Chapter 13
Grace
Fifteen Years Old
Danny sobs into my shoulder, eyes red and swollen as we cling to each other, huddled up in our special spot. Shaded by the oak trees and sitting on our favorite log, a cool breeze wraps around us as silent tears stream down my face. This one hurts. Plus, his pain is my pain.
“Gracie,” he sniffles, “you know how best friends always say stuff like ‘promise me you’ll be the best man at my wedding’ or ‘promise me we’ll celebrate our twenty-first birthdays together?’”
Red leaves fall from the sky and land on his thigh. I take a deep breath, trying to slow my racing heart. “Yeah?”
“Well, the good times are easy. You’re already happy, you know? Will you promise me something else instead?” he asks, his lip quivering.
“Anything, Danny.”
He wipes the tears dripping off his chin with the back of his hand, looking hopelessly for his constant sidekick, Charger.
“Promise me, if either of us goes through something hard, we’ll be there for each other. I’ll need you, Gracie.”
“I need you t-too, Danny.”
The present tense seems to slip right past him in his grief.
I clear my throat. “Is T-Tori coming?”
“I didn’t tell her.”
My jaw drops on reflex. He didn’t tell his girlfriend that his constant companion is gone? “You didn’t t-tell her Charger’s…?”
“We only ever hang out at her house, so she’s never met him.” He brushes it off like it doesn’t matter. But his averted, downturned eyes tell a different story.
Trying to smooth things over, I say, “Well, I’m sure she would—”
“I don’t really want to talk about her right now,” he replies quietly, swiping at a tear sliding down the side of his nose.
He’s right. It’s Charger’s day, and it’s already hard enough. I muster some remaining courage to give Danny the note I brought.
“So…so, I actually b-brought something with me.” I shakily pull the wrinkled piece of paper out of my pocket. “I wrote d-down some things about Charger.”
“You wrote Charger a eulogy?”
I shrug. “Maybe? I guess I wanted t-to write d-down what he meant t-to me.”
Danny’s lips part in surprise.
“I’m sorry, is that weird? I probably shouldn’t have—”
“No, Gracie. It’s perfect. I just…thank you.”
My face heats at how genuine he sounds. “Oh. Okay. Anyways, here you go,” I whisper as I lift my hand to give him the note.
He puts his hand on mine to stop me. “Can you read it out loud? I can’t read anything for shit right now. Everything’s blurry.”
I breathe out a small laugh. He’s not wrong. Sunken shoulders, snotty noses, windblown hair…both of us have looked better.
“Actually, never mind. I know you hate reading out loud. Sorry, it was a dumb idea.”
“I’ll d-do it. I d-don’t mind reading t-to you. Especially here.” I gesture to our surroundings. Our clearing is familiar, but also entirely foreign without Charger walking alongside the cold water creek.
Wiping my hands on my jeans and unwrinkling the paper, I clear my throat a few times and start to read.
“Charger was the t-type of friend that anyone would b-be lucky t-to have…loyal, kind, and t-trustworthy. Someone who would sit in the t-trenches with you on your saddest d-days, and someone who would lift you up even higher on your happiest d-days. Charger was the third member of the most epic friendship of my life, and I will cherish every memory of him playing here, in our special spot.” I take a deep breath as I finish up the note.
“I hope you’ve found friends up there. I hope you’re spending your d-days chasing after all the footballs you could ever want.
I hope you’re safe and warm. And, I hope the rainbow b-bridge is all it’s cracked up t-to b-be, b-bud. I love you.”
After I’m done reading, I look up at Danny. I expect him to still be crying over Charger, as the tears haven’t stopped since we got to our special spot. What I don’t expect is for him to look at me, eyes clear and wide, with…amazement? Pride? His emotional shift makes me wonder what he’s thinking.
“Gracie, that was…I never want to forget this. Can I have it?”
“Sure, it’s no b-big d-deal. Here you go.” I place the wrinkled paper in the palm of his hand.
“Thank you. I’ll keep this forever.” He carefully folds the already-wrinkled paper like it’s valuable and sticks it in the pocket of his jacket.
“Fact for a Feeling?” I sniff.
“Go ahead.”
“D-Dogs dream, d-did you know that? And senior d-dogs dream even more than younger d-dogs. What d-do you think Charger dreamed about?”
Danny stares at me like I’m the most precious person in the universe simply for sharing this fact.
“I bet he dreamed about the same things we do, since he spent most of his time with us anyway.”
I hum. “What d-do you dream about then?”
“Us, Gracie. I dream about us.”