Chapter Twenty-six
Twenty-six
I woke up in my makeshift double bed, but there was no Leo.
My frilly knickers and matching bra were still pristine and even my false eyelashes had stayed in position.
I couldn’t have been more ready for a good send-off; I’d had everything I needed – except for Leo himself.
I reached for my phone, and it was still black and blank.
What the hell was going on with it? I took a closer look and realised I hadn’t switched it on at the socket.
User error. I plugged it into the battery pack instead and waited for it to boot up.
It must be morning by now… it felt like morning.
I pulled up the black-out blinds and it was light outside, so I threw on my dressing gown and tiptoed to the door to see if people were bustling about. It was docking day after all.
No one. It must be earlier than I thought.
Unless there’d been some mass exodus and I’d been left alone on the ship.
I felt suddenly panicked, with no Leo and no proof of life anywhere.
I needed to find some other humans, so I threw a dress on, grabbed my phone as soon as it had a sliver of charge and wandered down the corridor in my slippers.
The crew were buzzing around as usual, so there hadn’t been an apocalypse.
We hadn’t been captured by pirates or zombies.
Phew. It was just too early for most people to be awake: quarter to six according to the restaurant clock.
I’d walked around the boat in a loop and stopped when I realised I was just down the corridor from Brooke’s suite and her door was opening.
What was she doing up? What was I doing up?
I didn’t want her to see me lurking around in my slippers, so I hid behind a large urn to let whoever it was pass.
I waited a few minutes and nobody walked past, so I peeked out and spotted a figure walking the other way.
I watched from a distance as a dishevelled Leo sauntered off down the corridor, his hair mussed, shirt crinkled, and his suit jacket slung over one shoulder.
The same jacket he’d worn in the bar last night.
I couldn’t believe my eyes. Not only had he left me alone and wanting when he’d promised he was on his way, he’d slept in Brooke’s suite.
After his big speech about honesty and trust, he’d almost fooled me into thinking he was one of the good guys.
How could he? This was so much worse than being ghosted; I’d rather have had my usual three-month fob-off than catch actual feelings and be cheated on.
That was something that never happened. I was shocked and humiliated and devastated all at once.
I tried to swallow my feelings, but it hurt.
For the first time in I couldn’t remember how long, I’d left my heart slightly ajar and it had taken a direct hit.
Well, it was time to close it up again. I watched him stop mid-stride and pull out his phone, swiping and tapping as I loitered behind a water butt.
Then my pocket vibrated as the battery came back to life.
Leo: I might not make it to your room tonight – Zach wants to play cards and I can’t see a way out of it. Can I make it up to you when we get back to London?
He’d sent that at midnight, but it had only just come through.
Leo: Morning, beautiful. Land ahoy! Sorry about last night I got waylaid and couldn’t get away – I’ll tell you all about it at breakfast. One final fry-up at our usual table?
The absolute cheek of him. Rifling through women like Barbie Queue flicks through frocks.
There was only one way to deal with a man like that.
Delete and block. I felt like such an idiot.
I’d let myself get distracted and now the pitch was only two weeks away, with only one solid pitch idea around unimaginable moments.
Me: Hey. I’m still packing. Don’t think I’ll make it down.
I marched back to the room, my stomach grumbling; there was a packet of Hobnobs in my case somewhere… I’d have to make do with tepid tea and biscuits to keep me going. I kept my head down as I tunnelled along the corridor and nearly collided with Brooke as she overtook me on the corner.
‘Oh!’ she said, jumping back. ‘Good mornin’, Kat! Lovely day ain’t it?’
‘Hi! Yes!’ I said, with false bright eyes, feeling awkward. She wasn’t to know I knew, and I knew she didn’t know about me and Leo, so it wasn’t like she’d done anything wrong. Girl code made me want to share but client-agency code meant I couldn’t. There were a lot of different boundaries at play.
‘You comin’ for breakfast, doll?’
‘Already done!’ I lied. ‘I’ve been up since six, making the most of these final few hours. Leo is heading down there though.’
‘No surprises there. I swear that man has a double,’ Brooke said, with a titter. ‘He’s everywhere!’
Ain’t that the truth. ‘He keeps himself busy – I’ll give him that.’ Bedding the client and the competition in the same twenty-four hours was no mean feat.
‘Nothing but the work will sway me, honey, don’t you worry. And Greg is just the same.’ Leo probably had plans to bed Greg pre-pitch as well.
Thiago’s velvety voice interrupted us over the Tannoy.
