying the damage. “You better use that power to fight our enemies.”
“I will.”
He gives me a once over. “Not bad.” With an approving grin, he spins and disappears back into the house as he takes Amira’s hand in his.
My jaw drops in shock. I didn’t know he could smile.
Calder turns and gazes into my eyes. He smooths back my hair as the guys approach to check on me. “She wasn’t burned by my flame,” he says. “Does that mean…”
“We don’t know what it means. Your flames probably didn’t touch her,” Maxum cuts him off and grunts. He glares at me, probably reading the look in my eyes. “Witch, I’m not going to test to see if you’re flame proof.”
“It could be a small test… and you can heal me, right?” I offer. I should know this for any potential battles, shouldn’t I?
“Absolutely not!” Maxum slashes his hand through the air. “I will not hurt you!” He waves his fist at the others. “And none of you fucking try it!” He storms off before anyone can argue with him.
This feels like more than just seeing if I will get a tiny burn.
I want to ask what it could be, but I understand if something is bothering Maxum, I have to talk to him about it alone.
Calder clears his throat to draw my attention away from Maxum's retreating backside. “Jade? Are you sure I didn’t hurt you?”
I check myself again, but don’t even see singe marks on my clothing. “I’m good.”
“Guys?” Calder looks to Arran and Flint. “Can we have a minute?”
My mates give me a quick kiss to reassure themselves I’m okay before they leave me alone with the phoenix.
I stare up at him, curious to hear what he has to say. He appears nervous and sad while he studies my face, like he’s trying to remember what he wanted to say.
When he doesn’t speak for at least a minute, I say, “If you’re worried about me, I’m okay. I’m fully aware I might get hurt playing with my magic. This isn’t your fault.”
“Well, it is. I was supposed to be teaching you control.”
“And that doesn’t happen the first try.” I shrug, then tilt my head, attempting to read him. “What’s really upsetting you?”
Calder drops to his knees in front of me, staring up at me with a pained expression. Surprisingly, he takes hold of my hands. I will myself to remain calm. Whatever this is, I need to let him process it.
“I’m so sorry,” he pleads.
I can’t stand to see him so torn up, so I drop to my knees to meet him where he is. “I don’t understand.”
“I’ve been such an ass?—”
“You haven’t been lately,” I interrupt. “And I know why you were before.”
“But I’m so fucking broken.”
“I’m not asking anything from you.” As I say the words, they feel like acid on my tongue and the pain of rejection stings my eyes. I want him more than I should.
“I curse the Fates,” he mutters and turns his head away. “But maybe this isn’t that…”
“Huh?” I lean over to catch his attention. I don’t understand his erratic emotions. “Can you explain?”
“It might be nothing. Or perhaps my flames aren’t the same since my death. But if my fire touched you and left you completely unscathed, it means we could be mates.”
“Told you,” Osen whispers in my mind.
“Not now,” I scold, then refocus on Calder. I’m unsure of what to say to make him feel better. I struggle with every response I come up with, since I don’t want to make his suffering worse. “I’m sorry.”
That snaps him out of his torment. “Why are you sorry?” he asks softly.
“I’m sorry it upsets you this much that you might be matched to me.”
His brow furrows. “It has nothing to do with it being you. Not like that. I wish I wasn’t broken, and I could be a mate you deserve. You’re everything I’d want in a woman.”
I smile gently. “I will accept whatever affectionate companionship you’re willing to offer. Even if it’s only friendship.” I glance down at our clasped hands. “If this is as far as you can take things with me, I understand.”
Calder’s glacial blue eyes pierce my soul and flame with heat. He lets go of my hand and grasps the back of my head and pulls me in for a bruising kiss.
I surrender to his passion and find I’m swept up in it. I return his kiss, swiping my tongue over his lush lips, and he draws it in to suck.
We are in a frenzy until we finally gasp for air.
He rests his forehead on mine and sighs. “Fucking hell.”
“Good fucking hell?” I ask, biting my lip and gazing at his handsome face.
“Fantastic.” He nuzzles my nose. “Jade, I don’t know how this is going to work. But I will try to manage my damage. I’ll do what I should have done for my other mate and failed.”
I know he’s speaking about Osen. My heart aches for them. I wish I could just write some better ending for them.
Then I wonder…
Maybe I can.