‘Ladies and gentlemen, I am sad to say it, but we are nearing the end of our time together on the Esmeralda. I hope you have enjoyed cruising with us – thank you for joining her maiden voyage. We are on time and due back into Dover Ferry Port at twelve noon. Please leave your bags outside your rooms by nine-thirty and the crew will take them to the departure deck. Thank you.’
‘See you later!’ Brooke called as she carried on down the corridor. I pulled out my phone and fired off one final text to Leo as I walked back to my room.
Me: Brooke is on her way down though, if you’re keen for company.
Knock yourself out, Leo. I didn’t want to look churlish, but I couldn’t resist.
Leo: Eh? I’m not keen for just any old company – I want to have breakfast with you!
I switched my phone off. He didn’t know I knew and my mind was too full to think of an appropriately cutting reply.
Best to ignore and get myself packed ASAP.
Then I’d just have to hide around the ship and avoid him until we got back to Dover.
He was just another disappointing man, but it wasn’t his fault – they were all like it.
If I’d met him on Tinder my expectations wouldn’t have been so high; that was what made it so gutting.
He’d convinced me he was different, one of the good ones.
I rolled my clothes up and stuffed them in my tiny suitcase.
All but one – the dress Barbie Queue had loaned me for the captain’s dinner.
Ivy had been hanging out in our wardrobe ever since, so I left my suitcase outside my door and took her down to Barb’s dressing room and knocked gently.
‘Come back tomorrow!’ Eek. There was no tomorrow on this cruise but Barb clearly wasn’t in the mood for company.
I hung Ivy on the doorframe with two feather boas dangling off her shoulders, and tiptoed away. I was halfway down the corridor when the door flew open and she emerged in a cloud of raspberry vape, fully made up in a gold catsuit. The dress toppled and landed on her head.
‘What the pissin’ hell’s going on…?’
‘Sorry Barb, I was just returning your dress. I should have brought it back ages ago. I didn’t mean to interrupt you…’
She scoffed. ‘What’re you bringing it back for? It’s yours now, love. It was made for you. Take it.’
I wouldn’t get much wear out of a crystal-covered ball gown back in Camden, but I didn’t want to seem ungrateful. ‘Are you sure?’ I asked, more tentative than delighted.
‘Yes, darlin’, you enjoy it. Wear it somewhere fabulous with that boyfriend of yours.’
‘Who? I haven’t got one…?’
She snorted. ‘The fella who’s always staring at you. That confident one – with the quiff.’
‘Leo?’
‘That’s him. Put it on and go for drinks at The Ritz. Do it for Jane. Hop up on the grand piano and make a show of yourself. Promise me you will?’ She eyeballed me fiercely. ‘Ivy is a glamorous goddess, and she deserves to have a good time – please don’t hide her away in a plastic bag.’
‘I won’t, don’t worry,’ I said, imagining myself slithering around on a piano like Marilyn Monroe and an army of security guards throwing me out. ‘I’ll take her to The Ritz and send you a photo.’
Barb closed her eyes and nodded dramatically, and I couldn’t tell if she was being real or it was all part of her act. It must be hard to slip in and out of character. ‘Come back and see us soon, Kat, won’t you, love?’
My stomach churned. ‘If we win the pitch, I’ll be back; I can promise you that. And if we don’t… well, then I’d like to audition for The Crustaceans.’
She rolled her eyes and sucked on her vape. ‘I’m not sure you’ve got the rhythm, love. No offence.’
I laughed and gave her a hug, which was all boobs and trying to avoid her foundation.
‘Think about it.’
I was sad to walk away from my holiday sister – not that I needed any more sisters – but I’d felt like we’d bonded.
Or was it just me who felt like that? Barb would do the same gig with the next group of guests and forget all about me.
The transient life of cruising crew. Working on the ship for months at a time, performing under the spotlight night after night.
Never really having any privacy. Your life on show for all to see – every minute of every day.
I wandered back to my room, more out of habit than anything else as the cleaners were already in there getting it ready for the next person.
It was time to give my sea legs a rest and change my cruising status to disembarked.
Despite the relentless activities schedule and Heidi breathing down my neck, the past few weeks had somehow made me feel extra holidayed and extra rested.
If I hadn’t been here because of work, PR would have been the last thing on my mind.
What a funny thing cruising was. A blip of time where a microcosm of society goes on a boating holiday together.
And soon we’d all be gone again, like dandelion seeds on the wind blowing in different directions.
Light, tiny and quickly forgotten. I turned the corner and froze at the sight of Leo standing outside my door with a plate of pastries and a tropical crush.
I wasn’t ready to face him yet, so I tiptoed back out of sight and waited until he gave up, my heart thumping with sadness, already broken in two.